“Doctor, I keep having terrible flashbacks when I listen to Korean pop music.”

“Thats a clear case of BTS-D.”

My dad was Korean and my mom was Mexican

Hi, I am Guacamo Lee

A North Korean Soldier Walks Into A Bar

The bartender asks, "How's it going?" The North Korean soldier replies, "Can't complain!"

What do you call a Korean high school girl who fights crime in spare time?

Kimchi Possible, obviously

What do you call a South Korean couple?

Seoul mates

A North Korean Judge walks out of the courtroom, laughing his head off

His friend approaches him and asks “what’s so funny?”

“Oh, I just heard the funniest political joke.” replies the Judge.

“Tell Me!”

“I can’t - I just gave someone life in prison for it!”

Why do North Koreans only sell one size of drink?

Because they have a Supreme Liter.

What sound does the slingshot North Korean nuke make when it's launced?

Pyongyang

North Koreans believe they live in the best country in the world because they’re brainwashed by the government and the media

But every American knows that America is the best country in the world

I asked my North Korean friend what was it like living there.

He said: he couldnt complain.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between Korean women with large breasts and lobsters?

One group is Busty asians and the other is Crustaceans.

A North Korean lady was in line in front of me at my bank in the U.S., trying to exchange some won. She was obviously irritated, arguing with the teller.

“Why it change? Yesterday I get two hunat dolla of won, today I get
only one hunat eighty. Why it change?”

Teller shrugs his shoulders, says, “Fluctuations.”

Korean lady says, “Fluc you white people too!”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If Chinese music is called C-pop, Korean music is called K-pop, and Japanese music is called J-pop, what do you call Drake's music?

Crap.

Police are on the hunt for a South Korean man accused of murdering his wife.

He is the Seoul suspect.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So, I've dating a really Sweet Korean girl...

I think she's my Seoul mate.

Edit: First Platinum thank you kind stranger!

My dad wanted to learn more about Korean culture.

K, pop.

Have you ever had traditional North Korean food?

That's OK, neither have the citizens.

If Korean pop is K-pop

Then Korean Rap is KRAP.

Know why North Koreans are so good at measuring stuff?

They have a supreme ruler

Why is the North Korean dictator so evil?

Because he has no Seoul.

Korean meatballs

They really are the dog's bollocks.

Two dictators are arguing about whose army is more obedient.

They walk to the edge of the cliff and call a soldier over. Putin commands his soldier to jump off the cliff. The soldier says "Please Putin, I have a wife and children."

Putin lets him go.

Kim Jong Un instructs a soldier to jump. The soldier is about to jump when Putin grabs his ar...

Two unrelated Korean girls who lost their sisters at birth met one day at the bar

They found that they looked rather similar. Both simultaneously asked "Did you go to Dr. Lee for plastic surgery?"

What's a North Korean's Favourite Card Game?

Kim Jong Uno

Recently I found out that the 'r' and 'l' characters are the same in Korean.

I guess that explains why they like their elections so much.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Afghan...

An Afghan, an Albanian, an Algerian, an American, an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguans, an Argentine, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was watching porn about a Korean girl and didn’t know which Korean she was from

Until she opened her fridge

I had a couple bad dreams last night about a Korean Boy Band

I think I might have BTSD

My Korean car broke down on me today...

It left me completely Hyundrai

Why are North Koreans always sad?

Because they are Seoulless

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If Korean Pop is KPop

Is Chinese Rap Crap?

EDIT: I just got on and looked at this post.....
THANK U SO MUCH!!!! This was my first post and it got all the way to the top!! Thank you sooo much!!

Why do North Korean navy boats have glass bottoms

So they can see their Air Force

A guy asks a north korean "what's life like in north Korea?"

North Korean answers "I can't complain"

Korean meatballs are the best.

In fact they're the dogs bollocks.

What's a North Korean farmer's favorite time of year?

Breakfast.

Korean joke

The number of South Korea's boys band singers is enough to defeat North Korea's entire army.

A Korean boy, who is the head chef of a local soup restaurant, is arrested for accusingly spitting in every bowl of soup that’s made and poisoning all of the customers. The other chefs knew about it and didn’t say anything at first, but eventually couldn’t hide it any longer and told the cops.

He is punished to serious, hard work for a month, but he is always upbeat no matter what. So one day the cops decide to see if any one of them can make the boy unhappy. One decides to put the boy’s shoes in a block of cement. The boy doesn’t care, and he just does his work with no shoes. Another dec...

Why do Koreans have so many popular things?

Aren't they afraid of fans?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Korean man and a Jewish man are in a bar, total strangers to one another.

The Jewish man walks up to the Korean man and, totally unprompted, punches him in the face.

Naturally, the Korean man goes "What was that for?"

The Jewish man responds, "That was for Pearl Harbor."

"Pearl Harbor? That was the Japanese," says the Korean man.

"Ah, Korean,...

How do you say R. Kelly in Korean??

So-Young Poon

I'm thinking of opening a Carribean/Korean fusion restaurant

I can call it "Seoul Food"

What do you call a North Korean dictator who produces music on SoundCloud?

Kim Jong Tune

I was watching the Korean remake of Blues Brothers

Yeah, my favourite part was when they do Seoul Man

A Russian, a Mexican, and a Korean all show up to a construction site and get hired.

The boss says that for their first day on the job, the Russian is in charge of concrete, the Mexican is in charge of wood, and the Korean is in charge of supplies.

The boss then leaves and comes back a few hours later to check up on his new workers.

He walks over to the Russian, and al...

What do you call a half indian and half korean?

A Curryan

Three Men are sitting at a bus stop

The first man says, "I served in the U.S. Army for 10 years. I was involved in the Korean War."

The second man says, "Nice. I served in the United States Marine Corps for 8 years. I was involved in the Iraq War."

The third man says, "I was involved in the War on Drugs. I served 15 year...

I am dating this half korean chick

I am dating this half korean chick
Her mom is korean
And her dad is korean
But her legs got ripped of in a car accident

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What does Kanye West and the North Korean people have in common?

Both are regularly fucked by Kim.

A North Korean Defector

A North Korean defector moves into an apartment in Chicago, and his new neighbor ask what was his apartment back home like.
"Oh it was perfect I couldn't complain " the defector replies.
"What about your job"
"Oh my old job was perfect,I couldn't complain".

"And the food?".
"Oh th...

[Pickup line] Are you the Korean peninsula?

Because I'm gonna split you in two

I just started dating a half Asian girl

Her Mom's Korean, her Dad's Korean, and she lost her legs in a horrible car accident.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Fuck you Korea

100% true.
My friend works as a biosecurity agent at Auckland Airport and told me about a time when his Korean colleague, Alex, had to process a Chinese passenger with a thick accent.

Alex: "Is there anything in your bag we should be concerned about?"

Passenger - " Fuck you Korea!"<...

Once the North Korean leader dies, who will take his place?

His next of Kim

For years I was searching for...

For years I was searching for the music of a korean show called 'Rep'. I searched all my life for that music. A good part of my life was attached to thaf show. But I cant find it. I lost all my hopes in it.

Now when I am near my death bed, some months ago I get used to reddit. What a womderfu...

Why are North Koreans required to give their books to Kim Jong-un?

Because he is their Supreme Reader

An American, a Mexican, a Chinese,

a German, a Korean, an Australian, a Canadian, a South African, a Brazilian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Dane, an Iraqi, a Singaporean, an Indian, an Egyptian, a Vietnamese, a Nicaraguan and a Brit walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! You can't come in here without a Thai"

My Korean friend died today.

He was So Yung.

I recently watched a North Korean horror movie

It turned out to be a documentary.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If Korean pop is kpop, what sort of music does Drake make?

Crap

An anti-joke I wrote

3 nuns, a rabbi, a soldier, 4 orphans, 2 blind men, 6 white guys, a Jew, 4 Koreans, a Canadian, 2 Italians, 6 prison guards, 5 blondes, 3 polish women, 4 atheists, a doctor, 7 grad students, 2 firemen, 3 birthday clowns, a police officer, 9 soccer moms, 2 soccer dads, a biologist, a chemist, 3 physi...

What is the North Korean equivalent of a Gallon?

One Supreme Litre.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A German sits alone in a bar, drinking, when a Korean walks in...

A German sits alone in a bar, drinking his sorrows away when a Korean walks in and sits right next to him. The German lets out a deep sigh in anticipation of the gloating.

Korean guy: “Let’s not talk about soccer, alright?”

The German looks up: “Oh... ok! That would be nice for a chang...

Why are North Korean literacy rates so high?

Because they have the supreme reader.

A korean couldn't find his coin, so basically ...

a korean lost a korean won

My dad told me I was listening to way too much Korean Music.

I told him, "K pop"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Asian man and a Jewish man walk into a bar

The Asian man goes: “Hi, my name is Joe Chan, what’s yours?”

The Jew replies: “Michael Goldberg... Hey you know, I never did forget you Koreans for Pearl Harbor.”

The Asian man, surprised, replies:
“Uhhh... Pearl Harbor was done by the Japanese, not Koreans, and I’m Chinese.”
...

So a new commander arrives in Korea during the Korean War at the beginning of a Chinese offensive.

So a new commander arrives in Korea at the beginning of the Chinese offensive. Wanting to gain information on the enemy he looks around and asks a Marine,

“what are their tactics, how do they fight?”

The Marine responds,

“Well the Chinese Army likes to attack in very small gro...

A Korean man walked into the currency exchange in New York City with 200,000 Korean won and walked out with $200...

The following week, he walked in with another 200,000 Korean won, and was handed $185. He asked the teller why he got less money that week than the previous week. The teller said , "Three syllables bro: Fluc-tu-ations." The Korean man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and...

TIL 50% of South Koreans have cataracts.

The other 50% drive Rincolns.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I don't get why Japanese people and South Korean people just can't get along.

I mean, they're all Chinese.

How many North Koreans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A hundred thousand. One to screw in the lightbulb, and the rest for holding the parade.

How many people does it take to start a K-Pop band?

Just one korean and a really good stylist

What do you call an ancient Korean man?

Jurassic Park

Why do North Korean police travel in groups of 3?

You need one to read.

You need one to write.

And you need a third to keep an eye on the intellectuals.

What's the difference between North Koreans and Americans?

The Americans had a chance to vote.

An old Korean saying:

"If the dog is barking, you didn't cook it enough."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A North Korean, United States, and Irish Politician walk into a bar.

They all order a beer. Upon going to drink them they notice a fly is floating in each of their beers.

The North Korean politician, outraged, declares war and that he will destroy the bar for allowing this to happen.

The politician from the United States declares tighter sanctions and ...

How do you clear a North Korean bingo hall?

B 52

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

On a cold night, during the Korean War, A young lieutenant arrives at a lonely Army camp.....

He was sent to replace the company commander who fell ill. The men greatly liked the old commander and weren't thrilled about getting a new one.. needless to say, the young lieutenant had a hard time fitting in but that didn't stop him from trying.
One night, while doing paper work, he saw severa...

An American, a Briton, and a North Korean look at a picture of Adam and Eve

An American, a Briton, and a North Korean look at a picture of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden and try to figure out what nationality they are.

The American says, "Look at how free and independent they are, they must be Americans."

The Briton says, "What are you talking about, look...

An American, a Korean, a Chinese, and a Russian walk into a bar...

...they settled into their seats and when they had loosened up after a few drinks they decided to extol the virtues of their homelands.

"American industry is so superb," said the American. "A sports team can decide to move to a different city, and within a year and a half we can build a stat...

The leaders of Russia, North Korea and the United States fly up to the international space station...

Upon their arrival, they all marvel at the view of the earth from such magnificent heights. They begin to toss around ideas of ways they could all benefit from the ISS.

The Russian leader talks about all of the opportunities to use imaging to spy on people from outerspace. The other leaders ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Kim Jong Un asked a well known North Korean composer to create a piece for him

The composer had many months to find people to play, and to write a piece. Once it was performed on stage, it sounded terrible. The players werent synchronized, and they were all playing the wrong notes. That night the composer was set to be executed.

Before the composer was put in the electr...

Before candles, what did North Korean communists use to light their homes with?

Electricity.

What term do you use to refer to a Korean’s brothers/sisters?

Next of Kim

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Chinese man walks into a bar and sits right next to a Jewish man.

The Jewish man starts eyeing the Chinese man suspiciously, a dark expression covering his face. Suddenly, with no warning at all, he stands up, grabs the Chinese man by the neck, smashes his face against the bar and throws him to the floor.

The Chinese man, dazed and angry, stands up and con...

Did you know that 80% of Korean businessmen have caddaracts?

The other 20% drive Mercedes

A father asks his child, "Could you please stop listening to Korean music?"

"K, pop."

A young Korean couple are lying in bed...

When the guy starts farting nonstop.

The girl, unable to take the smell, says, "Stop, that's disgusting!"

"Don't blame me", the guy says. "It's the dog."

"Oh, don't blame him", she says. "He was cooked perfectly."

Why can't North Koreans go to heaven?

Because they don't have a Seoul.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was talking to a North Korean about freedom

I told him, "You know what's the best thing about freedom? If I ever see President Trump, I can shout, 'Hey Mr. President, you're an asshole!'"

The North Korean answered, "I have that freedom too. If I ever see President Kim, I can shout, 'Hey Supreme Leader, Donald Trump is an asshole!'"

2 north korean farmers were working in a field

When all of a sudden they spot 2 grenades in the rice paddy up ahead.
Farmer 1: let us take the grenades to the police in a car
Farmer 2: what if one of them explodes while we are on the way to the police station?
Farmer 1: we tell the police that we found only 1

An American, a South-African and a Korean are on a plane.

After a malfunction in one of the motors, the plane is forced to make an emergency landing. The plane crashes into the ocean, a few hundred metres from a remote island. Only the American, the South-African and the Korean survives.

All three swim to the island, and it quickly becomes clear tha...

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