This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"I want to prescribe you new cutting edge drug against depression. But I have good news and bad news about the drug"

"I prefer to hear bad news first".

"Okay. Bad news are that said drug has many side-effects. You will feel dizzy, tired, bad taste in your mouth, periodical urges to vomit, etc."

"And good news?"

"You won't give a fuck."

I used to date a periodicals librarian…

…but we broke up because she had too many issues.

How often do you make chemistry jokes?

Periodically

Why do electricians periodically call their parents just to bad mouth them?

So they stay grounded.

(Only percussionists would get this) I play mallets in band class, and so periodically my teacher would see how I was doing.

I always pass the vibe check.

I’ll leave now.

Did you hear about the part-time chemist?

He only worked periodically.

Do you want to know what I realized about Quiet Kids that are also Science Nerds?

They only speak periodically.

A married couple was lying in bed one night. The wife is all curled up, ready to go to sleep, as the husband turns his bed lamp on to read a book

As he's reading, he periodically reaches over to his wife, and fondles her "special area". He does this a few times, but only for very short intervals before turning back to read his book.

The wife gradually becomes more and more aroused... and, assuming that her husband is seeking some enco...

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