A Brit, A Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the garden of Eden
"Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit."They must be British"
They pondered this possibility but the Frenchman and the Russians soon shake their heads in disagreement.
"Nonsense," says the Frenchman. "They're naked and so beautiful, clearly they are French". The Brit and ...
Fans of celine dion attended a viewing of a calm plate of mustard
They misheard the words *serene dijon*
Thor was viewing the earth, when he saw a beautiful milkmaid. He transformed to human form, descended to earth - and seduced her.
They made love for 3 days and 3 nights, then one morning Thor was stood with his back to her, shuttered sunlight streaming through his golden hair and across his massive frame - the very image of godlike perfection. And he spoke.
“Darling, I must away from this place” he turned round for dram...
After viewing the disappointing post-debate polls, Trump asked Kushner how to do better in the following debate.
Jared said,"be positive, spread your positivity, and after all is said and done, try to come across as a patient person"
I was with a funeral director, planning my final arrangements. He asked me if I wanted to have a family viewing prior to the services.
I told him "Remains to be seen."
I was viewing a house being sold by a native american
i asked him if it came with running water,
He said 'no, get your own wife'
An amateur artist was show casing his work for the first time at a public viewing.
and a well known art critic is in attendance. The critic says to the young artist, "would you like my opinion on your work?" "Yes, " says the artist. "It's worthless," says the critic The artist replies, "I know, but tell me anyway."
A new widow is talking to the funeral director
She says, "Lying over there is my John, God rest his soul. And he's laid out in his favorite brown suit. I kept my promise to send him here with that suit, but he looks awful in brown."
"Here's $200. I want you to get him a blue suit for the viewing and funeral."
The undertaker says he...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
What's worse than a fat guy with a ridiculous haircut who's brainwashed his supporters into viewing him as a god whilst having his finger on the button for nuclear warfare?...
Two fat guys with ridiculous haircuts who've brainwashed their supporters into viewing them as gods whilst having their fingers on the buttons for nuclear warfare!
[Scariest of all is that it’s true :( ]
What message does a Quantum-Computer return when you're viewing a file?
"Do you want to save those changes?"
The co-founder of Adobe who developed the PDF file format has died.
The funeral viewing will be a closed casket since it's too much trouble trying to open it.
Why did the Calculus Teacher take the student's calculator away?
He was viewing graphic material
A man who'd just died is delivered to a local mortuary
... and he's wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit.
The mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like the body dressed, pointing out that the man does look good in the black suit he is already wearing.
The widow, however, says that she always thought her husband lo...