UPJOKE
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Which US president featured in sci-fi movies?

Ronald Ray Gun.

As Governor of California, Arnold Schwarzenegger had to attend many high society functions. One such function was a fund raiser which featured a symphony orchestra playing a medley of pieces by famous composers.

Arnie, as is well known, has only one preference when it comes to classical composers, but sat patiently during the performance.

There were selections by Bach, Beethoven, Mozart, Tchaikovsky and more.

The Governor began to get quite perturbed when, after over an hour and half, his favo...

I got featured on r/woosh!

I still don't know why..

Yo mama is so fat.

Her weight loss program was featured on: Top 10 failed megaprojects.

Which motor vehicle was prominently featured in the Bible?

Honda, because the apostles were all in one Accord.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Jesus Christ was featured on a recent episode of Hoarders

Apparently, his saving really got out of control!

Why wasn't Taco Bell featured at the White House's fast food feast?

Because Trump would have expected them to pay for the whole meal.

DJ Khaled was featured in a Weight Watchers commercial for losing weight...

...He must have stopped eating out...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dear Madam, Thank you for the order at the Sex Toy Shop,

You asked for the big red that is featured on our wall. Please re-select, that is our fire extinguisher.
Sincerely.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My wife and I were featured on Extreme Couponing last year.

Our episode of Hoarders airs next week!

What instruments should be featured in a rogue AI's music band?

Just Harmonika

Daredevil was planned to be featured of Age of Ultron but..........

He had issues with Vision, you see.

Banta the Furniture dealer



Banta, a furniture dealer from Ludhiana, decided to Expand the line of furniture in his store, so he decided to go to Chennai to see what he could find.


After arriving in Chennai he met with some manufacturers and selected a line that he thought would sell well Back home in Lud...

America failed No Nut November,

This election featured the two biggest nuts in recent US history.

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