North Koreans believe they live in the best country in the world because they’re brainwashed by the government and the media.

When every American knows that America is the best country in the world.

I asked my North Korean friend how it was there.

He said he couldn't complain.

Why are North Korean jokes so good?

They have great execution

If Korean pop is K-pop

Then Korean Rap is KRAP.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I was watching porn about a Korean girl and didn’t know which Korean she was from

Until she opened her fridge

Why do North Koreans draw lines so well?

They have a Supreme Ruler.

Why are North Koreans always sad?

Because they are Seoulless

A Korean boy, who is the head chef of a local soup restaurant, is arrested for accusingly spitting in every bowl of soup that’s made and poisoning all of the customers. The other chefs knew about it and didn’t say anything at first, but eventually couldn’t hide it any longer and told the cops.

He is punished to serious, hard work for a month, but he is always upbeat no matter what. So one day the cops decide to see if any one of them can make the boy unhappy. One decides to put the boy’s shoes in a block of cement. The boy doesn’t care, and he just does his work with no shoes. Another dec...

I was watching the Korean remake of Blues Brothers

Yeah, my favourite part was when they do Seoul Man

Korean joke

The number of South Korea's boys band singers is enough to defeat North Korea's entire army.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

How do you call a slutty korean girl ?

Sum Yung-Ho

What do you call a North Korean dictator who produces music on SoundCloud?

Kim Jong Tune

What's a North Korean's Favourite Card Game?

Kim Jong Uno

A guy asks a north korean "what's life like in north Korea?"

North Korean answers "I can't complain"

I'm thinking of opening a Carribean/Korean fusion restaurant

I can call it "Seoul Food"

What is the North Korean equivalent of a Gallon?

One Supreme Litre.

[Pickup line] Are you the Korean peninsula?

Because I'm gonna split you in two

A North Korean Defector

A North Korean defector moves into an apartment in Chicago, and his new neighbor ask what was his apartment back home like.
"Oh it was perfect I couldn't complain " the defector replies.
"What about your job"
"Oh my old job was perfect,I couldn't complain".

"And the food?".
"Oh th...

So a new commander arrives in Korea during the Korean War at the beginning of a Chinese offensive.

So a new commander arrives in Korea at the beginning of the Chinese offensive. Wanting to gain information on the enemy he looks around and asks a Marine,

“what are their tactics, how do they fight?”

The Marine responds,

“Well the Chinese Army likes to attack in very small gro...

Why do North Korean navy boats have glass bottoms

So they can see their Air Force

I recently watched a North Korean horror movie

It turned out to be a documentary.

Why do Koreans have so many popular things?

Aren't they afraid of fans?

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

If Korean Pop is KPop

Is Chinese Rap Crap?

EDIT: I just got on and looked at this post.....
THANK U SO MUCH!!!! This was my first post and it got all the way to the top!! Thank you sooo much!!

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

If Korean pop is kpop, what sort of music does Drake make?

Crap

My dad told me I was listening to way too much Korean Music.

I told him, "K pop"

Why are North Korean literacy rates so high?

Because they have the supreme reader.

Why are North Koreans required to give their books to Kim Jong-un?

Because he is their Supreme Reader

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

If Korean Pop is called K Pop, what do they call Chinese Rap?

CRap

Once the North Korean leader dies, who will take his place?

His next of Kim

North Korea has a new war game

The North Korean state media just announced today that in the event of possible war all citizens are ordered to follow Donald Trump on Twitter, as there’s no way in hell he would risk losing 42 million followers

A Russian, a Mexican, and a Korean all show up to a construction site and get hired.

The boss says that for their first day on the job, the Russian is in charge of concrete, the Mexican is in charge of wood, and the Korean is in charge of supplies.

The boss then leaves and comes back a few hours later to check up on his new workers.

He walks over to the Russian, and al...

My Korean friend died today.

He was So Yung.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A German sits alone in a bar, drinking, when a Korean walks in...

A German sits alone in a bar, drinking his sorrows away when a Korean walks in and sits right next to him. The German lets out a deep sigh in anticipation of the gloating.

Korean guy: “Let’s not talk about soccer, alright?”

The German looks up: “Oh... ok! That would be nice for a chang...

A korean couldn't find his coin, so basically ...

a korean lost a korean won

What do you call a rap group of North Korean defectors?

Run-DMZ

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A Korean man and a Jewish man are in a bar, total strangers to one another.

The Jewish man walks up to the Korean man and, totally unprompted, punches him in the face.

Naturally, the Korean man goes "What was that for?"

The Jewish man responds, "That was for Pearl Harbor."

"Pearl Harbor? That was the Japanese," says the Korean man.

"Ah, Korean,...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A Korean soccer player goes to the doctor

The doctor says "How can I help you?"

"One of my balls is sore and swollen. It's much bigger than the other one."

Doctor: "Show me"

"No, you'll laugh at me."

Doctor: "I see this stuff all the time. Let me have a look."

"Ok but only if you promise not to laugh."
...

I just had this really strong Korean bread.

Tae-kwon-dough

How many North Koreans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A hundred thousand. One to screw in the lightbulb, and the rest for holding the parade.

Why do North Korean police travel in groups of 3?

You need one to read.

You need one to write.

And you need a third to keep an eye on the intellectuals.

A Korean man walked into the currency exchange in New York City with 200,000 Korean won and walked out with $200...

The following week, he walked in with another 200,000 Korean won, and was handed $185. He asked the teller why he got less money that week than the previous week. The teller said , "Three syllables bro: Fluc-tu-ations." The Korean man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and...

What do you call an ancient Korean man?

Jurassic Park

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

On a cold night, during the Korean War, A young lieutenant arrives at a lonely Army camp.....

He was sent to replace the company commander who fell ill. The men greatly liked the old commander and weren't thrilled about getting a new one.. needless to say, the young lieutenant had a hard time fitting in but that didn't stop him from trying.
One night, while doing paper work, he saw severa...

What’s a North Korean’s favorite drink?

A supreme liter

Why are North Korean weekends so lame?

Because theres only one party.

What’s the North Korean leader’s favorite periodic element?

Un un quadium. Then, uranium

What term do you use to refer to a Korean’s brothers/sisters?

Next of Kim

TIL 50% of South Koreans have cataracts.

The other 50% drive Rincolns.

An old Korean saying:

"If the dog is barking, you didn't cook it enough."

What's the difference between North Koreans and Americans?

The Americans had a chance to vote.

Before candles, what did North Korean communists use to light their homes with?

Electricity.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I don't get why Japanese people and South Korean people just can't get along.

I mean, they're all Chinese.

How do you clear a North Korean bingo hall?

B 52

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A North Korean, United States, and Irish Politician walk into a bar.

They all order a beer. Upon going to drink them they notice a fly is floating in each of their beers.

The North Korean politician, outraged, declares war and that he will destroy the bar for allowing this to happen.

The politician from the United States declares tighter sanctions and ...

A Briton, a Frenchman, a Russian and a North Korean . . .

A Briton, a Frenchman, a Russian and a North Korean are standing and staring at a portrait of Adam and Eve . . .

"Look at their calm and reserve," says the Briton. "Surely they must be British!"

"Nonsense," replies the Frenchman, "they are beautiful: surely they must be French!"
...

A Scottish man and his Korean wife take their daughter to the fair...

They walk around enjoying the sights, trying their best to blend in with the crowds. Their daughter sees a stage with a sign for a beauty pageant that says "Open entry, TRUE SCOTS ONLY!"

She drags her parents towards it, wanting to enter. They approach the official, asking how to sign her up ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I was talking to a North Korean about freedom

I told him, "You know what's the best thing about freedom? If I ever see President Trump, I can shout, 'Hey Mr. President, you're an asshole!'"

The North Korean answered, "I have that freedom too. If I ever see President Kim, I can shout, 'Hey Supreme Leader, Donald Trump is an asshole!'"

Why can't North Koreans go to heaven?

Because they don't have a Seoul.

2 north korean farmers were working in a field

When all of a sudden they spot 2 grenades in the rice paddy up ahead.
Farmer 1: let us take the grenades to the police in a car
Farmer 2: what if one of them explodes while we are on the way to the police station?
Farmer 1: we tell the police that we found only 1

What did the South Korean flag holder say to the North Korean holder after the ceremony?

Hey, let's grab some lunch! I bet you're starving!

Trump walks into a North Korean bar

And raises it

Did you know that 80% of Korean businessmen have caddaracts?

The other 20% drive Mercedes

Say what you will about George W Bush, but he wouldn't have stood for North Korean aggression...

He'd have invaded New Zealand by now...

An American, a Briton, and a North Korean look at a picture of Adam and Eve

An American, a Briton, and a North Korean look at a picture of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden and try to figure out what nationality they are.

The American says, "Look at how free and independent they are, they must be Americans."

The Briton says, "What are you talking about, look...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Kim Jong Un asked a well known North Korean composer to create a piece for him

The composer had many months to find people to play, and to write a piece. Once it was performed on stage, it sounded terrible. The players werent synchronized, and they were all playing the wrong notes. That night the composer was set to be executed.

Before the composer was put in the electr...

Why does the north Korean military always march to the left?

Because they have no rights.

An American, a Korean, a Chinese, and a Russian walk into a bar...

...they settled into their seats and when they had loosened up after a few drinks they decided to extol the virtues of their homelands.

"American industry is so superb," said the American. "A sports team can decide to move to a different city, and within a year and a half we can build a stat...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

An Afghan, an Albanian, an Algerian, an American,

an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguans, an Argentine, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Brun...

North Korean missiles can now reach mainland U.S.A...

WE WILL BUILD A ROOF! AND N. KOREA'S GOING TO PAY FOR IT! SAD!

A young Korean couple are lying in bed...

When the guy starts farting nonstop.

The girl, unable to take the smell, says, "Stop, that's disgusting!"

"Don't blame me", the guy says. "It's the dog."

"Oh, don't blame him", she says. "He was cooked perfectly."

A father asks his child, "Could you please stop listening to Korean music?"

"K, pop."

What did Shang Tsung say to the South Korean?

Your Seoul is mine

An American, a South-African and a Korean are on a plane.

After a malfunction in one of the motors, the plane is forced to make an emergency landing. The plane crashes into the ocean, a few hundred metres from a remote island. Only the American, the South-African and the Korean survives.

All three swim to the island, and it quickly becomes clear tha...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A Chinese man walks into a bar and sits right next to a Jewish man.

The Jewish man starts eyeing the Chinese man suspiciously, a dark expression covering his face. Suddenly, with no warning at all, he stands up, grabs the Chinese man by the neck, smashes his face against the bar and throws him to the floor.

The Chinese man, dazed and angry, stands up and con...

So I'm dating this half-Korean girl...

Her mother's Korean, her father's Korean, and her legs got ripped off in a car accident

A North Korean defector arrives at a South Korean hospital in critical condition...

Doctor: "What's this man's name?"

Nurse: "Uh...Oh."

Doctor: "What's wrong?"

Nurse: "Nothing. You asked for his name. He is Oh."

Doctor: "I need his name, not his blood type."

Nurse: "His name is Oh."

Doctor: "Positive?"

Nurse: "Are you doing this on p...

Why is North Korean music so bad?

They've got no Seoul.

Have you tried North Korean food?

Neither have they

What do South Koreans call their spouses?

Seoulmates

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

During the Korean War

My grandfather was deployed to South Korea when North Korea attacked. He was, by all accounts, a terrible gunner. He struggled to hit enemy tanks and even if his shell did hit, as if some curse was upon him, the shell would either be a dud or fail to pierce through the enemy's armour. Despite this, ...

Two South Koreans fell in love with each other...

you might say they found their Seoul mates

What would you call a North Korean news channel?

The Medium.

North Korean launches keep getting better and better

Heck, they even made it to the front page today!