UPJOKE
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Why did Karen press Ctrl+Alt+Del?

She needed that Task manager

I have three kids named Ctrl, Alt, and Del.

When they mess up, I hit them all at once.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

“Las Bolas del Toro”, a joke my grandfather loves to tell me.

A young man visits Spain on a trip, he hears a ruckus and goes to inspect.

He finds an arena where the bull fighting had just ended, and sees a lot of people filing into a restaurant across the street.

The young man sits down and begins looking at the menu, when suddenly he hears the...

Ever tried to 'Google' Del Amitri? I did, but nothing ever happens.

Nothing happens at all.

A thought about Del Toro’s “The Shape of Water”

“The Shape of Water” is a story about a woman who falls in love with an otherworldly creature that learns how to communicate, has a funny scene where he interacts with a domestic setting and has magical healing hands. He is also returned to his natural environment, almost dying on the way by a pluck...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a restaurant after a bull fight

A man walks into a Spanish restaurant after a big bull fight. He looks at the menu for a bit and spots ‘meatballs del toro’. So he calls the waiter over and orders this plate. Later, two giant, steaming meatballs come out atop a large plate of spaghetti. Best meatballs the man has ever had. He leave...

What is Michael Jackson’s favourite Indian city?

New Del he-he

Have you guys heard about the new film adaptation of Poe's "The Tell-Tale Heart?"

It's rumored to star Beneathio del Flooro.

What do you call Monty Python if it's filled with corn?

Del Monte Python

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A man goes to a college campus. . .

A man goes to a college campus for a tour because he thinks he wants to go the following year. As he's taking his tour, he sees a large crowd surrounding a fraternity house.

He moves through the crowd and is shocked when he sees dozens of people on the lawn on the house, giving each other blo...

If James Bond was Spanish.

My name is Bond.
James Diego Jose Fransisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno Maria del los Remedios omg Bond..

Which sultry-voiced singer will happily spit in your face?

Llama Del Rey.

What were Stephen Hawking's last words?

Ctrl + Alt + Del

Survivor: Texas Edition

Due to the popularity of the "Survivor" shows, Texas is planning to do one entitled: "Survivor - Texas Edition".

The lucky contestants will all start in Dallas then drive a circuit to Waco, Austin, San Antonio, Houston, Brownsville, Del Rio, El Paso, Odessa, Midland, Lubbock, Amarillo, Abilen...

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This man was about to propose, until she revealed this detail...

Steve and Sara met while on a Royal Caribbean singles cruise and Steve fell head over heels for her. And when they discovered they both lived in New York City Steve was ecstatic. He immediately started asking her out when they got home.

Within a couple of weeks, Steve had taken Sara to the mo...

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