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Series Jokes

A Book Series Never Written…

“The Assignment Chronicles”

* Book 1 written by Ken U. Duitt

* Book 2 written by Noah Kent

* Book 3 written by Nora Cannai

* Book 4 written by May Neether

* Book 5 written by Al Trayet

* Book 6 written by Cole Laktiv-Raleif

"All right, for our new Disney+ miniseries, we need to make it a thoughtful, highly entertaining original series AND it needs to connect to an existing Star Wars property."

"... Would you settle for And/or?"

Most characters in the Harry Potter series were represented well in their transition from book to movie;

But Nearly Headless Nick was poorly executed.

Netflix is releasing a new series on the life of Abraham Lincoln.

The finale will be shot before a live audience.

Ohio is stealing my life story

A series of train wrecks in an already depressed area

I just opened up a gym where my entire staff asks you a series of annoying questions every so often for the length of your stay.

Welcome to Jehovah's Fitness.

Did you ever hear that joke about Taylor series?

I don’t remember it exactly, but I can tell it pretty close.

I found the first four books of the Harry Potter series to be quite lighthearted.

But the fifth one—-dead Sirius.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy goes to see his doctor

The doctor, as per routine, asks, "What brings you in today?"

The guy sighs and says, "My penis is orange."

The doctor looks up from his chart, slightly confused and askes, "Is that a metaphor or...."

The guy stops him and says, "No, doctor. My dick is bright orange."

Eve...

Shortest TV series

Breaking Bad (Canada version)

A patient in a psychiatric hospital is being examined by a shrink. The shrink hands him a piece of paper and asks him, "Look at this inkblot and tell me what do you see."

"Well," the patient says, "I'm not 100% sure, but it looks like Rorschach Series IV, blot #17."

Warner Bros should create a Harry Potter spinoff series based on the life of Hermione Granger.

They should name it Granger Things.

Did you hear about the Netflix series Summer to Winter?

It never got a 5th season.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A series of jokes because I never see the full set

Why are elephants so good at hiding in trees?

Because you never see them.

How do they hide in cherry trees?

They paint their balls red and climb up

What's the loudest sound in the Savannah?

A giraffe eating cherries.

So Marvel and Ikea decided to do a crossover series. Marvel replaced the "Suit up" catchphrase with...

..."Avengers Assemble".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a bar...

He sits down at the counter and starts getting himself really good and drunk. Like, properly pissed. After a while, he feels a certain heaviness in his colon, so he calls over the bartender.

"'Scuse me," he asks blearily. "Where's the bathroom?"

"Oh, it's right down the hall!" the bart...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Mee and my girlfriend wanted to see a series on Netflix...

She told me she wanted to see Vampire Diary, but I wanted to see La Casa De Papel so I told her "Fine, who ever has the biggest penis gets to choose whatever series they want."



So yea Vampire Diary is a nice show after all

What's your favorite pickup line?

For me, it's the Ford F series.

David Benioff and Dan Weiss wrote this joke for the loyal viewers of the Game of Thrones series

Season 8

They are making the next series of Walking Dead in Greece

It’s a total zombie Acropolis.

Here's one for those born before the 1980's...

The chief of a large Western African tribe flew into London for a state visit and was being interviewed.

“Welcome to our country, Your Excellency,” said one reporter. “Did you have a good flight?”

The Chief made a strange series of sounds – bells, whistles, hisses, pings in no apparen...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The National Anthem

A drunk guy’s watching the World Series at the bar. The game hasn’t even started and the dude’s already pretty wasted. They just finished singing the National Anthem when the guy says to the bartender, “I betcha $500 I can fart the National Anthem.”

The bartender seeing some easy money take...

Wikipedia suggests the third oldest joke in the world has a missing punchline. I’d like to suggest that Reddit’s most upvoted punchline is the true punchline

From the history segment on the Wikipedia article for joke.

The tale of the three ox drivers from Adab completes the three known oldest jokes in the world. This is a comic triple dating back to 1200 BC Adab. It concerns three men seeking justice from a king on the matter of ownership over a ...

I have a few questions about the Buck Rogers TV series from 1979.

Never mind. I'll check Twikipedia.

Netflix announced it will be producing another 4 part docu-series on epilepsy

Don't miss the all new seiz'n

Dear Sir, On behalf of Channel Four may I thank you for your application submitted on behalf of your wife for our new reality show

Also the charming photograph you enclosed. Whilst agreeing that she could make a worthy contribution to the program if selected, I would point out that the correct title of the series is actually "Fact Hunt".

Kind regards
Channel Four.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Horse and Chicken

are farmyard pals and take daily walks around a large farmyard. One day after a particularly heavy rainfall, horse takes a miss step and falls into a large hole in the ground. Unable to get out, horse panics and whineys to chicken for help. Chicken realises he's not up to help, rushes off to the far...

Did you hear about that new Netflix series about a chemistry teacher that finds out he has cancer and secretly opens a bakery to provide for his family when he's gone?

It's called Baking Bread.

They are making a TV series about the struggles of menstruating women over the years.

It is a period drama.

Smokey the Bear was relaxing in his new house.

He'd just moved to the neighborhood, and was enjoying retirement after years of working for the U.S. Forest Service. He was sitting in his favorite easy chair, reading a particularly engaging book, when the doorbell rang.

Smokey sighed, set the book face down (his sister was always so mad at ...

An astronaut lands on an alien world.

Once upon a time an astronaut landed on an alien world. The world was full of trees and plants and wildlife. But one species in particular caught his eye. Short and round with huge feet, they were kind. They sang songs all day, drank, and made merry. After observing them from afar for many days, the...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests...

The last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset. Upon making several false alarm trips to the bathroom, he figured that the latest episode was just that, so he stayed put.

Suddenly, however, he filled his bed with diarrhea and was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rationa...

In the Cars movie series, they have a place called Radiator Springs.

Now, radiators are vital components in cars, so I find it's a very weird name decision for a city.

Its like calling a human city "Liver pool".

Quarantine is like a Netflix series

When you think it’s over, another season gets released

In the Resident Evil series, how does one make a proper Jill Sandwich?

You put it between two slices of Breadfield and then add some Weskershire sauce.

A fourth grade biology teacher is asking a series of questions to her students

Eventually she asks "What part of the body can grow ten times its normal size when stimulated?"

As soon as she asks that, a girl at the back of the class stands up and yells "EWW, THAT'S SO GROSS. HOW DARE YOU ASK THIS TO SMALL CHILDREN? I'M GOING TO TELL MY MOTHER ALL ABOUT THIS", then storm...

Mu favorite series of riddles when i was in high school. Hope you all like it as much as i did <3

Give 3 steps to put an elephant in a refrigerator.
i.Open the refrigerator
ii.Put the elephant in
iii.Close it

AND THEN ASK

Give 4 steps to put a giraffe in the refrigerator.
i.Open the refrigerator
ii.Take the elephant out
iii.Put the giraffe in
iv.Close it
...

Did everyone hear about the new Beastie Boys documentary coming to Netflix?

The 5-part series will release parts A through D this winter. Upon completion, viewers are required to fight for their right to part E.

Series of jokes translated from Armenian

Some context: Abaran is a city in Armenia, and there's this stereotype about the "Abarantsi" (person from Abaran) who is supposed to be stupid and there's a bunch of jokes about it, kind of like blonde jokes (this is all for the sake of the joke, however, and we love and respect the people of Abaran...

A man sentenced to death is asked

- What is your last wish?
- To watch the "Young and the Restless" series complete with commercials.

John Cleese Joke ..

The U.S. Postal service created a series of commemorative stamps commemorating lawyers, but they had to withdraw them within a couple of weeks because people couldn't figure out which side of the stamp to spit on.

They're playing with the largest deck of cards ever at this year's World Series of Poker.

It's a pretty big deal.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It’s been alleged that I’ve written a series of tweets about the song “I’m Too Sexy”.

I’d like to reassure my followers that I did not write said thread...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Some people are saying the President had "a series of mini-strokes"

I'm not sure if they're talking about his golf game or how he masturbates.

Why are lights in a series more loyal than lights in parallel?

If one goes down in a series, they all go down with it.

Never thought Netflix would produce an award-winning series watched by tens of millions around the world. But hey...

Stranger Things have happened.

What do cubs fans do after they win the world series?

They turn off their Xbox.

I didn’t get the Xbox Series X I wanted for my birthday.

I need someone to console me.

Dark humor xD

A husband got called into a hospital. His wife's just had a really bad car accident... He's pacing nervously in waiting hall expecting the doctor to come out of the OR. Finally the doctor comes out.

- 'How is she, doctor?'
- 'Well, she's alive... and that's good news. But there is some bad...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Professor of Logic: Norm Macdonald

Just the other week I had someone move next to me. Original neighbor died of cancer about a three month ago. So as the great neighbor I am I go to greet my new neighbor I say “Hey there uhh neighbor just dropping by to say hello, say what do you do for a living?”

He says “Nice to meet you. Im...

That World Series game was so long...

When it started Kevin Spacey was still a respected actor.

I heard that Justin Timberlake will be doing one of the voices in the new dark crystal series

He’s bringing skeksis back

I want to start watching the news

But its so far into the series. I feel like Ill never catch up

What racing series do rappers compete in?

NasCar

What do you call someone who tells you that you must see the new Star Wars series?

A Mandatorian

So I'm making a TV series about a plane hijacking..

We've just shot the pilot.

Me - "Shall I buy the PS5 or the Xbox Series X?"

Wife - "I'd rather you buy an Eggs Box £3.60"


Lol my wife actually said this and I thought it was so dumb, it made me chuckle and that I thought I'd share it here.

A long series of jokes

503 bricks are on a plane. 1 falls off. How many are left?

_502._

How do you put an elephant in a fridge?

_Open door, put elephant in, close door._

How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?

_Open door, take elephant out, put giraffe in, close door._

The Lion K...

I got a recommendation from Pops on a TV series to watch

After watching it I can say it indeed was a jolly good show

The new X Box Series or PS5 should have a CD stacker installed.

It would be a real game changer

A trans woman took her artwork to an art constat.

It was a series of lifelike paintings and sculptures of catholic nuns, done using only the best of materials. There were a lot of good entries to be sure, but every one she entered, she won easily.

When the judges were asked why they all couldn't help but give her gold, they answered,
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My Dr wanted to run a series of tests and said he would need a blood sample, a stool sample, a urine sample and a semen sample.

So I left him my underwear.

I’m making a documentary series about how to fly planes.

I'm currently filming the pilot.

I'm thinking of making a series of non-gloss self portrait dinner placemats

I'll name it My Multitude of Matte Mats of Matt by Matt

two farmers are talking

and one is lamenting to the other.

"man, I've got all these female cows and no male bulls to breed with them. It's gonna cost me a fortune to rent bulls!"

the other farmer responds, "don't sweat it joe, I've got tons of bulls so tomorrow, pack your cows up in your truck and drive them...

On a scale of 1 to 10, how obsessed with the Harry Potter Series am I?

9 3/4

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A series of tuba jokes

What is a tuba for?

1 1/2" x 3 1/2".

How do you fix a broke tuba?

With a tuba glue.

What do you call ten tubas at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start.

What do you call an arrogant tuba player?

A brasshole.

What's the difference between God an...

I own a series of vending macines

You know, in parks and stuff, you can get a coke, ginger ale, fanta, etc.

Business was going really well, so well I had to hire a guy to help. Right after I hired him though, sales plummeted.

Trying to figure out why, I went to a few of my macines. The snacks were fine, but the drin...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Everyone hates a filler episode in a TV series.

But in porn, well that’s a different story.

All the avatar has done is complain about the youngsters since his return, so the new series is now called

Boomer Aang

But at least he is back!

(This is seriously what insomnia does to a guys already fading sanity).

My friend told me that avengers endgame is twenty second film in the series.

It sure felt longer than that.

Samsung just announced a series of water resistant phones....

Just what you want in a phone that sets itself on fire - to be water resistant.

I haven’t watched the Epstein docu-series on Netflix but I already know the ending.

He didn’t kill himself.

Dark (Netflix Series)

I showed it to my daughter

.

.

.

.

.

Now is she is my mother.

PS: it was a comment on YouTube, i laughed pretty hard at it, thought i should share.

What was the only Nintendo series to really fall flat?

Paper Mario

My 85-year-old grandfather was rushed to the hospital with a possible concussion.

**The doctor asked him a series of questions: “Do you know where you are?” “I’m at Rex Hospital.” “What city are you in?” “Raleigh.” “Do you know who I am?” “Dr. Hamilton.” My grandfather then turned to the nurse and said, “I hope he doesn’t ask me any more questions.” “Why?” she asked. “Because all...

A new monk arrived at the monastery. He was assigned to help the other monks in copying a series of old texts by hand. He noticed, however, that they were copying copies, not the original books. The new monk went to the head monk to ask him about this. He pointed out that if there were an error in t

The head monk said: “We have been copying from the copies for centuries, but you make a good point, my son.”

The head monk went down into the cellar with one of the copies to check it against the original. Hours later, nobody had seen him, so one of the monks went downstairs to look for him. ...

I Started Watching A New Series During Lockdown

It's a series about how a respiratory illness spread throughout the world in 2019 and 2020, and damaged many economies, as well as caused many people to lose their lives...the illness is even said to have originated in China. Despite similarities, the writers say it's not based on the novel, *Corona...

So, one of my friends was talking about the Dune series yesterday

He mentions a guy who gets an STD that turns him into a fat slug person.

I called him "Jabba the Nut."

The director of the "Guardians of the Galaxy" series will not be making the third part

I guess Disney really knows how to fire a Gunn

I'm reading this awesome book series on invincible dogs!

I can't put 'em down!

What would be the title of the TV series covering 'The Last Supper'?

Breaking Bread.

A series of dots and dashes is Morse code.

A series of sobs and tears is re-Morse code.

If they release three more sequels of 'Fast and Furious' series...

They should name the last one - "Fast10 - Your Seatbelt" in memory of Paul Walker.

What do you call the first episode of a TV series with a predominantly black cast?

A pilot, you racist

Whats the most unrealistic part of the Harry Potter series?

That a ginger has two friends at school

NBC is contemplating a new TV series titled "Airline Tragedies."

They are putting the pilot together right now.

If there was a television series about a Deadhead surgeon, what would it be called?

A: Touch Of Grey's Anatomy.

The moment the Washington Nationals won the World Series

Was absolutely briceless.

There's been a series of senseless killings near my home this week.

The victims were all deaf, dumb or blind

I could get to the second floor using the stairs or I could use a structure consisting of a series of bars or steps between two upright length of wood, metal, or rope.

I chose the ladder.

I'm glad the Astros won the World Series

The people of Houston have waded so long for this.

Why do all the Apple series start with “i”

Because you’re the Apple of my i

For the first time in their franchise history the Washington National’s are World Series champions

Scherzer threw his glove out of the way and everybody started crowding the mound, jumping up and down with pure joy. Man the expressions on their faces were completely Bryceless!

After tonight's World Series game...

It looks like the Indians are going to have a different type of trail of tears.

Subscribe (Verb) - to obtain or have a subscription to a publication, concert series, service, etc.

Subscribe (Noun) - a very obedient writer

What is a dermatologist's favorite aspect of the Harry Potter series?

Quit-itch

What is the difference between a polar bear and the World Series?

One has cubs

Daddy, do all fairy tales start with Once upon a time?

No dear, there’s a whole series of fairly tales that start with “If elected, I promise”.

So a GMO scientist, after a successful series of test results, turns to his lab mates to congratulate them and say

"You're the team of the crop"

If the current Russian president is preparing to lead a series of swift military offensives...

...does that mean he's Putin on a blitz?

Star Trek Discovery is going to have a female lead which will ruin the series.

The male captains wandered around aimlessly getting into trouble.

She will just ask for directions and head straight to the destination.

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