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Mineral Jokes

If olive oil comes from olives and mineral oil comes from minerals...

What does baby oil come from?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"Sir, we're mining too many useless minerals."

Hitler: "Mine less then"

*Grammar Nazi bursts in*

"MINE FEWER."

*Hitler looks over* "Yes?"

[EDIT](http://www.reddit.com/r/AntiJokes/comments/2dmxah/sir_were_mining_too_many_useless_minerals/)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Suffering from a mineral deficiency? The only mineral you're going to need,

is some cocktanite

The KGB, the FBI and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at catching criminals.

The Secretary General of the UN decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.

The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations ...

Pickup lines for all of the mineral ladies :)

If you come home with me theres a high chance you will be (Mg,Fe2+)2(Mg,Fe2+)5Si 8O 22(OH) 2

What type of mineral makes people sneeze?

Gesundhite

Worms

Four earthworms are placed in four separate test tubes:

1st in beer
2nd in wine
3rd in whiskey
4th in mineral water

The next day, the teacher shows the results:

The 1st worm in beer, dead.

The 2nd in wine, dead.

The 3rd in whiskey, dead.

The 4th in ...

I hate people who trade with minerals

They take everything for granite

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three expectant mothers are sitting in the doctor's office, knitting... [warning: offensive!]

\[I once killed a party with this joke. You have been warned!\]

Three expectant mothers are sitting in the doctor's office, knitting.

The first mother puts down her knitting, picks up her handbag, pulls out a bottle of pills, takes one, then resumes knitting. She sees the other two mot...

Why don't local government prioritize the concerns of laborers who collect minerals in caves?

They're only miner issues.

My friend started a company that digs rocks and minerals..

He's just mining his own business.

Why can't you purchase minerals by the gallon?

They only come in quarts(z)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Told my wife we’d have to stop sleeping together if I get this job with a mineral extraction company.

Yeah, in most states it’s illegal to have sex with a miner.

What do you call the mineral found in teeth and tooth enamel?

Apatite.

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