Why doesn't China have a phone directory?

Because there are so many Wings and Wongs they'd still wing the wong number.

A funeral director is standing at the edge of a cliff, about to jump

Funeral Director: I'm ruined! My funeral directory business has gone bankrupt! I will lose my home, my wife, my kids. I'm RUINED!!! RUINED!!!!!!!! Okay... on three, I jump. One... two... thr-

Man: What are you doing?

Funeral director: I'm about to commit suicide. You?

Man: Also ...

Two filmmakers, Juan and Theotto, are talking over lunch…

…when Juan says to Theotto, "So, how's your work been lately?"

Theotto replies, "Eh, it's been pretty alright. I did get this rather--ahem--'interesting' screenplay recently."

Juan: "Yeah?"

Theotto: "Yeah. It was thick as a brick. It had this giant cast of characters, and there ...

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