This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguans, an Argentine, an Armenian....

an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodia...

North Koreans believe they live in the best country in the world because they’re brainwashed by the government and the media.

When every American knows that America is the best country in the world.

My dad was Korean and my mom was Mexican

Hi, I am Guacamo Lee

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

So, I've dating a really Sweet Korean girl...

I think she's my Seoul mate.

Edit: First Platinum thank you kind stranger!

Know why North Koreans are so good at measuring stuff?

They have a supreme ruler

Korean meatballs are the best.

In fact they're the dogs bollocks.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

What does Kanye West and the North Korean people have in common?

Both are regularly fucked by Kim.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I was watching porn about a Korean girl and didn’t know which Korean she was from

Until she opened her fridge

Why are North Korean jokes so good?

They have great execution

If Korean pop is K-pop

Then Korean Rap is KRAP.

Why are North Koreans always sad?

Because they are Seoulless

Have you ever had North Korean food?

Neither have the North Koreans.

I asked my North Korean friend how it was there.

He said he couldn't complain.

A Korean boy, who is the head chef of a local soup restaurant, is arrested for accusingly spitting in every bowl of soup that’s made and poisoning all of the customers. The other chefs knew about it and didn’t say anything at first, but eventually couldn’t hide it any longer and told the cops.

He is punished to serious, hard work for a month, but he is always upbeat no matter what. So one day the cops decide to see if any one of them can make the boy unhappy. One decides to put the boy’s shoes in a block of cement. The boy doesn’t care, and he just does his work with no shoes. Another dec...

Korean joke

The number of South Korea's boys band singers is enough to defeat North Korea's entire army.

I was watching the Korean remake of Blues Brothers

Yeah, my favourite part was when they do Seoul Man

Why do Koreans have so many popular things?

Aren't they afraid of fans?

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

How do you call a slutty korean girl ?

Sum Yung-Ho

A guy asks a north korean "what's life like in north Korea?"

North Korean answers "I can't complain"

I'm thinking of opening a Carribean/Korean fusion restaurant

I can call it "Seoul Food"

What is the North Korean equivalent of a Gallon?

One Supreme Litre.

What's a North Korean's Favourite Card Game?

Kim Jong Uno

[Pickup line] Are you the Korean peninsula?

Because I'm gonna split you in two

Why do North Korean navy boats have glass bottoms

So they can see their Air Force

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

If Korean Pop is KPop

Is Chinese Rap Crap?

EDIT: I just got on and looked at this post.....
THANK U SO MUCH!!!! This was my first post and it got all the way to the top!! Thank you sooo much!!

So a new commander arrives in Korea during the Korean War at the beginning of a Chinese offensive.

So a new commander arrives in Korea at the beginning of the Chinese offensive. Wanting to gain information on the enemy he looks around and asks a Marine,

“what are their tactics, how do they fight?”

The Marine responds,

“Well the Chinese Army likes to attack in very small gro...

North Korea has a new war game

The North Korean state media just announced today that in the event of possible war all citizens are ordered to follow Donald Trump on Twitter, as there’s no way in hell he would risk losing 42 million followers

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

If Korean pop is kpop, what sort of music does Drake make?

Crap

Why are North Koreans required to give their books to Kim Jong-un?

Because he is their Supreme Reader

A North Korean Defector

A North Korean defector moves into an apartment in Chicago, and his new neighbor ask what was his apartment back home like.
"Oh it was perfect I couldn't complain " the defector replies.
"What about your job"
"Oh my old job was perfect,I couldn't complain".

"And the food?".
"Oh th...

My dad told me I was listening to way too much Korean Music.

I told him, "K pop"

A Russian, a Mexican, and a Korean all show up to a construction site and get hired.

The boss says that for their first day on the job, the Russian is in charge of concrete, the Mexican is in charge of wood, and the Korean is in charge of supplies.

The boss then leaves and comes back a few hours later to check up on his new workers.

He walks over to the Russian, and al...

Why are North Korean literacy rates so high?

Because they have the supreme reader.

Once the North Korean leader dies, who will take his place?

His next of Kim

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A Korean man and a Jewish man are in a bar, total strangers to one another.

The Jewish man walks up to the Korean man and, totally unprompted, punches him in the face.

Naturally, the Korean man goes "What was that for?"

The Jewish man responds, "That was for Pearl Harbor."

"Pearl Harbor? That was the Japanese," says the Korean man.

"Ah, Korean,...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

If Korean Pop is called K Pop, what do they call Chinese Rap?

CRap

What do you call North Korean K-Pop?

Propaganda Style.

I recently watched a North Korean horror movie

It turned out to be a documentary.

Why is the North Korean dictator so evil?

Because he has no Seoul.

My Korean friend died today.

He was So Yung.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A German sits alone in a bar, drinking, when a Korean walks in...

A German sits alone in a bar, drinking his sorrows away when a Korean walks in and sits right next to him. The German lets out a deep sigh in anticipation of the gloating.

Korean guy: “Let’s not talk about soccer, alright?”

The German looks up: “Oh... ok! That would be nice for a chang...

A korean couldn't find his coin, so basically ...

a korean lost a korean won

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A Korean soccer player goes to the doctor

The doctor says "How can I help you?"

"One of my balls is sore and swollen. It's much bigger than the other one."

Doctor: "Show me"

"No, you'll laugh at me."

Doctor: "I see this stuff all the time. Let me have a look."

"Ok but only if you promise not to laugh."
...

How many North Koreans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A hundred thousand. One to screw in the lightbulb, and the rest for holding the parade.

Why do North Korean police travel in groups of 3?

You need one to read.

You need one to write.

And you need a third to keep an eye on the intellectuals.

A Korean man walked into the currency exchange in New York City with 200,000 Korean won and walked out with $200...

The following week, he walked in with another 200,000 Korean won, and was handed $185. He asked the teller why he got less money that week than the previous week. The teller said , "Three syllables bro: Fluc-tu-ations." The Korean man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and...

What do you call an ancient Korean man?

Jurassic Park

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

On a cold night, during the Korean War, A young lieutenant arrives at a lonely Army camp.....

He was sent to replace the company commander who fell ill. The men greatly liked the old commander and weren't thrilled about getting a new one.. needless to say, the young lieutenant had a hard time fitting in but that didn't stop him from trying.
One night, while doing paper work, he saw severa...

What’s a North Korean’s favorite drink?

A supreme liter

TIL 50% of South Koreans have cataracts.

The other 50% drive Rincolns.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A North Korean, United States, and Irish Politician walk into a bar.

They all order a beer. Upon going to drink them they notice a fly is floating in each of their beers.

The North Korean politician, outraged, declares war and that he will destroy the bar for allowing this to happen.

The politician from the United States declares tighter sanctions and ...

What’s the North Korean leader’s favorite periodic element?

Un un quadium. Then, uranium

What term do you use to refer to a Korean’s brothers/sisters?

Next of Kim

An old Korean saying:

"If the dog is barking, you didn't cook it enough."

Why are North Korean weekends so lame?

Because theres only one party.

What's the difference between North Koreans and Americans?

The Americans had a chance to vote.

Before candles, what did North Korean communists use to light their homes with?

Electricity.

How do you clear a North Korean bingo hall?

B 52

A Briton, a Frenchman, a Russian and a North Korean . . .

A Briton, a Frenchman, a Russian and a North Korean are standing and staring at a portrait of Adam and Eve . . .

"Look at their calm and reserve," says the Briton. "Surely they must be British!"

"Nonsense," replies the Frenchman, "they are beautiful: surely they must be French!"
...

Why can't North Koreans find true love ?

Because they just can't find a Seoul-mate !

Say what you will about George W Bush, but he wouldn't have stood for North Korean aggression...

He'd have invaded New Zealand by now...

Did you know that 80% of Korean businessmen have caddaracts?

The other 20% drive Mercedes

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I was talking to a North Korean about freedom

I told him, "You know what's the best thing about freedom? If I ever see President Trump, I can shout, 'Hey Mr. President, you're an asshole!'"

The North Korean answered, "I have that freedom too. If I ever see President Kim, I can shout, 'Hey Supreme Leader, Donald Trump is an asshole!'"

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I don't get why Japanese people and South Korean people just can't get along.

I mean, they're all Chinese.

What do you call a North Korean who isn't sure what to say?

Kim Jon Um...

An American, a Briton, and a North Korean look at a picture of Adam and Eve

An American, a Briton, and a North Korean look at a picture of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden and try to figure out what nationality they are.

The American says, "Look at how free and independent they are, they must be Americans."

The Briton says, "What are you talking about, look...

A Scottish man and his Korean wife take their daughter to the fair...

They walk around enjoying the sights, trying their best to blend in with the crowds. Their daughter sees a stage with a sign for a beauty pageant that says "Open entry, TRUE SCOTS ONLY!"

She drags her parents towards it, wanting to enter. They approach the official, asking how to sign her up ...

2 north korean farmers were working in a field

When all of a sudden they spot 2 grenades in the rice paddy up ahead.
Farmer 1: let us take the grenades to the police in a car
Farmer 2: what if one of them explodes while we are on the way to the police station?
Farmer 1: we tell the police that we found only 1

What did the South Korean flag holder say to the North Korean holder after the ceremony?

Hey, let's grab some lunch! I bet you're starving!

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

An Asian man and a Jewish man walk into a bar

The Asian man goes: “Hi, my name is Joe Chan, what’s yours?”

The Jew replies: “Michael Goldberg... Hey you know, I never did forget you Koreans for Pearl Harbor.”

The Asian man, surprised, replies:
“Uhhh... Pearl Harbor was done by the Japanese, not Koreans, and I’m Chinese.”
...

Why does the north Korean military always march to the left?

Because they have no rights.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Kim Jong Un asked a well known North Korean composer to create a piece for him

The composer had many months to find people to play, and to write a piece. Once it was performed on stage, it sounded terrible. The players werent synchronized, and they were all playing the wrong notes. That night the composer was set to be executed.

Before the composer was put in the electr...

So I'm dating this half-Korean girl...

Her mother's Korean, her father's Korean, and her legs got ripped off in a car accident

An American, a Korean, a Chinese, and a Russian walk into a bar...

...they settled into their seats and when they had loosened up after a few drinks they decided to extol the virtues of their homelands.

"American industry is so superb," said the American. "A sports team can decide to move to a different city, and within a year and a half we can build a stat...

A father asks his child, "Could you please stop listening to Korean music?"

"K, pop."

An American, a South-African and a Korean are on a plane.

After a malfunction in one of the motors, the plane is forced to make an emergency landing. The plane crashes into the ocean, a few hundred metres from a remote island. Only the American, the South-African and the Korean survives.

All three swim to the island, and it quickly becomes clear tha...

North Korean missiles can now reach mainland U.S.A...

WE WILL BUILD A ROOF! AND N. KOREA'S GOING TO PAY FOR IT! SAD!

What do you call a South Korean rapper?

Seoulja boy

A young Korean couple are lying in bed...

When the guy starts farting nonstop.

The girl, unable to take the smell, says, "Stop, that's disgusting!"

"Don't blame me", the guy says. "It's the dog."

"Oh, don't blame him", she says. "He was cooked perfectly."

Why is North Korean music so bad?

They've got no Seoul.

What did Shang Tsung say to the South Korean?

Your Seoul is mine

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

During the Korean War

My grandfather was deployed to South Korea when North Korea attacked. He was, by all accounts, a terrible gunner. He struggled to hit enemy tanks and even if his shell did hit, as if some curse was upon him, the shell would either be a dud or fail to pierce through the enemy's armour. Despite this, ...

What do South Koreans call their spouses?

Seoulmates

North Korean launches keep getting better and better

Heck, they even made it to the front page today!