This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Harry Potter has way too many characters...

Even J.K. Rowling has a hard time keeping all the characters straight.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I asked my wife to dress as my favourite Star Wars character for some sexy birthday fun

I walked into the bedroom that night and I was shocked,

"Love, Jabba the Hut is not my favourite Star Wars character" I exclaimed,

"Fuck off" She shouted "I haven't got dressed yet"

Bloody Passwords

PASSWORD PROBLEMS:

WINDOWS: Please enter your new password.

USER: cabbage


WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.

USER: boiled cabbage



WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.
...

My parents read the book I was writing. They said the main character wasn't likable.

It was an autobiography...

A blonde's office computer had technical issues

IT support came over to the desk and said he needed password to access her account.

"It's 'MickeyMinnieBatmanSupergirlWonderwomanLondon'" she replied.

"A bit unusual for a password, how did you come up with it?" the support dude asked.

She went "Because computer said the passwor...

Why is gaston the smartest disney character?

He won a no-belle prize

Which fictional character would you totally bang?

your girlfriend

Going to the dentist is like those movies where a character gets interrogated violently.

It’s pretty clear to them when you’re lying — and if you don’t come clean, you might lose a tooth.

Iron Man is a very confusing character.

I know he’s a guy but he could’ve been Fe Male.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Although I wouldn't say it's a major character flaw,

my premature ejaculation is certainly a shortcominng.

Which Star Wars character is always sneezing?

Atchoo-bacca.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

"Have you ever broken up with someone over a single character flaw?"

My ex-girlfriend and I were a perfect match.

Like Batman and Robin.

Only we didn’t solve crimes and the tight, latex outfits we owned were used in the bedroom and not on the streets.

I truly thought she was the one.

But she had one character flaw that proved too great to ...

Which cartoon character curses the most?

The Road Runner

At the beginning of Naruto, the three main characters existed in a 'love square'.

Naruto loves Sakura, Sakura loves Sasuke, Sasuke loves nobody, and nobody loves Naruto.

Busrides are good for your character.

They keep you grounded

All of the Undertale characters had a big orgy...

But nobody came.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

There's a new exhibit at disneyworld that features statues of some disney favorite characters.

A tour guide is leading guests through the exhibit as they pass such favorites as Mickey and Minnie Mouse, Donald Duck, Goofy, as well as Pluto. As they're going through they pass a statue that's in the shape of a giant turd. Puzzled, one of the guests pipes up and asks the tour guide, "what's the d...

Why is Punisher the funniest Marvel character?

Because he has the best punchlines.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Why do characters in books and movies always prefer walking or running down hills?

Because Rowling makes them gay.

I love Harry Potter but after re-reading the chapter the death-day party I realized something about nearly headless nick

He was a very poorly executed character

The blonde's password

During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password: "MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento"
When asked why such a long password, she said she was told that it had to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital.

Which GoT character has the most handles?

King of the Andals.

Is Goose from Captain Marvel a good character?

You're flerken right he is.

The media keeps trying to assassinate the character of Donald Trump and I think it is a waste of time...

You can't assassinate what isn't there.

My Girlfriend has been repeatedly asking me “Are you a character from Alice in Wonderland?” and it’s getting really annoying

My Friend asked me “Are you mad at her?”

I replied “Don’t you start too”

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I saw an anime character propose.

Yeah, I saw him get on his Japaknees.

A larger-than-life character, Big Tony, walks into a bar.

Big Tony orders a drink. He bellows out, "when Big Tony drinks, everybody drinks!" The patrons of the bar all rush to get served their favorite tipple.

Then he orders some food. "When Big Tony eats, everybody eats!" Suddenly the kitchen is overwhelmed.

He places a twenty on the bar, an...

What do you call a bookworm who can't get enough of strong female characters?

A heroine addict!

Who is the most misogynistic Super Smash Brothers character?

Inceleroar.

Where do the Game of Thrones characters go to get their clothing pressed?

The Iron Islands.
...I'm so sorry, I've been re-watching the entire series in preparation for April and this stupid joke popped into my head after my Mum bought a new iron :3

People say that Rorschach from Watchmen is a great character.

But I don’t really know what people see in him.

You know who was the main character in the movie about drugs?

The heroin.

What makes LGBT game characters unique from other characters?

they don’t shoot in a straight line

I needed a password with 8 characters

I used "Snow White and the Seven Dwarves"

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

[OC] In Japan, Hello Kitty is a highly respected character

That's why they call it "Herro Kitty"

Which Star Wars character is obsessed with cheese?

Boba Feta.

How many Dragon Ball Z characters does it take to change a lightbulb?

1, but it’s gonna take about 5 episodes.

R2D2 is the most obscene character in film history

They had to beep out every word he said

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

So as some of you probably already heard Overwatch character Soldier 76 was confirmed to be a gay.

His voiceline *"Well, all that stuff they pumped into me has to be good for something."* did not age well though.

We should have an orgy with all the Dr. Seuss characters

Whos with me

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Stan Lee wrote Tony Stark as a character with a sexual identity crisis.

He's all man, but likes to dress as FEmale

Anytime I watch a Jennifer Anniston movie, it seems like she’s playing the same character.

She is a victim of Rachel profiling.

One of Roald Dahl's characters gained weight and started writing rap music.

Notorious BFG.

The Pentagon is changing the nuclear codes to over 140 characters

So Trump can't tweet it

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

No matter what sexual role play idea my wife decides on, I always have to play the same character.

The husband who is out of town.

Marvel kills half of your favorite characters

Nintendo kills %99.9 of them

A blonde came up to the librarian and yelled, "This book sucks! There's way too many characters and the story makes no sense!"

The librarian said, "So you're the one who took our phone book."

How do you make love to a nursery rhyme character?

You hump-ty-dumpty

Why is Spongebob the main character

When Patrick is clearly the star?

What is Donald Trump's favorite fictional character?

Wall-E

I sure like that my car insurance requires a 10 character password.

I sure would hate it if someone ..... paid my car insurance?

Where do My Hero Academia characters keep their Yu-Gi-Oh cards?

A DEKU box!

I’ve always tried to hold my breath when a character is under water, to see if I could survive the situation

Finding Nemo was a tough one

How can you tell if you're actually just a character in a Marvel movie?

At some point you'll randomly bump into Stan Lee.

What's the difference between the Game of Thrones books and a Chinese newspaper?

To understand everything in a Chinese newspaper you only need to know about 3,000 characters.

What happens to Minecraft characters when they turn 16?

They grow cubic hair!

Every time a character in a TV Show says “another round please” they’re immediately handed a drink by an attentive bartender.

But every time I do it all they say is:

“For the last time, I’m not a bartender. This is planned parenthood. You need to leave.”

Like okay! I get it I’m not rich and famous!

Man: "I've always had this absurd feeling that I'm a cartoon character"

Psychologist: "That's a rather unusual mental state... How long have you felt this way?"

Man: "Ever since I was an outline..."

How many dragon Ball characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

.
.
.
One, but it takes 12 episodes.

*twisting slowly*
Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.......

Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee......

A few numbers were on a field trip (dont mind my character choice)....

...when they stopped to admire the view and take a rest for a bit.

Four, being a good painter, decides to spend the break by painting some things. But instead of painting the view, he paints the beautiful pickup truck they have been riding on.

After he finished, he realized how well ma...

A woman sues a man for defamation of character...

A woman sues a man for defamation of character, charging that he called her a pig. The man is found guilty and made to pay damages.

After the trial, he asks the judge, “Does this mean that I can no longer call Ms. Harding a pig?”

The judge says,“That is correct.”

“And does it m...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I’ve got a porn parody idea for Lord of the Rings. The main character.....

Dildo Gaggins

Video Games need to start thinking outside the box when it comes to in-game character names...

I'm getting real sick and tired of always protecting some girl named Ally.

Why is there no black character in the game clue?

Because it would be called solved

Who is the most cosplayed character?

Santa Claus

My son Anakin loves that I named all of our children after Star Wars characters

My daughter Chewbacca, however, is less thrilled.

My house is haunted by Nintendo characters.

I knew I shouldn't have fooled around with that Luigi board.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I had a job interview earlier today and the boss asked me, “What would you say is one of your biggest character flaws?”

I said, ‘Well I can be brutally honest at times.’ And the boss said, “No way! I think that’s a wonderful asset actually.”

And I said, ‘I really don’t give a fuck what you think.’

Cupid would be a more believable character...

...if the people he shot rushed into marriage rather than fell in love

Which character in Game of thrones has a healthy digestive system

Bran

One of my players only plays lawful good female characters

I think he might have a heroine addiction.

What Bible character didn’t have a father?

Joshua, son of Nun.

What do you call a furry that sometimes cosplays as star wars characters?

Ani-Kin

A video game character walks into a health bar...

... and he remarks "that's the fourth wall I've walked into today!"

I miss the days when the Annoying Orange was just a fictional youtube character

And not the President of the United States.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Which Star Wars character would always sneak off set for a cheeky masturbating session?

Obi Wan Kernobi.

What kind of character does J-Roc wish was in Dragonball Z?

Gnome Saiyan

What did the Oblivion character say when he saw a molecule of magnesium sulphate?

BY THE NINE DIVINES! A SALT!

Why did the characters from Fifty Shades of Grey get into a fight about fast food?

They couldn't agree where to go. Christian wanted Domino's, but Ana insisted on Subway!

Aaron Paul prefers to stay in character even when the cameras aren't rolling

It's called methead acting

I just read the bible, really good book. Had a lot of character development

In my opinion, the Noah Arc was the best part

I like to hold my breath whenever a character goes underwater in a movie. That way I know if I'd survive if I were that character.

I was rushed to the E.R after Finding Nemo

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Professor X to JK Rowling:

Professor X: "What's your power?"

JK Rowling: "I can rewrite the past of fictional characters."

Gay Professor X: "Interesting."

There's a new keyboard shortcut in GTA V which if you press it will cause your character to kill minorities.

Alt-right

My life is like going to see a M. Night Shyamalan film....bizarre characters, lots of plot twists

and I want my money back.

Star Wars was originally supposed to be an R-rated movie on account of one characters dialogue,

But luckily they bleeped all R2-D2's lines out.

Did you hear about the RPG fan who keeps making female characters and re-doing their stats?

He respecs women.

I was asked who my favourite X-Men character was..

Caitlin jenner was apparently not an appropriate answer

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

(Nsfw) Which Pixar character is the worst one to have sex with?

Walle because he nuts and bolts.

How many 'Dragonball Z' characters does it take to change a lightbulb?

All of them-over a six episode arc.



But Goku is the one to screw it in after mastering transformation into a Super Sayin Electrician.

Does anyone know of a good character encoding standard that I can give to someone I care about?

ASCII for a friend.

Who Is Jay Gatsby's Favorite Comic Book Character?

Deadpool.

I hate it when characters come back to life in fiction...

It really removes some tension from the book. That's why I didn't like the bible.