The sand pit

Dylan was playing in the sand pit with Ellie. He comes back from recess and speaks to his teacher.

She asks him "What did you do in recess today?"
"I played in the sandbox with Ellie" he says.

"That's great! If you can write the word "sand" on the board, I'll give you a cookie."<...

An Italian, a Scotsman and a Chinese man, are hired at a Construction site. The foreman points out a huge pile of sand.

He says to the Italian guy, "You're in charge of sweeping."

To the Scotsman he says, "You're in charge of shoveling."

And to the Chinese guy, "You're in charge of supplies."

He then says, "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you men to make a dent in that pile of s...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman goes through border control on her bicycle with two panniers filled with sand.

The border guard was suspicious about it and searched through the sand, but couldn’t find anything hidden, so he had to let her through.

The next day, the same woman passes by, again riding a bike with two bags brimming with bright sand. The guard was still unable to find anything. He felt so...

A man was riding his motorcycle through the border of Germany and Austria every week carrying 2 bags filled with sand.

The border guard, an older man, searched both bags every time, but never found anything so he let him through. This goes on for a couple days until the border guard had his last day before retirement. Again the man comes to the boarder, both bags filled with sand. The guard asks him: "Look man, toda...

Sand dollars aren’t in Europe right?

Because if they were wouldn’t they be called sand euros

What do you ask a lawyer buried alive up to his neck in sand?

"Run out of sand, did they?"

My favorite childhood memory was building sand castles with my grandpa.

Then my mom hid the urn from me.

There is this guy on a motorcycle that takes two bags of sand over the France/Spain border every week.

The bags get investigated every week by the border police but he can never find anything wrong with the bags. After about two years of this happening the border police has to ask.

"Sir," the border police stops the man as he came by again, "this is my last day on the job and I will not tell a...

An Irishman, an Englishman, and an Welshman were walking along the beach when they came across an old lamp wedged in the sand.

They picked it up, gave it a little rub, and a genie appeared.
“I usually give three wishes,” proclaimed the genie, “but as there are three of you, I will give you one wish each.”
The Irishman paused for a second then said, “I wish there was no more racist stereotypes in the world.”
“Grant...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My sister asked for me to bring her something hard to write on

I don't know why she became so mad. It's pretty fucking hard to write on sand.

What do you call a bunch of lawyers buried up to their necks in sand?

Not enough sand.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A pirate walked into a bar.

He had a wooden leg, an eye patch and a hook for a hand. The bartender was curious.
"How did you get that wooden leg?" he asked.

The pirate took a swig of ale. "'Twas a terrible sea battle. I stood bravely, directly facing 12 cannons.All they managed to hit was my leg."

The bartende...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?”

The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk." The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his...

A communist and his friend walk into an antique store

His friend said:

“Woah,look at this really fancy cone glass thing with the sand!,its mine!”

The communist said:

no


Its Hourglass

What do you call a witch that only eats sand?

Malnourished.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Here It Is! The Poopie list!

Ghost Poopie--The kind where you feel the poopie come out, but there is no poopie in the toilet.

Clean Poopie--The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.

Wet Poopie--The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unw...

Be careful what you ask for

A guy walks into a bar, followed by 12 beautiful women. He slams a bag of gold down and says, " Bartender, drinks for everyone".

The bartender just finished setting up drinks for everyone at the bar when suddenly a 12 inch tall man jumped out from the rich guys jacket and runs down the len...

I love going to the beach, having a seat, and pull sand up to my crotch

Makes the crabs feel more at home.

A man is walking along a beach when he finds something in the sand.

He kicks it over and sees that it’s a magic lamp. A genie comes out and tell him, “Since you found me, I will grant you 3 wishes, but since you kicked me the person you hate most will receive double that wish” The person who the man hated most was his boss, so the man asked for his first wish, “I’d ...

Stupid kid joke: Why was the sand at the beach wet?

Because the sea wee'd.

Two Grains of Sand...

Two grains of sand go on a trip to the beach. One says to the other, “Jesus, it’s crowded here!”

Once there was a young boy, around 8 years old, who lived in a village at the bottom of a hill. On top of the hill was a temple where monks lived.

One day, he heard a strange sound coming from the top of the hill. Curious, he walks up the hill and knocks on the giant doors at the front of the temple. The head monk answers the door and asks what he can do for the kid. However, when the kid asks what the sound was, he simply replies, “I can’t te...

Sandbox games

The newlyweds and young parents in town discover that the fine sand in the nearby nature resort makes for excellent sandbox sand. So people go in to get a big cart of sand and make some cheap garden sandboxes for their children. The park rangers forbid this and nobody can steal sand anymore. This gu...

A man walks into a bar and sees a guy with a big orange head sitting alone in the corner.

He walks up to the barman and asks: "What's with that guy over there with the big orange head?"

The barman replies: "Buy him a drink and he might tell you his story"

So the man buys two drinks and walks over to the man with the big orange head sitting in the corner. He sits at his tabl...

Sand Castle with Grandma

Today, I made sand castles with my grandma, but for some reason, everybody freaked out and called the cops on me.



Next time, I'll do it away from the cremation center.

A Construction joke,

This Guy lives in a bad neighborhood and every night, when he walks home, he grabs a couple of cobblestones in each hand, for protection from thieves and muggers....

After some time, there is a pile of cobblestones outside his home...

His Contractor neighbor notices and asks, "What's ...

Why can't you starve in the desert?

Because of all the sand which is there.

For all my life my dad kept messing with the ledge above the fire place, lengthening it, shortening it, sanding it, painting it. But he died last week. After I got home from the funeral I compulsively got my tools out and raised it six inches higher ...

... I guess you could say I’ve taken up his mantel.

2 refugees cross the border.

2 refugees cross the border. They wander in the desert, lost and running low on supplies. They continue on until a week later. Now out of supplies and really struggling, one of them stops and says, "Hey, Jose, you smell that"?

Jose sniffs the air and replies, " No, I don't smell anything"....

An engineer, a physicist and a mathematician get stranded on a desert island…

Right away the engineer finds some stick and stones, which he uses to build a hammer, which he uses to break open coconuts to get some nutrients.

After five days eating plenty of coconuts, he decides to go looking for the physicist.

He finds the physicist quite thin, he clearly have no...

I walked up to the miserable old woman that lives at the end of my street.

I said, "What's your favourite type of sandwich?"

She said, "Probably cheese."

I said, "Cheese isn't a type of sand."

Golf with Ed

Dan was busy at work when he saw Randy and Ed come in for their shifts looking very upset at each other. He tried asking Ed what was wrong, but Ed just pointed to Randy and said "Ask him!".

So Dan asks Randy what happened. Randy sighed and said "Well Dan, would you play with someone who cheat...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A brave and fearsome pirate captain approached an uncharted island, searching for treasure.

His crew raced ahead in their rowboat, eagerly awaiting a massive payday. They came upon a large forest and began searching desperately for the last clue on the map.

As the first mate guided them carefully up to a clearing, he gasped and pointed at a crouched figure straight ahead. The capta...

Yesterday I broke my hourglass

It took forever to clean up and I was only able to save about half the sand. All in all it was a waste of time.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three men crash land on a desert island, 3 days later they find a magic lamp in the sand on the beach

>**this joke works best if you do the actions when you're telling it**

The men get very excited about the lamp and as they dust the sand away it hums and buzzes before a genie emerges in a puff of blue smoke.

"You have freed me from my prison," says the Genie, "For this, I will give...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Damn Little Johnny

Little Johnny was sitting in class on a Thursday and the teacher made an announcement. She said that she was going to start asking one question every Thursday and if anyone got the correct answer school on Friday would be dismissed. So the first question was...How much does the earth weigh? Little v...

Glass eye

A guy just exited a high rise hotel on the beach and he's walking along the sand and boom something hits his foot. After further examination he sees that it's a glass eye. He immediately looks up and there's a beautiful woman on the 3rd floor looking over the balcony and he shout's "is this your gla...

A man was walking down the beach one day when he found a dirty old lamp in the sand.

A man was walking down the beach one day when he found a dirty old lamp in the sand.

He picked the lamp up and started rubbing the dirt and sand off the lamp to clean it when all of a sudden a Genie pops out of it in a big puff of smoke.

"I am the Genie of the lamp", says the Genie to ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Retired Jewish Man Is Walking On The Beach, When He Sees A Bottle In The Sand.

He picks it up and rubs it, and a genie comes out. The genie promises to grant him one wish.

The man pulls a crumpled map from his pocket and shows it to the genie. He says, "Peace in the Middle East, that's my wish."

The genie studies the map, but looks looks concerned. He hands the...

I went on a cruise once, and we were hit by a gigantic wave, and the boat sank.

I woke up on a sugar sand beach, with gigantic cotton candy clouds filling the sky, and the sea glistened under the setting sun like a pool of honey, next to me was a volleyball that looked like a marshmallow. Towering above me was a gigantic volcano that looked like an upside down ice cream cone....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sand paper sally

So a guy gets out of prison. He has been locked up about 15 years but the day has finally come and he is loving life.
He gets released and has the clothes on his back and give dollars to his name.
Above all else, before food, lodging, anything. This man wants some pussy.
So, he goes to a br...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Nun's Story

A nun is sitting with her Mother Superior, chatting.

"I used some horrible language this week, and I feel absolutely terrible about it."

"When did you use this awful language?" asks the elder.

"Well I was golfing and hit an incredible drive that looked like it was going to go ov...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Silence or Dishes

Joe wanted to buy a motorcycle.

He doesn't have much luck, until one day, he comes across a Harley with a FOR SALE sign on it.

The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old.

It's shiny and in absolute mint condition.

He immediately buys it and ask...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A cop was walking around a children playground

He sees a kid playing in the sand, so he goes to him and asks:

-Hi there champ, what are you building?

-A cop

-Oh, that's really nice, and how are you going to do that?

-I will use some water, sand and shit

The cop gets angry and starts pulling and tugging his ears...

Why do they call it kinetic sand?

Because it lacks potential

What happens when there are really bad sand storms on Naboo?

Jar Jar blinks

What’s the difference between menstrual fluid and sand?

You can’t gargle sand.

Son was playing on the beach, making a sand castle with a plastic bucket and shovel.

Hey son, I think your bucket is getting sick. It's starting to look a little pail.

A colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence. For example:

- Jane ate her friend’s sandwich.

-
- - Jane ate her friend’s colon.

A man is walking along the beach with his wife when he stumbles upon an oil lamp poking from the sand...

Intrigued, the man picks it up and begins to rub the sand off it. To his surprise, a genie emerges from the lamp!

The genie says in a mighty voice, "As a reward for releasing me, I shall grant you three wishes. However, your wife shall receive double of what you ask for."

Without hesit...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Guy is shipwrecked on a desert island.

Not much to do, just some trees with coconuts, some sand... and a sheep.

After a few weeks, the guy starts feeling a little hard up, so he tries to catch the sheep and have his way with it. Alas, he cannot catch the sheep. Every day it gets worse- he is increasingly more horny, but the shee...

A man walks into a bar...

As he walks into the bar, he notices a small man playing the piano, about a foot tall.

Fascinated by how small the man is, he goes up to the bartender and asks, "Excuse me sir, how did you find that little piano man?"

The bartender explains. "Well, one day I was walking along the beac...

Why do lawsuits against sand and silt never make it to court?

Sediment always settles

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A group of golfers get stuck behind a really slow group

Four golfers (a doctor, a lawyer, a priest, and an engineer) are stuck behind a really slow group of golfers. They start to get frustrated, so they call up the course's pro.

"Hey, how come you're letting guys like this on the course? They're hitting their balls all over the place, spending wa...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A widowed Jewish lady was sunbathing on a beach in Fort Myers, Florida.

She looked up and noticed that a man her age had walked up, placed his blanket on the sand next to hers and began reading a book. Smiling, she attempted to strike up a conversation with him. "Hello, sir, how are you today?"

"Fine, thank you," he responded, and turned back to his book.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Maria had 3 children, snowflake, sand, and brick.

One day snowflake goes to her mom and asks her: Mom, why am I called snowflake? Then the mother replies: Because when you were born, a snowflake fell on your head. The next day goes Sand and asks: Mom, why am I called Sand? And the mother replies: Because when you were born, a small grain of sand f...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

NSFW: hope this isn't a repost, never seen it here, but one of my favorites I heard at least 20 years ago . A woman is walking alone on the beach one day....

Enjoying the beautiful day when she stubs her toe and stumbles over something in the sand. She turns around and is stunned to see a genie rising from smoke out of a lamp. The genie looks at her twirling his goatee and informs her he can grant her one wish. She takes a moment to ponder her decision a...

For my birthday, my friends gave me a bunch of dirt and sand.

I appreciate the sediment, but...

Two drunk guys were about to get into a fight. One of them takes a stick, draws a line in the sand, and says to the other, “If you cross this line, I’ll hit you in the face!”

That was the punchline.

What's the difference between a train wagon full of babies and a train wagon full of sand?

You can't unload sand using pitchforks.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sitting in the sand at the nudist resort, I wondered,

What's all the fuss about anal beaching?

I lose my White friends in the snow, I lose my Black friends at night, I lose my Asian friends in the sand, where do I lose my Arab friends?

In an explosion.

A man is going across the border with different bicycles everyday with bags of sand on the handle bars

The border patrol searches methodically and carefully everyday in the sand and they are never able to find anything. An agent retired 7 years later meets the man in a cafe while they’re both getting a coffee. The man asked if he could buy the drink but a question would have to be answered. The man ...

What do you call four bull fighters in quick sand?

Cuatro sink-o.

How do you keep a blind kid entertained?

You give them a sheet of sand paper and tell them that it’s a find-a-word.

Why will you never go hungry in the desert?

Because of the sand, which is there.

Camel Joke

A young camel asks his mother
“Why do I have a big hump on my back”
The mother replies
“You use it to store water when your in the desert”
“That’s cool” says the young camel “ And why do I have these big hooves”
The mother answers “Your hooves stop you from sinking in the quicksand w...

An engineering student, a geometry major, and a star basketball player are trapped on a desert island

They’re debating how to get off the island or get rescued. The engineering student looks around and sees only a few palm trees and some coconuts.

“We need to cut down the trees and make a raft to sail away on.” He says and starts designing.

“We need a basketball to pass the time.” Th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three men are walking down a beach when they find a lamp buried in the sand.

They dig up the lamp, brush it off, and poof! a genie appears.

"I shall grant each of you three wishes," the genie intones.

The first guy wishes for unlimited wealth. Poof! Wish granted.

The second guy also wishes for unlimited wealth. Poof!

The third guy starts flailing ...

Two men are going golfing, when one stops by the pro shop...

"I need to get a sleeve of balls, you want me to pick you up some"



"No thanks. I just need this one."



"Just one ball? What if you hit it deep into the woods?"



"Well, it makes a whistle after you hit it. Can't lose it. I only need this one."

...

There was a poetry competition final with two contestants, a university student and an old country man.

They each had 20 seconds to come up with a poem about Timbuktu.

The student goes first and says " Across the desert sands, crossed a lonely caravan, men on camels two by two, destination Timbuktu."

The crowd goes wild cheering for the poem.

The old country man then goes, "Tim...

Where do crabs store their money?

In the sand bank.

What did the dog say when he sat down on sand paper?

Rough.

I love relaxing with some sand paper

It's just a little something to take the edge off

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man's car breaks down in Tibet..

A man's car breaks down in Tibet, and wouldn't you know it? His phone gets no service. So he walks up a long windy road to a huge monastery at the top of the hill. He knocks at the reinforced double doors and a Tibetan monk after some minutes finally opens.

"My car broke down. Do you...

Lost: bucket of sand, silt, and gravel

Great sedimental value.



(I can't take credit. Read it in a university paper 20 years ago.)

A man spots an empty beach as he frantically searches for a place to land his plane.

He's run out fuel but he is a skilled enough pilot to guide his aircraft down and gracefully crash into the sand. He comes in at a small angle and exits his vehicle without a scratch on him.

"Damn it, what could have gone wrong?" He ponders for a short while before he starts assessing the da...

What do you get when you cross the ocean with sand?

Honestly, I'm not that *shore* myself.

Jesus and Moses are at the beach

Jesus and Moses are at the beach, enjoying their time down on earth they wanna see if they’ve still got it. So Moses walks up to the ocean, raises his hand and tries with all his might to part the sea. After a lot of effort Moses eventually manages to part the sea.

Then Jesus says “alright i...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a bar he's never visited before, and settles down to order a drink.

Before long, he notices someone sitting in the corner - a man who appears normal in every regard except that his head is a gigantic orange. Curious, the newcomer asks the bartender "What's up with the guy in the corner? The one with the-" but the bartender interrupts and says "Honestly, your best be...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My favourite long joke

Pete and Dave are on the first tee. Pete slices an enormous shot into the middle of a dense wood. ‘Oh no he says (insert appropriate profanity), I’ll never find that; that makes a whole box of golf balls I’ve lost this month. ‘

Dave says ‘you should try one of these,’ producing a ball from hi...

Where are you when you're eating an Eggo on the beach and you drop it in the sand?

San Diego

(thought of this myself, it's better spoken)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man was walking with his camel in the desert and he was so horny

so he decided to fuck the camel so he tried to put his dick in the camel but the camel moved it’s ass left and right so he couldn’t , so he decided to keep going with the camel in the desert until he heard a scream for help he went there and found a very hot woman sinking in quick sand so he saved h...

Popcorn, ice, sand, water

is my bucket list. What's yours?

There was a man who took very good care of his body. Every day he lifted weights and jogged 6 miles.

One day, he looked in the mirror and noticed that he was tanned all over, apart from on his ‘thing’.

So, he decided to do something about it…

He went to the beach, took off all his clothes and buried himself in the sand, except for his ‘thing’ which he left sticking out.

Two old...

A baby Camel asks his Mother

"Mom, why do we have these huge three-toed feet?"

The mother replies, "Well son when we trek across the desert your toes will help you to stay on top of the soft sand."

"Bloody Brilliant!" Says the baby camel.

A few minutes later the son asks, "Mom, why have I got these great ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy walking on the beach comes across a brass lantern half buried in the sand...

He picks up the lamp, and on a whim rubs it to see what happens. Yep, a genie appears and offers him 3 wishes. Knowing that genies often play tricks, like delivering the billion dollars you wished for by dropping 1 billion in gold bars on your head, he thinks carefully about his first two wishes....

A Mexican guy comes riding up to the border on his bicycle with two big sacks over his shoulders.

He tells the border guard that the sacks are full of sand, but the guard doesn’t believe him.

The guard detains the guy, and rips open the bags, but there’s nothing but sand.

He even has the sand analyzed, only to find that it really is just sand. And the sack is just a plain sack. <...

The story of snow, sand and brick.

This is the story of three kids named snow, sand and brick.
One day, snow asked his mother:
Mom, why did you named me snow ?
His mother answered:
This is because when you were born, a little bit of snow fell on your head.
Then, sand comes in and asked his mother:
Mom, why did you n...

Once there is a Family Mom, Snow Flake, Grain of sand and Cinder block

Snow Flake asks her mom "Mom why did you call me Snow Flake?"
And her mom replies " Because when you were born a snow flake fell on your forehead."
Then Grain of sand asks "Mom why did you call me Grain of sand?"
And then mom replies " Because when you were born a grain of sand fell on your...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A tourist is backpacking through the highland of Scotland (Taken from Andrew Stanton’s Ted talk)

A tourist is backpacking through the highlands of Scotland, and he stops at a pub to get a drink. The only people in their is the bartender and an old man drinking a beer. He orders a pint and they sit in silence and drink for a while.

Suddenly the old man turns to him and says, “ye see this ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A black man is lost in the desert and is about to die.

Suddenly, he sees a shiny object in the sand. He gets close, and realizes that it’s a magic lamp!

He rubs the lamp and a genie appears.

“I’m an almighty genie” he says.
“I shall grant you any three wishes”

The man thinks about it for a while, then he says:
“I want to be wh...

A man finds a lamp in the sand . . .

He rubs it and a genie comes out, offering three wishes.

Now the man is smart, so he knows that the genie will twist his wishes around on him. He's also depressed, so he doesn't mind *too* much if things go really bad. So he decides to se if he can use some reverse psychology on the genie....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a bar...

He orders a fuzzy navel.

Bartender: "We don't have those right now, but I can give you the next best thing: a hairy bellybutton"

The man orders it, drinks it, and says "not bad. How about sex on the beach?"

Bartender: "We don't have those right now, but I can give you the next ...

I was enjoying a sandwich on a cliff, but it fell from my hands.

I thought to myself...

“This sub has gone downhill”.

How does an Arab farmer find his goat in the sand dunes?

Very satisfying.

Mr Brown was an avid golfer, who was terrible, yet every chance he'd get, he's hitting the links.

One day, as he was heading out, his wife asked him to take their son with him, since she was going to be too busy.

Reluctantly, he agreed, and loaded up the car to go to the course.

Knowing that his son wasn't athletically gifted, he decided he was going to use him to keep score for hi...

Recess and cookies

An elementary teacher asks her students what they did during recess.

Teacher: Johnny what did you do doing recess?

Johnny: I played in the sandbox.

Teacher: Okay, if you can write the word "sand" on the board, you get a cookie.

Johnny writes "sand" and gets his cookie....

A boy and a girl are playing naked in the sand, when the boy starts laughing at the girl that she does not have a peepee. The girl just grins and says...

When I grow up, I will have as many peepees as I like.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man, his wife and a good-looking stranger are stranded on a desert island.

The wife quickly loses interest in her husband and begins flirting with the good-looking stranger.

The three start to build a watchtower. The stranger offers to take first watch.

While the husband and wife gather driftwood on the sand, the stranger yells, "Hey! No sex on the beach! G...

An old joke about the Gurkhas

During the second world war a company of Germans were in the desert when a voice called out from behind a sand dune: "One Gurkha can kill five Germans!" Irritated by this the German captain sends a couple of soldiers round to sort out this man out, nobody disrespects the German army.

Moments ...

What did the sand say to the gravel when asked "How are you?"

I am FINE bro.

A landscaper is adding a bunch of sand along the edge of a pond...

He looks at the guy who owns the pond and asks "do you really want me doing this?"

The man snaps back, "YES! JUST KEEP WORKING!"

The landscaper replies "ok! Jeez! I'm just makin' shore!"

Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea-weed.

*First joke my 4 year old son learnt

Sandy, an 18 year old boy, desperately wants a car.

However, his mother forcibly tells him no. Sandy, undeterred, decides to get a job to pay. He applies for many jobs, ranging from a mechanic to delivering newspapers. However, he is not accepted for any of them. Slowly, he gives up on his dream of buying a car.

Weeks later, Sandy tells his mo...

A thief stole a sine and a cosine... He took the two identities to a beach. However, they were too heavy for him to carry.

He wanted to keep them under the sand, but the beach was so narrow that it could only contain one of them: sine or cosine. He decided that, using his mathematical skills, that he would stack sine over cosine - but that resulted in tan! He did not want to get tan. So he stacked cosine over sine... <...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A young Arab boy asks his father “What is that strange hat you are wearing?”

The father said: "Why, my son, it is a 'chechia.' In the desert it protects our heads from the intense heat of the sun.”

"And what is the long flowing robe you are wearing?” asked the boy.

“Oh, my son!” exclaimed the father “It is very simple. This is a 'djbellah.' As I have told you, ...

Women are like sand...

fun to play with only when wet.

What's dead, brown, and covered in sand?

Shamima Begum's kids.

A Polish guy finds a lamp buried in the sand

As per usual, a genie comes out and offers him three wishes.

The Polish guy things for a moment and says, "I wish for all of Ghengis Khan's armies to go rampaging across the steppes to the border of Poland, then turn around and go home."

"All right," the genie says, "Done. What's your ...

What do you call a witch who only eats sand?

Anything you like - she’s dead.

I saw a single set of footprints in the sand...

"Lord," I asked, "why is there but one set of footprints in the sand?"

"My child," he tenderly replied, "Those are Chris Christie's."

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.