Given the terms “crab”, “tuna”, “lobster”, and “Chinese guy caught in an avalanche of boulders”, which does not fit?
Ans: “tuna”. The other 3 are crushed asians.
How amazing is that scene from The Last Jedi where Rey makes the boulders float..
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
NSFW: A man is exploring a cave when two large boulders fall on his leg, pinning him to the ground. A spider is the only one to hear his cries for help.
“I am the elder spider of this cave and will grant you one wish!” he says. The man makes his wish and the spider calls all his brethren to watch. Thousands of spiders gather around, rubbing their hind legs and smacking their mandibles. The man is confused and a little scared but figures the sp...
Figured out my million dollar idea. It’s a shampoo specifically for men’s genitalia. (nsfw)
I’m calling it Head And Boulders!
A Secluded Beach Spot
I was at the beach with my wife the other day and we took a walk around an area with some pretty big rock bluffs and boulders and things. It was really nice, and surprisingly secluded for the area. Nobody was around but a bunch of seagulls. Terns, actually, my wife corrected me.
We find a spo...
Obama, Oprah, Trump and a little girl are on a plane. The engines fail...
... the pilots have already parachuted out the plane. The four mentioned are the only ones remaining on the plane. But there are only three parachutes.
Oprah quickly steps forward and says to the little girl; "I'm taking a parachute. I'll build a school for girls in your honour, it'll benefi...
[Long] Rabbi Goldman, World Traveller, comes to a lovely island in the South Pacific.
It's a beautiful place, lush and vibrant, and it's home to a tribe called the Trids. Goldman makes a good impression on them, and they're a very welcoming people already, so it' s not long before they're having a nice cookout to welcome him.
While they're eating, Rabbi Goldman looks inland, a...
The curse of the coffin
Three men, Gary, Dan, and Job, grew up together as best friends. They dreamed of one day becoming rich and would do anything to attain wealth. One day, as they were sitting in the local bar, they overheard another group of men discussing the long lost buried treasure of Captain Sleazybeard. The thre...
Millions of years ago, there was no such thing as the wheel.
One day, some primitive guys were watching their wives drag a dead mastodon to the food & fire area. It was exhausting work; the guys were getting tired just watching.
Then they noticed some large, smooth, rounded boulders and they had a great idea! They could sit on top of the boulders a...
A man goes to the circus and sees a line of people.
A man goes to the circus and sees a line of people. It extends far into the distance. The man walks up to a person in the line and asks him,
"Sir, what is this line for?"
The person replies,
"Go to the front."
So the man walks up the line. and he keeps walking, and walkin...
A chemical engineer, a mechanical engineer and a software engineer are diving in a car....
... when they begin down a hill and the brakes fail! The car goes faster and faster and eventually veers off the road through a guard rail, through some woods, narrowly missing numerous trees and boulders and miraculously comes to a stop in some bushes with no one being injured. After catching the...
There was a man who died while going on a hike.
He saw a sign by the foot of a high cliffside and went to read it. It said "Watch out for falling boulders." He died of cancer.