I tried to make an ABBA cover band using entirely woodwind

Unfortunately, the world just wasn't ready for OBBO.

What do you call a country that is entirely made out of coal?

A carbonation!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If a sex worker does their work entirely online...

... Can they be called an "Internet Service Provider?"

Scientists now believe that the success of the Olympics depends almost entirely on the 100m dash.

They call it the critical race theory.

What do you call an island populated entirely by cakes?

Desserted!

There was a jungle tribe of people who lived entirely off the land...

They hunted and foraged, and built structures with wildgrasses and leaves. Most of the tribe was kind and giving, except for the one greedy old coot. He did not live modestly: full feasts when others were hungry, 2-story hut when the rest were 1, and the rarest dyes on all of his clothes. This old c...

I’ve designed an aeroplane made entirely from rubber, so if it crashed, it would bounce

It’s a boing 747

McDonalds just released a new sandwich made entirely of beef lips.

They're calling it the McJagger.

My friend didn't believe me when I told her I could build a car entirely out of spaghetti.

She was very skeptical, but you should have seen her face when I drove pasta.

England is finally honoring it's longest river entirely in it's border by making repairs to the over 45 navigation locks used for transportation, improving the many drinking water systems abstracting flow from it's discharge into the sea, and providing for wildlife sanctuaries near the coast.

The people will vote on the entire referendum poised to fund the project.

It's called the Bond...the Thames Bond....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I’m going to build a fence made entirely from poop...

I’ll have to start with a shit post.

The Actor that plays Pennywise has a security detail comprised entirely of disfigured war vets who maim mall security

Skaarsgards scarred guards scars guards

What do you call a committee made up entirely of people named William?

A Billboard.

An Australian is aboard the wrong airplane

The flight attendant approaches them and says “I’m so sorry. I’m not sure how this mix-up happened but this plane is arriving in an entirely different country than your intended destination.”

The Australian says “No way.”

The flight attendant replies “Sweden, actually.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a motorcycle club comprised entirely of bisexual monarchs from Scandinavia?

The Bikings.

I have achieved my life's goal of writing an entire theatrical performance made up entirely of puns.

It's a play on words.

Is there a word to describe answers that are completely correct but entirely useless?

Yes, there is.

What do you call a knight made entirely out of china?

Sir Ramic

2020 has given an entirely new meaning to drive-by.

More of a shower thought, but it made me chuckle. My kids were invited to a "birthday drive-by" and I don't ever recall a drive-by being a good thing...

Why are atoms selfish?

Because they're all that matter!


...Courtesy of my witty wife after my 11 year old asked the "Why should you never trust atoms? - because they make up everything" joke.

I thought surely the joke already existed, but I couldn't find it anywhere. Doesn't entirely work, but it got a l...

Marvel have announced their newest Superhero team, one consisting entirely of Trans-woman.

The Ex-Men.

Two Frenchmen are going for a walk one day, when they happen upon a swimming pool filled entirely to the brim with loaves of bread.

The first, who happens to be a baker, exclaims "Mon amie, what a beautiful sight! I'm going to dive into this pool."

The second says "I'm not sure that's such a good idea. If you hit the bottom, you're going to be in a lot of pain."

Did you hear about the beer made entirely out of rabbits, frogs and kangaroos?

It’s mostly hops.

One day, not too far off, Florida will be an entirely Blue state.

With the sea level rising, it'll be underwater.

Three vampires are in a cabin in the woods...

The three vampires are sitting together in a cabin talking about their accomplishments as vampires.
Soon, they start to brag who's the best vampire. Then they suggest a competition: who can suck the most blood in the least time.

The first one leaves and returns after an hour, his lips ...

In ancient Timbuktu they made their houses entirely out of dung.

I'd have loved to have been a fly on the wall in that house.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

She did what he said

The retiring mailman

The mailman who had been on the same route for 10 years was leaving the job.

He had made many friends on the route and decided to put a note in their mailboxes informing them.

Many on his route came out of their houses to wish him well and some even gave h...

Scientists have discovered a planet populated entirely by robots.

They call it Mars.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a phallic shaped potato growing entirely above ground?

A rootless dick-tater

There's a fire at the local chemical plant...

One dark night outside a small town, a fire started inside the local chemical plant. Before long, it exploded into flames and an alarm went out to fire departments from miles around.

After fighting the fire for over an hour, the plant president approached the fire chief and said "All our secr...

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