Zoom meetings are basically seances with the living...
Brian, are you there? Make a sound if you can hear us. Is anyone with you? Can you hear us?
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A young man gets hit by a bus and his mother holds a seance.
A young man gets hit by a bus and his distraught mother calls a mystic and they hold a seance.
The mystic tells the mother that it's very good she called so soon, because the spirits of the deceased only have a short time while they are awaiting their eternal destination to commune with the l...
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Why did the chicken attend a seance?
To get to the other side.
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I met my first wife at a seance.
I was a regular, she was a medium.
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I was at a seance and the spiritualist kept giggling, so I punched him.
My mother always told me to strike a happy medium.
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A seance conductor came to our house.
"I'm hearing something," he said. "Someone is giving me a signal."
"Who is it?" I asked.
"Your mother," the seance conductor said, looking at my girlfriend.
"It can't be!" said my girlfriend.
"No, quite right," laughed the seance conductor, "but you should've seen the exc...
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How did the French-German psychic perform a seance?
On a Yes-Yes board.
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I used to do seances behind the bar
The management put a stop to it, they said the spirits were disappearing.
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A guy once did a seance to see his undead girlfriend
He has ghosted her ever since.
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Why can't you have a mechanical wave seance in space?
Cause you'd need a medium
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What do you use when you want to clean windows during a seance?
a squeegee board.
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Justin Bieber has said, "I feel like the Kurt Cobain of my generation, but people just don't understand me."
By a curious co-incidence, Kurt Cobain, contacted in a seance, said, "I felt like the Justin Bieber of my generation, so I killed myself."
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What are ghosts favorite movie genre?
Seance-fiction
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Just got a Jury Summons
That’s the last time I do a seance in a court house.
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I saw my roommate carrying a crystal ball and candles
"What do you need a crystal ball and candles for?" I asked.
"I'm going to conduct a ritual to speak with the dead."
"Oh. Makes seance."
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Ghosts.
I don't know when it comes to ghosts and the afterlife, I like to think I'm open minded, maybe there something in it, maybe there isn't.
Actually I recently attended a seance. The psychic who ran it told us she was delighted with the way her business was going. Absolutely booked up solid. ...
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What should you do before you do an exorcism of your house
Do a little reconnai-seance
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There was once a friendly mute ghost, ironically named sound.
Sound was a very social ghost so he showed up to several seances, but every time he couldn’t talk to the people who had summoned him because he was mute, but he tried desperately to communicate anyways. He would slam doors and knock over lamps and turn on and off random appliances. After all of that...
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