I periodically see my doctor and our conversations go like this...

Doc: your diet isn't great. Don't you think you should try to easy off on the salt?

Me: Na

Doc: you really should. You might develop respiratory issues and have trouble breathing.

Me: O

Doc: and try eating more fruits. They'll give you more vitamins and minerals

Me...

I used to date a periodicals librarian…

…but we broke up because she had too many issues.

My favorite elements in the periodical chart are oxygen and potassium.

But most other people just find them O K.

How often do scientists reference the Table of Elements?

Periodically.

Why do electricians periodically call their parents just to bad mouth them?

So they stay grounded.

(Only percussionists would get this) I play mallets in band class, and so periodically my teacher would see how I was doing.

I always pass the vibe check.

I’ll leave now.

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