Why do PC builders hate adoption?

Because they dont want a pre-build

Why Apple doesn't market their devices as PCs?

Because they are **not** **your personal computers**.

Darn... my PC hangs :/

I didn't know it was Non-Binary!

What's it called when you try to appear PC by conspicuously including little people in your company's ad material

Tolkienism

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When I was young my mom grounded me for having a file on pc with the name "boobies pics"

I never understood why bird watching was wrong

What types of large PC's do McDonalds workers use?

Big Macs

What happens if you severely overclock a PC?

It goes up in frames!

What's the difference between a woman and a PC from 1995?

A woman doesn't accept 3 1/2 inch floppies.

I was going to make a joke about Bill and Melinda Gates’ divorce today, but I stopped myself...

It’s not really PC

My girlfriend gave me an ultimatum, her or my PC

She’s now homeless

I left my PC on all night and when I woke up, it was freezing

Turns out, I left the Windows open.

PC Fan Noises

So I just asked me computer guy why my computer fan makes so much noise when my computer is just starting up. He said not to worry, the fan's just taking a second to get it's bearings.

Why couldn't the PC gamer stop crying?

He refused to be consoled.

Had an issue remotely connecting to an Australian PC.

Connection was blocked by the firewall.

I just got a water cooler for my PC

not a fan.

Just made up a joke and it’s brilliant! What does Donald trump and a Mac book pro have in common?

They aren’t PC

What do you call a PC made of legos?

Bricked

The Catholic church released a fun PC game which takes place in the garden of Eden. You play as Eve and Adam is hiding from you. Your goal is to hunt him down with a slingshot.

It's a first person shooter.

My friend is pretty sick and tired of PC culture

I tried to console him but he didn't want his hand held

Does anyone know the PC term for short people?

...or do yall also struggle with gnomenclature

If you're working from home on a laptop or PC, make sure you wear gloves and a face mask.

You don't want to catch one of those computer viruses.

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What's the difference between my PC and Paul Walker?

I actually give a shit when my PC crashes.

Why do Macs run hotter than PCs?

Because they don't have Windows.

This one might be a little non-PC, but...

What would an anti-mentally-handicapped people protester group would yell?


"DOWN WITH TOURETTE!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This "PC" crap is getting ridiculous... A door greeter at my local Walmart got fired for wishing two little girls a Merry Christmas!

I mean, it was August and he wasn't wearing pants, but still...

Side scrolling games on pc are all the same...

... kind of d-pressing

I was playing games on my pc and my cat kept jumping onto my desk.

I had to put him down.

I got fired from PC World today.

A guy came in the store and asked me what was the best thing for finding your ancestors.


“Probably a shovel” was not the right answer.

I tried to play the Titanic game on my PC

But as soon as I hit the iceberg, it crashed

What kind of PC sings really well?

A Dell

I hate the PC culture we live in these days.

Can't a guy just use a Playstation without getting called a "peasant"?

My son was so upset when he didn't get a gaming pc for his birthday

luckily, this playstation was able to..........console him

If Rolex had an app on PC what would be Its file name?

Rol.exe



Sorry for the trash pun, thought about it while walking in front of rolex

A duck walks into a PC repair store...(long)

Just an ordinary day in life, without any sense for anything being unusual about its presence there, the duck waddles up to the counter, looks at the clerk and asks:
(duck) do you have breead?
(clerk) uh... No. This is a PC repair shop. We don't sell bread.
Dejected, the duck waddles back...

My friend recently was recently thinking about going from from PC gaming to Console gaming. I told him it was time for the Switch

No pun Nintendo

I tried teaching my mom how to build a PC

But all it did was make my motherboard

Why can't PC gamers use Uber?

Too many incompatible drivers.

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My wife found a lot of animal porn on my pc - but I think I got away with it!

I blamed the dog.

How are PCs different from woman?

I know how to turn a PC on.

If I paint my PC black

will it run faster or stop working?

My PC Died today and my friend offered me to lend me his PS4 while i waited for replacements parts.

........But i was simply unconsolable

For PC games, the harder you click the more damage you do.

I need to replace my mouse.

Time Stands Still for Enthusiast PC Owners...

They are so over clocks!

Why didn't the pc gamer cross the street ?

Because he's morbidly obese

What do you call a PC that falls in the ocean?

A Dell rolling in the deep

How Do You Know Someone Is A PC Gamer?

You don't, they tell you.

My mom entered my room and found me all stressed out facing my PC.

"Having trouble with your computer?" she asked.
"Yes, it seems not to find the new printer," I replied.

My mum looked round my room then replied, "I'm not surprised. Look how messy your room is."

What does a homeless person do when using a PC for the first time?

He searches through the trash bin.

Why did the Army Intelligence Officer smash the PC?

He heard there was intel inside.

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TIFU- I watched porn at full volume on the work PC. Masturbated thrice and spoke to 3 female colleagues while doing the deed.

Thank god I work from home.

Do you know how PC gamers always can beat console players if they play against each other?

They press the Win-key.

So I came home today to find a homeless guy munching biscuits over my PC cabinet.

When I confronted him he said he'd clear the cookies later.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Fuck you I quit

Boss: I understand, but we will need your password so we can login to your pc and reset it.

Me: “Fuck you I quit”

Boss: “here just write it down on this piece of paper for me.

Me: ...scribble scribble “Fuck you i quit”... hand the piece of paper back to my boss.

Boss: ...

I installed anti-virus on my PC

Now the damned thing has autism.

PC is getting way out of hand. You can't even say black paint anymore.

Instead it's gotta be "Jamal, please paint."

The other day I found this literal fossil of a PC...

It had about a trilobyte of storage on it!

Just developed an app that let's me condense really long paragraphs into a couple of lines.

I've always struggled with being able to express myself in fewer words and hence had to find something that would help me So I booted up my pc and got to coding until I finally did it! I successfully created an app that reads through all my typed and creates the most optimal sentence to summarise ev...

As a dog lover and PC player...

I obviously buy only To-Shiba hard drives.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When someone ask me if my PC is good I tell them that I actually have a NASA supercomputer...

Because everytime I try to do something, it seems like its loading the entire fucking universe

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My pc suddenly died while on a trip to japan

it appeared to have committed cpuku

I heard Disney is making a princess that's more pc to viewers.

She's said to resemble Rapunzel. Except instead of letting down her hair, she lets down everyone in her life.

Why did Eric Clapton switch from PC to Mac?

He had a bad experience with windows.

Why was the pc gamer denied entry into the nightclub?

It was exclusive.

This is a joke that from several decades ago, and was recently shared with me

The local government just finished paving a highway, and is hiring crews to paint stripes down the middle. He hires a crew of 5 guys (the og joke says mexican but thats not pc) and one (used to be polish) guy (again, not pc).

The first day of painting goes by, and the crew of 5 paints two mil...

So the UK has introduced the “rule of 6” for social groups...

Now if you attempt to add another party member they will be sent to the PC.

A girl is talking to a robot...

A girl is talking to a robot and says something that could be considered offensive towards robots. She says, "Sorry, I'm not trying to be robophobic," and the robot says, "Thanks, but you don't need to be so PC."

Why did Jesus only play his favorite game on PC?

Because it wasn’t cross-platform

How did Germany raise its GDP pc. during WW2?

Reduce the capita

Sign on the door of a PC repair shop

Theory is when something doesn't work, but you know why.

Practice is when something works, but you don't know why.

Here we combine practice and theory - nothing works and we have no idea why.

What's the difference between a Mac user and a PC user

Mac users command, PC users control

My addiction to computer gaming started when my family bought a PC in the 90's...

I guess that was my Gateway drug.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

People call me a Grammar Nazi. So un-PC!

I prefer Alt-Write.

What do PC Master Race people identify as politically?

The Alt-Tab.

Why don't pc gamers get laid

Because they're micro-soft

This new fad about Battle Royale PC games...

Give it 2 weeks.

The people at my school are very PC and its so annoying

I can't go five minutes without someone asking me if I'd like to update windows

No Longer PC

It's no longer Politically Correct to call someone a "tweaker".

You now call them "Methican American".

One evening when I was playing on my console..

One evening when I was playing on my console I noticed my girlfriend, who was sitting right next to me on the couch, looking all gloomy and sad.

Naturally I asked her what was wrong but she didn't answer.

So I turned of my console and she goes "why did you stop ?". I told her there's s...

How to check whether you have a fast PC...

Click anywhere on your desktop (not on icon).

Quickly press on keyboard Ctrl+A then Enter.

So you will know.

Why was the Windows PC broke?

It ran out of cache.

Steve Jobs and Trump had one thing in common, both hated the PC culture

Political correctness and pancreatic cancer.

Where are PCs formed?

In the computerus.

TIL there's a new keyboard shortcut in the PC version of GTA V which when you press it will cause your character to kill minorities.

Alt-right

The PC term for Christmas

C:\hristmas

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

gross and not PC, but funny...

A guy walks into a brothel, and the madam greets him at the counter. He explains that he would like to have a go, but he is a little short on cash. The madam points to a very plain looking woman sitting in the parlor, and says "Well, that's Brenda. She will cost you $20." The guy explains that he re...

I only have a PC so I can't play all the new exclusives.

I am just inconsolable.

People are talking about how culture is too pc nowadays...

But everyone I know has a Mac

[long] My company is locked down and I am required to work from home

I'm used to working in an open office space so this is a huge change for me. In order to make the transition as easy as possible, I have prepared my home office so remind me of work.

* I've purchased a piece of Limburger cheese and placed it on a plate in the middle of the room to remind me o...

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