The 29+ Best Donation Jokes

The local charity realized that it had never received a donation from the city's most successful lawyer.

So a volunteer paid the lawyer a visit in his lavish office. The volunteer opened the meeting by saying, 'Our research shows that even though your annual income is over two million dollars, you don't give a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give something back to your community?.

The law...

Why are sperm donations more expensive than blood donations?

They are hand made

Today a woman knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool.

I gave her a glass of water. I love supporting the comminity.

A priest, a pastor, and a rabbit walked into a blood donation clinic.

A priest, a pastor, and a rabbit walked into a blood donation clinic. The nurse asked the rabbit, “What is your blood type?” The rabbit responded, “I’m probably a type O.”

A local charity realized that it had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer.

The volunteer in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute. "Our research shows that out of a yearly income of more than $600,000 you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?"

The lawyer thought about it for a minut...

A priest, a monk, and a rabbit walk in a bar. As they approach the bar, they see a blood donation booth. The rabbit hops to the nurse to be the first to donate. The nurse looks at him and ask: “What’s your blood group?”

The rabbit says: "I dunno, I think I might be a Type-O."

A Priest, an Imam and a Rabbit walk into a blood donation clinic

The nurse asks them, gentlemen, do you know your blood types?

The priest replies, “Yes I am AB+”

The Imam replies, “I am a B +”

And finally the Rabbit replies, “I am not too sure but I think that I’m a Type O”

I was never a fan of organ donation.

But then I had a change of heart.

Why do the nurses at the blood donation clinic have autocorrect disabled?

Because they always want more type-o’s.

Yesterday, I went for blood donation.

But they didn't let me though. Asking too many questions..
"Where did you get it? Whose blood is it? Why is it in the bucket?"

TIL sperm donors are paid $50 per donation.

It was devastating. Imagine all the money that has slipped through my fingers.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A girl meets a guy at the donation clinic.

He asks her, "So what are you donating today?". She replies, "I'm giving blood, I get $25 for it! What are you here for?". He smiles and says "Oh I'm donating semen. I get $150 for it." The girl is shocked and outraged. The next month, the same guy sees the same girl and asks, "Oh you here giving bl...

When Bill Gates donates 30% of his net worth

He is praised as a generous hero, But when I do it people tell me they don't accept donations under a dollar.

So this young kid goes out to solicit donations for Jehovah’s witnesses.

It’s dark and cold and the rain is coming down in buckets. He sees a house with the lights on and runs up the driveway and knocks on the door. Half a minute later the owner opens the door and the young fellow informs him who he is.

“Well don’t stand out there in the rain. Come on in and dry ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What can be said about a sperm bank's pornographic materiel that can also be said about the sperm donation experience in its entirety?

So it's come to this

I was recently targeted by an organ donation scam

They tried to convince me that, for a small monthly fee, I could have priority access to organ donation from the recently deceased.

It was a dead giveaway.

My coworker is asking for donations for his charity marathon

But I’m afraid he’s just going to take the money and run

Thanks to your donations, we've completely transformed this homeless man...

Into a homeless woman.

A red cross worker is cold calling people for donations

A Red Cross worker is cold calling people for donations and comes across a lawyer where records shows he makes $500k+ a year and hasn’t made a single charitable donation. So the Red Cross worker calls the lawyer and asks if he’d like to donate. The lawyer says “no “,thank you.” The Red Cross worker ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm thinking about starting a donation website for men who can't afford Viagra

I was going to call it "Dick starter"

Donations

A man was sitting at a bar, morosely staring at his untouched beer. The bartender walked over and asked, "What's the problem, pal?" "My brother just told me there's a sperm bank in his neighborhood that pays $50 for a donation." "Yeah, so?"

"Don't you realize?" the man cried. "I've let a for...

The Charlie Brown Foundation is now accepting donations.

All proceeds go towards good grief counsellors.

He was going to make a donation to the spern bank

However nothing is firm yet.

Blood Donation

I went to give blood the other day, what an awful experience. The nurses just wouldn't stop asking me questions, constantly.

"Who's blood is that?"

"Where did you get it?"

"Why is it in a bucket?"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Just back from the sperm donation clinic...

Nurse asked me ‘could you masturbate in the cup’ I said im good, but not competition standard

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Zebo, a half blind 5 year old African orphan has to ride 7 miles a day to school with only one leg on a bicycle with buckled wheels and no brakes. Please give just a small donation of $10....

...and we will send you the video; it's fucking hilarious!

A driver was stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside Washington, DC Nothing was moving.

Suddenly, a man knocks on the window.

The driver rolls down the window and asks,
"What's going on?"

"Terrorists have kidnapped the entire US Congress, and they're asking for a $100 million dollar ransom. Otherwise, they are going to douse them all in gasoline and set them on fir...

My wife is so pious and biased that she can't see how virtuous I am when making charitable donations to help the plight of single mothers

All she sees is hookers

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Scottish blood

An Arab Sheik was admitted to the hospital for heart surgery, but prior to the surgery, the doctors needed to have some of his blood type stored in case the need arose. As the gentleman had an extremely rare type of blood that couldn't be found locally, the call went out around the world.

...

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