Why did Paul Walker cross the road?

Because he wasn’t wearing a seat belt.

What was Paul Walker last words?

I could have had a V8.

I've decided to become a tightrope walker!

I figured I should give it a try since all my credit card companies say my balance is outstanding!

Tightrope walkers do really dangerous things.

They put their lives on the line!

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What is a High Wire Walker and a guy getting a blowjob from a 97 year old woman both thinking?

Whatever you do..don't look down.

Have I ever told you my Dad was a stilt walker?

I really looked up to him.

How did the paramedics know Paul Walker had clean hair?

They found his head and shoulders in the glove box

What is Jimmie 'JJ' Walker's favorite NES game?

Gyro**MITE**

What do Paul Walker and George of The Jungle have in common?

They both should've watched out for that tree.

What do both Paul Walker and Vin Diesel have in common?

Both of their last big hits were trees

What does Kevin Hart have in common with Paul Walker?

Being friends with the rock!

Wait, what did you think I was going to say?

There was this drunk walking down the street

He walks up to this cop and he says, “man, somebody stole my car”.

And the cops says, “well where was it”... and he says “it was right on the end of this key”.

The cop says, “I don’t know man, why don’t you go down to the precinct house and report it down there. They’ll fill out all t...

I added Paul Walker to my Xbox

But all he does is spend time on the dashboard

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A dude gets stranded on a deserted isle all alone....

Six months later, a woman walks out of the ocean in a wet suit. She's gorgeous.

She strolls up and says, "Want a scotch on ice?"

The guy is dumbfounded and nods yes.

She unzips the wet suit a little and pulls out a flask, ice and a glass. She makes a Walker over ice.

She ...

Daily Covid-19 check

At 7 p.m. open the whiskey bottle and smell it.

If you can smell, you are not infected.

Then pour it in in a glass tumbler.

Taste it. if you can feel the taste, you are not infected.

\~ Dr Johnny Walker

Selling Paul Walker's keyboard on ebay ( $100 )

Disclaimer: it's missing a key ( previous owner lost CTRL ).

If Game of Thrones was written by M. Night Shyamalan, what would he have called the White Walkers?

Icy Dead People

The Fast and the Furious 10 title should be dedicated to Paul Walker

Fast 10: Your Seatbelts

What advice did the dietician give the tightrope walker?

You need a balanced diet

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The other day

An Englishman, American and Irishman were having a drink at the bar. The Englishman says to the others "The other day, I went into my daughters room and found a cigarette! I didn't even know that she smoked!".


The American chuckles "That's nothing! The other day I went into my daught...

Why did the bankrupt tightrope walker retire?

He no longer had outstanding balance.

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What's the difference between my PC and Paul Walker?

I actually give a shit when my PC crashes.

Did you hear about Paul Walker on the radio?

And the dashboard and pretty much the rest of the interior

An 18 y/o boy getting a BJ from and 80 y/o woman and a tightrope walker have the same thought...What is it?

Don't look down!


My Dad broke this one out this morning thought I would share.

I hope Rand Paul doesn't pick Scott Walker as his VP

I have a feeling Paul/Walker would crash and burn.

What do Barcelona FC and a dog walker with Parkinson's have in common?

Neither of them can hold a lead.

Love at Last!

George, age 92 and Edith, age 89 are all excited about their decision to get married.They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding and on the way they pass a drugstore. George suggests they go in and he addresses the man behind the counter.

"Are you the owner? "The pharmacist answers, "Yes". <...

I hate discussing things with Jay walkers

they always try to cross subjects at inappropriate times.

Which food killed the tightrope walker?

A falafel.

If Paul Walker was alive right now, I bet he would be

Frantically scratching at the inside of his coffin.

Watched a film called Speed Walker

To be honest, I found it hard to keep up. The pacing was terrible.

What do you call a street walker in the winter?

A frostitute

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A Navy Rhyme

A Navy man, a war hero, attends a lunch at a Ladies’ Patriotic Society. Cucumber sandwiches on crustless bread – he endures it manfully. Then the ladies, who have been at the sherry, ask to hear a Navy rhyme. Ladies, he says, I will accede to your request. But in place of each atrocious word, I will...

Alan Walker was already a millionaire when he was 19

Where are you now

Walkers have brought out some new flavours for christmas this year

Along with pigs in blankets and glazed ham flavours, they have the more realistic xmas joys like Brussels sprout flavour.
Ungrateful child flavour, moaning resentful relative flavour, and my personal favourite, drunken row and domestic violence flavour .

Why does the farmer let walkers cross his field for free?....

....because the bull charges.

An indian lady visited a bar for the first time,

She sat at the table in front of the bar tender,

A guy at her left side ordered : "Jack Daniels , Single"

A guy at her right side ordered: "Johnny Walker , Single"

The bar tender looked at the lady and asked : "And you..?"

The lady replied : "Meenachi shockalingam , Marri...

Sergeant: ‘Are we any closer to solving the case of the missing dog-walker?’

Detective: ‘Well I’ve got a lead but nothing else has turned up’

If Bran dies and a white walker brings him back...

Is he Raisin Bran?

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I got arrested for killing a walker.

Sleep walking my ass.

How are millenials and tightrope walkers alike?

Compromise their net and they will literally die.

After a fight, my girlfriend wanted to know where we stood. I told her I loved her like Vin Diesel loves Paul Walker. She got all giddy and told me how much she loves me too.

I looked at her with confusion and clarified: "What I meant was you're dead to me."

A man and his wife are sitting down to dinner.

“Ringling Brothers is coming to town this week,” she said. “The poster says they have a dancing bear. I always wanted to see one of those.”

“Maybe next year,” says the man. “Work’s really busy this week.”

The next night at dinner, the man can barely sit down before his wife starts talk...

Did you know Paul walker was on the radio when he died?

He was also on the dashboard, the windscreen and the steering wheel.

Jim walked into a bar......

Jim, walked into a Bar and aggressively shouted his order to the bartender

”Please give me a plate of chicken wings and then give everyone half a kilo steak and mutton, cause when I eat,
I want everyone to eat!”

The bartender complies to this by giving Jim a plate of chicken wings ...

Paul Walker took up Zen Buddism not long before his death. . .

He became one with a tree.

What happened to all the Paul Walker jokes?

It seems like they started going pretty fast, then just...stopped.

An old man is at home on his deathbed...

The doctors have given him only a couple of days to live and he no longer has even the strength to stand on his own. He lays in bed, thinking back on his life - his children, his parents, and his beautiful wife of 55 years. As he lays there, remembering the good times, he begins to feel himself drif...

why cant Paul Walker use tumblr?

He only sticks to the dashboard

What's the saddest part of Paul Walker being CGI in Fast 7?

Realizing they should have used CGI the whole time

Did you hear about the dog-walker that went missing?

Police say they are following a few leads.

Johnnie Walker, Jack Daniels and Jim Beam walk into a bar

What is this, said the bartender, Alcoholics Eponymous?

Why did the tiger eat the tightrope walker?

He wanted a well-balanced meal.

When small talk with the neighbors gets awkward.

I live in the Bible Belt and took a stroll around the neighborhood earlier in the week. At the turnaround an old man with a walker was getting the mail. He asked me my name and we engaged in some small talk.

&nbsp;

I was about to leave, but his wife came outside so I stayed and sai...

Girl: Come over

Guy: Coming over

Girl: we should really stop using walker talkies in bed over

I remember when Paul Walker was all over the news...

Then he was all over the front seat, windows and steering wheel...

Books I’d recommend

‘Excel in Maths’ by Cal Q. Luss

’Marine Giants’ by Meg LeDonne

‘DIY Automotive Repair’ by Carly King

‘Orchestral Percussion’ by Tim Penny

‘I Got Away With a Minor Crime’ by Jay Walker

‘Nordic Vodka’ by Finn Landia

John Wayne vs. Johnnie Walker

What the difference between John Wayne and Johnnie Walker?

Johnnie Walker is still killing indians.

What do you call slow walkers?

Meanderthals

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Two old guys are sitting at a table in the nursing home, when a totally nude old lady with a walker streaks slowly past them

One guy says to the other, " I can't see so well anymore. What was that?"

The other guy says, "I'm not sure, but it definitely needed ironing."

I went on a date with this girl...

and for some reason we got to the topic of celebrity crushs
I told her that mine was Cardi B

She told me that her crush was Paul Walker, I immediately replied with 'so we have similar tastes'. She gave me a confused look so I elaborated by saying 'well both of them used to be wrapped arou...

What's Paul Walker's favorite energy drink???

N.O.S.



too bad he can't handle the crash...

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My mate tried some Walkers mystery flavour crisps last night and swore they tasted like his wife's pussy,

He thought it was his imagination but everyone in the pub said he was right!

Working at the circus

I used to work for a circus. The life was rough but we had some really good and talented acts. We had clowns, jugglers, contortionists, tight rope walkers and even a fire breather. Our boss was a real prick. She made us wear uncomfortable uniforms they didn’t really fit. The pants worked similarly t...

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A man was walking his dog through a graveyard when he saw a man kneeling behind a headstone.

‘Morning’ the walker shouted. ‘No, just having a shit’ the man replied.

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