UPJOKE
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Why did Paul Walker cross the road?

Because he wasn’t wearing a seat belt.

what's the difference between Paul Walker and Betty White?

Paul Walker hit 100 before he died.

I added Paul Walker on Xbox,

but he spends all his time on the dashboard.

An 18 y/o boy getting a BJ from and 80 y/o woman and a tightrope walker have the same thought...What is it?

Don't look down!


My Dad broke this one out this morning thought I would share.

What's it called when Herschel Walker has diarrhea?

A Georgia runoff.

Did you know that Paul Walker had dandruff?

I didn’t know either, until I saw his Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment.

What do you call a walker who can’t run?

Hershel

I should really think about becoming a tightrope walker

Even the bank says my balance is outstanding!

I hope Rand Paul doesn't pick Scott Walker as his VP

I have a feeling Paul/Walker would crash and burn.

Reporter: Herschel Walker, what do you think of the latest abortion bill?

Herschel Walker: I think we should pay it.

I can see why Paul Walker jokes aren't funny anymore.

Poor guy can't catch a "brake".









(P.S. Happy Birthday Paul Walker. I wish u were still here)

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A tight rope Walker is walking a tight rope between two buildings on the 85th floor in new York. At the same time in South Texas is getting a blow job from a 85 year old lady. What are both men thinking?

Don't look down.

When a group gather to make fun of the Walker Texas Ranger...

...It's a Chuck Roast

What's scarier than a skin-walker?

4 skin-walker

Did you hear about the street walker in Venice?

She drowned.

Did you hear about Paul Walker on the radio?

And the dashboard and pretty much the rest of the interior

Today I helped a little old lady with a walker across a busy street

And some of the other car drivers were so inspired they joined me in honking at her.

Did you hear that Herschel Walker tried to run over some kids and was arrested attempted vehicular manslaughter

In fairness, there was a sign "Drive like your kids live here".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy gets put in a nursing home by his son. He doesn’t know if he’s going to like it at first, but he decides to give it a shot for his son’s sake.

The first morning in the nursing home he wakes up with a hard on. Out of nowhere a beautiful nurse's aide walks in, bends over & blows him without saying a word.
The guy gets on the phone with his son and says, "Son, I love this place! Thank you so much for putting me in this nursing home....

What's the one piece of advice that would benefit both a tightrope walker and a guy getting a b.j. from an 85-year-old woman?

"Don't look down."

What does The Walking Dead, Game of Thrones and Fast and Furious have in common?

All their Walkers are dead

Have you heard of Alan Walker’s criminal brother?

Jay Walker

Robber and walker

Late one night in the capitol city an Army deserter wearing a ski mask jumped into the path of a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs.

"Give me your money!" he demanded.

Indignant, the affluent man replied, "You can't do this
...I'm a Member of Parliament!"

"In that...

Why did the tiger eat the tightrope walker?

It wanted a balanced diet.

What was Paul Walker last words?

I could have had a V8.

Tightrope walkers do really dangerous things.

They put their lives on the line!

What do both Paul Walker and Vin Diesel have in common?

Both of their last big hits were trees

I've decided to become a tightrope walker!

I figured I should give it a try since all my credit card companies say my balance is outstanding!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What does a tightrope walker have in common with a 30 year old man getting a blowjob from an 80 year old woman?

Neither one of them wants to look down.

Watched a film called Speed Walker

To be honest, I found it hard to keep up. The pacing was terrible.

Two old guys are having a chat in a nursing home, when a naked old woman with a walker crosses very slowly in front of them

First guy says, "Elmer - what the hell was that?"

Second guy says, "Joe - I have no idea, but it certainly needed ironing!"

2 ladies are walking their dogs. One has a big black lab, the other has a chihuahua. They pass a bar and the lab owner says “Let’s get a beer.”

The chihuahua walker complains, “We can’t take our dogs in there.”

The first responds, “Watch me.”

The lab owner strolls in with her dog and orders a beer.

The bartender tells her, "Sorry, you can't bring your dog in here."

“He's my seeing eye dog," the woman replies f...

A husband and wife and their ten kids are waiting to board the subway.

When the subway arrives, it is nearly full. The husband tells his wife "Honey, you should board this train with the kids, and I'll catch the next train." The wife does so, and the train departs with his wife and ten children.

While waiting for the train, there is an old man with a walker...

Selling Paul Walker's keyboard on ebay ( $100 )

Disclaimer: it's missing a key ( previous owner lost CTRL ).

Jim walked into a bar....

Jim, walked into a bar and aggressively shouted his order to the bartender

”Please give me a plate of chicken wings and then give everyone half a kilo steak and mutton, cause when I eat,
I want everyone to eat!”

The bartender complies, by giving Jim a plate of chicken wings and eve...

If Paul Walker was alive right now, I bet he would be

Frantically scratching at the inside of his coffin.

Which food killed the tightrope walker?

A falafel.

Have I ever told you my Dad was a stilt walker?

I really looked up to him.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Unfortunately due to unforseen circumstances Johnny Walker could not be with us tonight....

But, he's with us in spirit.

I hate discussing things with Jay walkers

they always try to cross subjects at inappropriate times.

The Fast and the Furious 10 title should be dedicated to Paul Walker

Fast 10: Your Seatbelts

What do Paul Walker and George of The Jungle have in common?

They both should've watched out for that tree.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I got arrested for killing a walker.

Sleep walking my ass.

Racecar backwards is still racecar.

But racecar sideways is how Paul Walker died.

What do you call a street walker in the winter?

A frostitute

why cant Paul Walker use tumblr?

He only sticks to the dashboard

How are millenials and tightrope walkers alike?

Compromise their net and they will literally die.

Alan Walker was already a millionaire when he was 19

Where are you now

John Wayne vs. Johnnie Walker

What the difference between John Wayne and Johnnie Walker?

Johnnie Walker is still killing indians.

What's a tightrope walker's favourite beverage?

Stabili-tea.

What do my dad and Paul Walker have in common?

I'm never going to see them again.

What happened to all the Paul Walker jokes?

It seems like they started going pretty fast, then just...stopped.

Why does the farmer let walkers cross his field for free?....

....because the bull charges.

If Bran dies and a white walker brings him back...

Is he Raisin Bran?

Did you hear about the dog-walker that went missing?

Police say they are following a few leads.

What do Barcelona FC and a dog walker with Parkinson's have in common?

Neither of them can hold a lead.

Did you know Paul walker was on the radio when he died?

He was also on the dashboard, the windscreen and the steering wheel.

A man and his wife are sitting down to dinner.

A man and his wife are sitting down to dinner.

“Ringling Brothers is coming to town this week,” she said. “The poster says they have a dancing bear. I always wanted to see one of those.”

“Maybe next year,” says the man. “Work’s really busy this week.”

The next night at dinner, t...

Accountant Joke

The CEO of a large corporation called his directors for a meeting. He asked the director of development, "Mr. Jones, what is two plus two?"

Mr. Jones, looking a bit confused, replied, "Two plus two is four, Sir."

The CEO said, "Ya, that\`s what I thought you would say." Then he asked...

What's Paul Walker's favorite energy drink???

N.O.S.



too bad he can't handle the crash...

Sergeant: ‘Are we any closer to solving the case of the missing dog-walker?’

Detective: ‘Well I’ve got a lead but nothing else has turned up’

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