UPJOKE
visitsessiongatheringcongressconferenceconfluencesummitconvergenceforumcouncilassemblageseminarencountermergingget together

Meetings Jokes

I used to make jokes at work during meetings, and I could really get people laughing. Then COVID hit, and all our meetings were online. I'd still make jokes, but no one would laugh...

Not one. At first, I thought it was just because everyone was muted. It turns out, they didn't find me remotely funny.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I set the pornhub theme as my ring tone, because if anyone at business meetings recognizes it they'll be too ashamed to comment.

They did stop shaking my hand though...

My coworkers laugh at my jokes in in-person meetings, but never in online meetings.

When I asked them why, they said that my jokes weren't remotely funny.

Weekly cult meetings

A cult holds weekly meetings and all members are expected to attend regularly. This week only two cultists show up. After waiting awkwardly for awhile making small talk, they realize no one else is coming.

Both of them are getting nervous and they admit to each other they missed last weeks c...

I really hate meetings

I really wish “me” werent in meetings

"Zoom meetings" is a stupid name, and it's branded. We should call it a bit more casual like "coworker video chat"...

Or something shorter, like "co-vid".

Recently I've been attending meetings of Eavesdroppers Anonymous

... not that they know.

Current political meetings

Ministers said to have considered three options during yesterday's cabinet meeting, thought to be Stilton, Wensleydale and Brie.

Family meetings

I took my girlfriend back to my parents house to meet my family last night

"This is my dad, and this is my twin brother"

"Oh how cute" she said "who's the oldest"

"My dad obviously you idiot" I replied

They weird thing about the Erectile Dysfunction support groups is they're always planning meetings (NSFW)

But nobody can come.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My premature ejaculation sufferers support meetings were going so well

I decided to stop coming.

Zoom meetings are basically seances with the living...

Brian, are you there? Make a sound if you can hear us. Is anyone with you? Can you hear us?

What Do You Call Mondays without Any Zoom Meetings?

Meetless Mondays

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I don't understand why everyone thinks the KKK are racist.

Every week at our meetings there's always tons of black people hanging around.

Told my co-workers this joke about mandatory meetings.

You really had to be there.

Where do pumpkins hold meetings?

The gourdroom

I tend to not move much during online meetings...

I'm told I have a resting glitch face.

"Meetings"

What a Jamaican calls everything he owns.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.