There were two white christian men, John and Mike, whose plane crashed into a desert. Luckily they survived unharmed. As they traveled through the hot desert looking for food and water, they gave up and sat down, thinking of what to do.

As the dust in the air settled, they suddenly could view a mosque ahead. They became very hopeful. But then John said ''Muslims are there. They might help us if we say we are Muslim.'' Then Mike said ''No way, I won't say I'm Muslim, I'm gonna be honest''.

So John and Mike went to the Mosque ...

An American and a Chinese man are stranded on a desert island

"We need to work together,", the american said.

"Ok,", he continued. "I will make shelter, while you get supplies."

"Ok", the chinese man answered before walking further in on the island.

Two days went by, and the american had built shelter. He was starting to starve, and as the...

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My sex life is like the Sahara desert.

Just two palms, no dates.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert

They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. 

The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. 

The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. 

The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my frie...

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A horny American man gets sent to the desert for a job

The desert has a total population of 50 people. After a couple months of his "dry-spell", the man seeks to find out if there's a way to "get the job done" somewhere in the desert.

He asks the locals around and they guide him to the "PIMP with the Camel". He immediately runs up to the PIMP and...

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A guy was stranded on a desert island with Heidi Klum...

Initially, he played it cool, not making any moves on her for several weeks. Finally, he asked her if they could start a physical relationship, so as to attend to each other's needs. Heidi was game and a very nice sexual relationship began. After several months, the guy approached Heidi and said,...

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A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde are in car that is driving on a remote desert road.

All of a sudden, an armadillo runs into the road and the car swerves to avoid hitting it. Unfortunately, the car was going very fast, so it flips upside down and lights on fire.

The three women in the car only have enough time to grab one type of item before escaping. The redhead grabs a bun...

A guy is crawling through the desert, about to die of thirst and he comes across a magic talking snake...

The snake tells the guy his name is Nate and he'll happily grant him three wishes, so the guy asks for water. Nate slaps his tail on the ground and a gallon of fresh, pure water appears, which the guy proceeds to drink.

"What's your second wish?" Nate asks. The guy thinks for a second and say...

Why is it impossible to starve in the desert?

Because of all the sand which is there.

An African Lumberjack

An African lumberjack is interviewing for a job at a major logging company. The foreman decides to take a practical route and hands the lumberjack an axe.

"Take a couple swings at that tree over there." The foreman said.

The lumberjack walks over to the tree and fells it in a single ch...

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are in a desert

The three friends have been walking for ages and ages, all three think they're going to die there.

Eventually, the Englishman finds a lamp, and he gives it a rub.

A genie pops out and says "each of you can have one wish".

"I want to go home!" the Englishman says, poofing away f...

A man is lost in the Sahara desert when he stumbles upon a magic lamp...

He rubs the lamp and a genie pops out!

The genie says that he will grant the man only one wish, and that he has to pick from three choices. He can either be the richest man in the world, the most popular man in the world, or the wisest man in the world. The man says "We all know that money do...

Two white guys, stranded in a desert, with no food or water see a tall majestic building. The scorching sun sure isn’t making their journey easier.

The first guy recognises this structure and says “Hey Bill, this is a mosque!” - to which Bill replies, “John, you think they’ll be hospitable and give us food and shelter”

“I don’t know Bill, but we’re desperate and we need to find a way to survive”

“I have an idea - Let’s change ou...

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NSFW Why are camels called the ship of the desert?

Because they’re full of Arab semen.

Three brothers have been traveling in a desert

The heat was too intense, if they didn’t find shelter immediately they would die

All of a sudden the first brother, the oldest, finds a lamp. Without hesitation he rubs it only for a genie to appear moments later

The genies shouts, “Ah! I awaken once more! You three men shall each get ...

A blonde, a brunette and a red head were stranded on a desert island....

The brunette was a very intelligent woman and was able to figure out using her years of mathematical know-how, that it was 20 miles to the nearest shore and she thought she could swim it.

So off she went and made it out 5 miles and got exhausted and drowned.

After a few days the redhea...

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Pedro and Juan are stranded in the desert... (My favourite joke, [LONG])

After a day of walking, staggering, then crawling, they are thirsty, starving, and near death. They are about to give up when Juan exclaims,

“Pedro, look! At thee bottom of the dune... it’s an Oasis!”

Pedro struggles to bring his head up to look. “Juan... I think so my friend. I think...

A penguin driving through the desert

started to have car trouble, so he decided to drive to the nearest mechanic to get his car checked out. After he dropped his car off, he decided to walk down the block to get some ice cream, since it was a particularly hot day. Unfortunately, he was only able to devour about half of his vanilla cone...

A man has been stuck on a desert island for 10 years

when he notices an unusual speck in the distance.

“It’s certainly not a ship,” he thinks to himself.

As the speck gets closer and closer the man starts to rule out the possibility that it’s a small boat or even a raft.

Suddenly, emerging from the surf, is a beautiful blonde woma...

Two balloons were floating around a desert.

One said to the other, "look, a cactussssssssss..."

There's a single line of footprints in the desert

There's a single line of footprints in the desert. A man asks Jesus why there is only one set of footprints. Jesus replies "because sand people walk in single file to conceal their numbers"

3 men walk in the desert

They are thirsty and would do anything for a drink. Suddenly they see a giant slide and a sign next to it. It reads, “Slide down the slides and shout the name of the drink you want and when you reach the bottom of the slide, there will be a pool of it

The first man slides down the slide and ...

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Three men are stranded on a desert island. (Long) (NSFW)

Three men wash up on a desert island. They don’t know each other and don’t know where they are. Soon, they get very hungry. They go into the island to see if they can find any food. They happen to stumble upon an enormous cache of perfectly ripe fruits. They eat to their heart’s delight, and when th...

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There were four men starving in a desert

One of them died.

The first man says "how shall we split him up to eat?"

The second man says "I support Liverpool so I'll eat the liver"

The third man says "I support heartlypool so I'll eat the heart"

The first man says "I support arsenal, but I'm not very hungry right n...

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3 men are walking through the desert when they stumble across a lamp. They dust it off and a Genie pops out, the genie says "I will grant each of you 3 wishes!"

The first man says "I wish for a million dollars!" "Alright" says the Genie and just like that a million dollars appears at the man's feet.

The second man says "I wish for unlimited money" "Alright" says the Genie "Check your bank account" The man checks on his phone and sure enough there's a...

What do you call a witch in the desert?

A sandwitch

What do you call a frog that lives in the desert

A camel toad

2 men are stranded in the desert, dying of thirst.

As they walk with all hope lost, one of them spots a well in the middle of the desert.

'Look, a well!' - said the first man

'There is no way that well has water... ' - replied the second man

'We should check if it has water. Look, let's drop that rock into the well to check whet...

An Irishman wanders the desert...

Stumbling upon a magic lantern, he gives it a rub and a genie pops out...

Genie:
Hello stranded Irishman, thank you for setting me free! As a reward, I will grant you three wishes... What will be your first wish?

Irishman:
Oh hello genie! Well I’m awfully parched, and I miss Ir...

A man is walking in the desert in Saudi Arabia.

As he's walking, a local man on a camel begins to come into view. The tourist turned and could see that a woman was walking behind the local man on the camel. The tourist asked the man:

"Who is that?"

"That is my wife," he replied.

"Wouldn't it be kinder to let her ride the came...

A man was stuck at a desert island for 20 years. One day, he saw something approaching.

With joy, the man looked at the approaching blur.
At first, it appeared to be a ship, then a boat, then a raft and ultimately a woman in a diver's suit came out of the water.
They talked. The woman asked, "How long since you last had a cigarette ?"
The man said, "20 years !"
The woman un...

The Sahara Desert drifts into a bar and the bartender says,

"Long time no sea."

Two Americans were walking in the Arabian desert one morning, when they come across a mosque.

They hadn't had food or water for days, and thought maybe the people in the mosque would give them some.

"Ok, Joe, we will tell these people we are Muslims, and maybe they will give us some food and something to drink. You'll be Hassan, and I'll be Muhammed", said Roger.

"No way, man. ...

Why did it take Moses 40 years to cross the desert?

He got paid by the hour.

Two cats are walking through a desert..

..after a long while one of them turns and says, "Dude, I don't get this litter box".

A married woman is walking through a desert cave one day when she comes across a magical genie lamp

She rubs the lamp, and a genie comes out. "Thank you for getting me out of that cursed lamp! I... I was so crowded in there. Listen, to make it up to you, I'll give you three wishes".

The woman is overjoyed. She jumps up and down excitedly, but then the genie speaks again.

"However, I...

A man wandering the desert, finds a lamp...

Skeptical, he rubs the lamp and to his surprise a Genie pops out and says:

"You get three wishes, go."

The man thought for a moment before speaking

"You know, I've thought of the perfect first wish!"
He mulled it over a momemt longer before spouting
"I want the greatest ...

A man walking in a desert was about to starve to death, when he suddenly...

Died of thirst.

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A mexican, a chinese guy and an american are all in a desert...

The mexican has a giant leaf, the chinese guy has a hat and the american has a car door.

The mexican says he likes to fan himself when it gets hot.

The chinese guy says he likes to wear his hat.

And the american finally says that he likes to roll down the window.

&#x...

Three men are driving in the desert when their car breaks down.

The men decide that they must split up and survive on their own for the best chances. They are then forced to abandon the car. To be fair, they decide that they can each take one part of the car to help them.

The first man decides that he wants to take the car battery, he is an engineer and ...

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A man lost in the desert with his camel

Every day he gets lonelier and lonelier, when it gets to the point he decides he is going to have sex with his camel, but he couldn't reach, so every day he would try and try again to have sex with his camel standing on hills and on rocks but the camel would just try to run away. until one day, he c...

Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States , wandering aimlessly and starving.

They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says………

“Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon, I theenk.”

“Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon. ”

With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tr...

A penguin is driving through the desert

When his car starts to give him trouble. The lights start flashing and the dials go out of control, so he puts the car in neutral and rides it out to the nearest gas station.

He asks the gas station attendant "Can you fix my car? It's really no place for a penguin to be stuck in the deser...

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A man is walking through the desert

He sees one Indian man laying down on the ground naked with a boner. The man asks
“What are you doing?” And the Indian replies
“Oh I’m just checking my clock.” So then the man keeps walking until he finds another Indian naked with a boner. The man asks again “What are you doing?” then the Indi...

Neil Armstrong and his team were training for moon expedition at a desert and met an old Native American

The native American asked : Can you do me a favour?

Neil Armstrong : Of course, what do you want?

Native : Please pass this important message to our holy spirits living on the moon

The native American started uttering the message in his tribal language and asked Neil Armstrong t...

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Poetry contest

At a poetry contest where the contestants are given one word they must create a poem from, there was competition between a well regarded poet and a redneck. The word given to them was “Timbuktu” and the poet was to go first.

Almost immediately the poet starts speaking..

“Slowly across...

Why don't Antifa like the desert?

The heat is oppressive.

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An Elephant And a Camel Meet in the Desert.

The Elephant asks: "Lol what are those boobs for on your back?"

The Camel responds: "Keep talking with that dick in your face"

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3 Englishmen get stranded in the desert when they come across a camel and decide how to divide it up.

“I’ll have the chest of course” said the man from Manchester.

“I’ll be eating the liver” said the bloke from Liverpool.

“I’m not hungry” said the guy from Arsenal.

A cowboy and a red Indian are walking through the desert...

After a short time the Indian stops the cowboy before dropping to his knees and placing his ear to the ground. Upon standing the Indian says firmly "Buffalo come"

"That's amazing" says the cowboy, "How can you tell that?"

The Indian replies...

"Sticky face"

A guy, a pig, and a dog are the only survivors of a terrible shipwreck, and they find themselves stranded on a desert island.

After being there for awhile, they get into a ritual of going to the beach every night to watch the sun go down.

One particular evening, the sky was red with beautiful cirrus clouds, the breeze was warm and gentle -- in short, a perfect night for romance! Well, that pig started looking bette...

3 men find a genie’s lamp in a huge desert. The genie tells them they each get one wish.

The first guy wishes to be with his family.

POOF

He’s gone.

The second guy wishes to be on an island.

POOF

He’s gone

Third guy wishes for his friends to be with him.

POOF

The first two guys are back.

A penguin is driving down a desert road...

...when he hears a strange sound coming from his engine.

At the next town he pulls into the service shop and asks for help.

The mechanic says, “It’s gonna take about 20 minuets to check this out. You look pretty hot, you should go get an Ice Cream at the shop across the street to coo...

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The Jews wandered in the desert for 40 years.

Who the hell gave them such lousy directions?

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A man is lost in the desert...

A man is lost wandering in the desert. After pushing as hard as he could, his horse has died, and he is near to death himself, when along comes a missionary. The missionary, having come extra prepared in case he should come across a poor weary soul, has brought enough food, water, and an extra horse...

A man is riding his donkey in the desert looking for treasure.

They go 5 miles, and pass an oasis, the donkey looks back, and the man goes,

“Just a little longer, Jackass.

They go 10 miles, and pass another oasis, the donkey looks back, and the man goes,

“Just a little longer, Jackass.”

They go 15 miles, and pass another oasis, the...

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A man was riding through the desert on his camel.

A man was riding through the desert on his camel. He had been traveling so long that he felt the need to have sex. Obviously there were no women in the desert, so the man turned to his camel.

When he tried to position himself to have sex with his camel, the camel ran away. The man ran to catc...

A man is stranded in the desert when he comes across a genie's lamp. He rubs it and the genie grants him just one wish. The man said, "I could die happy here, if I could just get..."

... one more 's'.

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An Army Captain is assigned to a remote desert post in Iraq

During inspection, he notices a camel tied up outside the barracks. He asks the soldier, "why is that camel there?"

The soldier says: "There are 250 men here and no women. Sometimes men get urges."

A month later the Captian has urges himself. He puts the ladder behind the camel, drops ...

3 woman are stuck on a desert island, 50km for the mainland

The first one a Brunette decides to swim for it, she gets 5 kilometers before getting tiered and drowning. The second woman a redhead decides to swim as well, she gets 15 kilometers before getting tired and drowning. The last woman a blond also decides to swim, she decides to be smart and not go out...

What do you call a cat in the desert?

Sandy Claws

Jesus saw a crying old man while walking in a desert.

He came closer and asked what problem is.

Old man: I’m looking for my son, but I’m gonna lose my hope.

Jesus pitied the man and said, “let’s look for your son together.”

After some time, Jesus asked him that if he has some birthmark or else to recognize him more easily.
...

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A man is on a private safari in the middle of the desert.

It is just him and a guide. They’re speeding along in a car, looking out for wild animals. Suddenly, the man desperately needs to pee, and so they stop at an oasis for him to relieve himself.

As he’s peeing, he is distracted by a herd of beasts in the distance, As he is gazing off to the sid...

A guy is walking through the desert when he meets three men going the other way.

One is drinking out of a water bottle, one is looking at his phone and the third one is dragging a car door. He stops to talk to them.

"Why are you guys out here?" he asked.

"Our car broke down in the middle of the desert, so we started walking to see if we could find help. I figured I...

How do you find Will Smith in the desert?

You look for the fresh prints.

2 Arabian men are riding camels in the desert...

2 Arabian men are riding camels in the desert.

The first Arabian man barely has to stop for water for his camel and the other Arabian man has to constantly stop for water for his camel.

One day, they reach a town and they both go to the water trough.

The one Arabian man asked, ...

Two guys are lost in the desert.

They wonder around for several days when the first guy stops and starts sniffing the air.

"You smell that...?" He says to his friend, who begins sniffing.

"Is that... bacon?" The friend responds.

"It is! Look!" He points off in the distance to a large plant. "Its a bacon-tree!"<...

I once got trapped on a desert island

To be honest, my top 5 favorite albums didn’t help one god damn bit

A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde are walking in the desert...

A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde are walking in the desert after a plane crash. To lighten the mood the brunette suggests a game of 'make a wish'. The redhead goes first and wishes for a never ending glass of water so that they'll never get thirsty on their journey. The brunette goes next and say...

So, there's a man crawling through the desert.

He'd decided to try his SUV in a little bit of cross-country travel, had great fun zooming over the badlands and through the sand, got lost, hit a big rock, and then he couldn't get it started again. There were no cell phone towers anywhere near, so his cell phone was useless. He had no family, his ...

An American biker decides to travel the world...

Once upon a time there lived an American biker named Rick. Now, Rick loved to ride his motorcycle, but was tired of driving up and down the same roads, day after day.

One morning, he woke up, and decided to travel the world. So he saved up some money, got on a plane, along with his trusty Ha...

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Three American men are lost in the desert...

...After many hours without food or water, they are relieved to find a large tent filled with amazing food, clean water, and lots of beautiful women.

They partake of the food, water, and women without hesitation, and soon return to a healthier condition.

A while later, the tent owner ...

Two Americans were trekking in a desert.

Dehydrated and hungry, they walked into a mosque.
The Imam asked for their names.
Mark thought: “Maybe it’s wiser to pretend to be a Muslim.” So he replied: “My name is Ahmed.”
Sam said: “My name is Sam.”
The Imam called his servant over, who handed Sam some food and water.
He then t...

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A black man is lost in a desert

A black man is lost in a desert and just before death God comes before him and asks him what he desires at this moment.

The black man says:" I want lots of water, lots of women on me and I want to be white."

God says:" You ask and thou shall recieve."

And God turns him into a t...

Penguin in the Desert

A penguin is driving his car through the desert when steam starts pouring out from under the hood. Luckily, he sees a gas station up ahead. The penguin pulls into the station and while the mechanic checks out his car in the garage, the penguin goes into the mini-market for an iced cream. As he walks...

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Four men are stuck on a desert island...

Four men are stuck on a desert island, but one of the men suddenly drops dead.

The remaining three men decides the best way to survive is that they eat his dead body, and that they should decide who gets what by which football team they support.

The 1st guy says: "I support Liverpool, ...

An Englishman, Scotsman and Donald Trump are in the Sahara desert (see, I’ve changed it so it’s current)...

The Englishman is carrying an umbrella, the Scot is holding a cucumber and Trump is carrying a car door.
A Bedouin approaches and asks why the Englishman has an umbrella in the desert. The man replies. “Well, when it gets really hot, I put up my brolly and I can keep cool in the shade.”
The Be...

An Arabic man is helplessly wandering through the desert when he comes across a Jewish tie salesman.

"Water! Water!" The Arabic man cries.

"I have no water, only ties. Would you like to purchase a tie?" Replies the Jewish tie salesman.

"No!" Exclaims the Arabic man, "I need water! Tell me where there's water!"

"I know where there is water. 20 miles east, there is a village w...

A car breaks down in the desert. The driver goes in search of help, carrying the car door.

So that if it gets too hot he can open the window.

The thirsty criminal

My grandpa told me this gem of a joke. Here it goes...

A fleeing criminal, desperate to escape the police, runs into the desert with hardly any water. Very soon, he runs out of drinking water, and hours later, he is already plodding under the merciless desert sun.

He is close to desper...

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A caravan is crossing the desert. The elephant, walking beside the camel, asks "why are your tits on your back?"

The camel, slightly bemused, replies "What a strange question coming from someone with a dick on his face!"

An Irishman and an Englishman are shipwrecked together on a desert island.

Waking up on the shore, all they find is a bottle of fresh water from the boat they were on.

"We should save this until we come up with a plan. We each get half, agreed?," said the Englishman.

"Agreed," replied the Irishman.

Night fell and the two men went to sleep. Upon...

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded in the desert.

Their car broke down so they all agree to grab something from the car to help them survive. The Brunette shuffles around and grabs food. The Redhead rummages through the trunk and pulls out water. They are talking saying that it’s to prevent them from starving or becoming dehydrated while they wait ...

A Bridge in the Desert

In 2006, the president of Poland met with former US President Bush at a meeting of NATO.

While there, the Polish president asked Bush for a favor. Looking to help an ally, Bush asked what he needed.

"Well, you see in Poland we are having a serious crisis of morale," he began. "You see...

A Saudi couple and their camel are in the desert

They have been walking for days now and the journey is long and hard. One day the camel says to the man
“Oh please can I rest? This journey is too hard for me”
So the man pulls out a gun, holds it up to the camels head and says “camel going once”
The camel then immediately starts walking a...

A physicist, a chemist and an economist are stranded on a desert island ...

... and all they have to eat are cans of food and they're discussing the best way to open them.

The physicist says, let's not overthink this - just bash them open with rocks!

The chemist says, "No, we need to create a fire anyway and we can simply use the heat to cause the cans to burs...

An Arab is lost in the desert, dying of thirst

As his eyesight begins to fade and he collapses into the ground, his fingers come across a stoppered flask in the sand. Hoping for water, he pops it open, only to see a swirl of smoke issued forth, coalescing into a giant figure.

"My deliverer!" booms the figure. "I am a long imprisoned Djinn...

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A man was lost in the desert

With nobody by his side apart from his trusty camel. The man walks miles and miles, maintaining his needs by eating the flesh of dead animals and drinking from the oasis' scattered across the lands. However the one basic need he is unable to satisfy is the need for sex. After several days the man ca...

What do people use to conceal themselves in the desert?

Camelflage

A plane crashes in the Australian desert, and an American tourist is the only survivor...

He survives in the desert for days with severe injuries before being discovered by locals and brought to a small community hospital. Relieved at his good fortune, he passes out until the next day.

When he wakes up, he sees that his wounds have become infected, he is connected to multiple mach...

A truck driver is heading west across the Arizona desert. He has been driving all night, and as the sun starts to rise, he feels the need to stop and commune with nature.

He pulls to the side of the road, parks, and walks out into the sage brush.
As he is standing there, looking around at the beauty of the early morning, he notices a lever sticking out of the ground. After a few moments, he walks over, walks all the way around, and then reaches out to grasp the le...

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3 men get stranded on a desert island

After wandering around a while, they are found by some tribesmen. The natives take them back to their hut. The chief tells them, "Go out into the jungle and collect 10 pieces of fruit."

The first guy returns with 10 apples, and the chief says "Now shove them all up your ass without showing an...

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A horny dude lost in a desert

To let off his sexual frustration, he tries to mount a camel from back but was brutally kicked away. Apparently the camel was not amused by what he had to offer.

Sitting there with nothing but frustration \(comparable to that of an engineering student or a computer grad\), to his amusement h...

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A man rides through the desert on the back of a camel

After days of travel he starts to get horny and extremely pent up. So he gets the thought: "Might as well do it with my camel".
With that goal in mind, he grabs a shovel and starts piling up sand behind the camel so he could reach it, but every time he got on top of the pile, the camel walked out...

How to tell what part of Washington you're in: Forest is west, desert is east...

Swamp is DC.

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A man is lost in the desert without food and water

Over a dune, he sees a cave. Delighted, he rushes in, seeking shelter from the scorching sun. As his eyes acclimate to the cave’s light, he sees a pedestal surrounded by light deep in the cave. Upon the pedestal lies a slice of peanut butter toast. The man rushes towards the slice, but 1/3rd of the ...

A man is walking in the desert when he hears a sound...

"36. 36. 36. 36."
He follows the sound and finds a man walking around a well repeating this number with a robotic voice and step and a crazy look.
He shouts "Hello!" but the man doesn't respond and just keeps going on...
"36. 36. 36."
He moves closer and says hello again but the man does...

There is a penguin driving through the desert...

when his A/C suddenly stops working. So he decides to stop at the next town. He pulls into a mechanic's garage and tells him the situation. He asks if there is anywhere he can go to cool down while waiting. The mechanic tells the penguin about a grocery store across the street, with a frozen food s...

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2 cowboys are riding along in the desert. (NSFWish)

They ride past an Indian laying on the ground with his pecker in the air. The first cowboy asks, "What's he doing that for?" The second says, " It's how they tell time." The first one doesn't believe him and rides up next to the Indian and asks, "Excuse me, what time is it?" The Indian states, "I...

2 Christians are lost in the Arabian desert

The first day is hot, and they're miserable after running out of food and water. The night is surprisingly cold and even worse than the day. The second day and night are even worse.

On the third morning, hotter than the past 2 days, they see a mosque. "We're saved!" exclaims one. The othe...

Three blonde dudes drive into the desert

When they are in the middle of the day, their car breaks down. For their hike to town, they each decide to take one thing with them.

One blonde takes a tire. The second bloke takes a seat. The last blonde takes one of the car doors.

The first man says to the other two “I’m bringing th...

The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert

After they got their tent all set up, they fell sound asleep.

Some hours later, Tonto wakes The Lone Ranger and says, "Kemo Sabi, look towards sky, what you see?"

The Lone Ranger replies, "I see millions of stars."

"What that tell you?" asked Tonto.

The Lone Ranger ponder...

3 men set out to travel across the desert

3 men are traveling across the desert and decide they’ll all only take one item to travel light. Man 1 is carrying a canteen, man 2 is carrying a lunch box, and man 3 is carrying just the door from his car.
Man 2 asks man 1 “what’s in your canteen?” He says “water. We get about a mile through thi...

I don't understand why people starve when stranded in deserts...

There is the sand which is everywhere.

A man is driving to a big city, but he has to go through a desert. [Long]

His car beaks down on the way and he realizes there is no way for him to fix it. He starts to walk when he sees a snake rise out of a hole. The snake speaks to him.

“I see you are tired. I will grant you three wishes. The first is free, but the second comes with secrecy and the third with a f...

Why do CSGO terrorists hate the desert?

Because they don't want de dust 2 get in their eyes.

A scrawny little fellow turned up at a lumber company looking for work.

'Just give me a chance to show you what I can do,' he said to the head lumberjack. 'All right,' said the boss. 'Take this axe and cut fired that oak tree.' Five minutes later the man was back. 'I've cut it down,' he says, 'and split it into lumber.' The boss couldn't believe his eyes. 'Where on eart...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Three guys crash on a desert island...

Three guys crash on a desert island and are captured by the locals. They are brought to the kind and given a challenge.

“You must go out and find 10 pieces of the same fruit and return. I will give you the second challenge then.”

They go out and after about an hour, the first guy come...

An engineer, a physician and an economist are in the middle of the desert with only a tin can. [long]

They are starving and far away from civilisation, but they have no way to open it.

The engineer says:
To open the can we need to build this specific machine! It will do the job quickly and efficiently!

The physician and economist mock him:
Yeah, right, we’re in the middle of the ...

A man is riding through the desert on his horse...…..

.….The rider is like "Man! I'm so hungry I could eat a horse!" Then suddenly the horse goes "Meow!" and starts licking himself.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A man took a job on an oil rig in the desert.

He was settling in well but after a couple of weeks felt the normal urge every man has and went to talk to his supervisor.

"I really like the job boss but I need some female company"

The boss replies "That's easy Joe, see those Camels over there, when your off your shift feel free to u...

Two Mexicans have been lost in the desert for weeks.

Two Mexicans have been lost in the desert for weeks. At death's door, they see a tree in the distance. As they get nearer, they see that it's draped with rasher upon rasher of bacon; crispy bacon; life giving, nearly raw, juicy bacon. "Hey Pepe', says the first Mexican, 'ees a bacon tree! We're save...

The Lobe Ranger and Tonto are riding in the desert

When they come to a high hill they can see that they are surrounded by wild indians on all sides.
The Lone Ranger says “This doesn’t look good my friend, they look fierce and out for blood. What should we do?”
Tonto reply’s “What do you mean “we” white man?”

This is Armenian Radio; our listeners asked us: “Is it possible to build socialism in Sahara desert?”

We are answering: “Possible, but you will end up with a shortage of sand.”

A man stranded in the desert wanders into a store

A man stranded in the desert wanders into a store and says to the store clerk in a mumbled voice, “water...water...please...water”

The clerk says, “I’m sorry sir but we don’t have any water here, we only sell ties. If you want water, there is a restaurant about 10 miles north of here.”
...