I can make digital art and canvas art easily.

But when it comes to paper, that's where I draw the line.

What did the digital clock say to the grandfather clock?...

Look grandpa, no hands!!

Spent some cryptocurrency to take digital possession of an image of Gandalf killing the Balrog of Morgoth...

My first non-fungible Tolkien.

There's nothing in the Guinness Book about digital DJs.

They don't hold any records.

Superman lost all of his money on a digital currency scheme

It was his cryptonite.

New digital LOTR trading card JPEGs for sale!!!

Non Fungible Tolkien’s

Digital Milk

What do you call a computer mouse for a cow?...

a Moose!

My doctor asked if I wanted a digital prostate exam..

He didn't mention there were no electronics involved but now I get his point

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Husband goes to a police station, says ‘My wife is missing!’

Husband goes to a police station...
“My wife is missing! She went out yesterday and has not come home...”

Sergeant at Police Station:
“What is her height?”

Husband:
“Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall

Sergeant:
“Weight?”

Husband:
“Don't know. N...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

By tightly securing our Nuclear Arsenal through human, digital, mechanical and chemical means, we've been able to almost completely eliminate the risk of nuclear warhead explosions due to accidents or hostile attacks, however if these past four years have taught us something ...

... it's that we also need to equip our nukes with child locks.

How do you set your digital location to Skyrim?

You use NordVPN

I name my little guy after a digital game store

Say hello to Humble Bundle

What do you call two digital artists in a fight?

Graphic Violence

A man goes to buy a clock.

He's browsing in the clock shop. Suddenly he hears a little voice "Get digital you probably can't read analogue."
Startled, he looks around. Nobody is there.

A few minutes later, he hears another little voice "Your shoes belong in a museum!"
He spins around. Noone there.

As he ...

If your digital multimeter gives a bogus reading, try it again.

It's probably a Fluke.

My dad always brags that his was the first profession to go completely digital.

He’s a proctologist.

Tech company mission statements be like

We're a customer centric organization and we deliver the value of IOT, cloud, big data, blockchain, machine learning, and artificial intelligence by using design thinking to drive digital transformation for the connected enterprise.

Why were photographers so depressed before digital cameras were invented?

They spent too long processing the negatives.

What is an example of a Facebook paradox?

Discovering one of their user's is trying to build a bomb and having to decide between reporting him to the FBI or serving him ads for digital timers

I put scaffolding on my Hi-fi and steel girders on my digital radio.

Then my mom told me to stop reinforcing stereo types.

Millennials 20 years ago: Looting and polluting is not the way!

Millennials now: If I burn enough fossil fuels, maybe one of my random digital coins will become the preferred method of money laundering and make me rich.

What was the first form of digital storage?

gloves

This new digital currency is bitc*in!

Sorry. Bitcoin. It’s called bitcoin

It's hard to be a Buddhist in todays digital world, especially when it comes to emails.

No attachments.

I was getting a prostate examination when the doctor said "just so you know, this is a digital rectal exam".

"I understand. I know what is involved", I reply.

The doctor elaborates, "Just so you know, this exam will likely cause an erection".

I consider it for a moment and say, "That's fine, I've got it under control. It should be ok".

The doctor replies, "I wasn't talking about you."

The digital internet consists of 1s and 0s.

That explains alot about my Tinder matches.

what does a digital seagull wear to the beech

a beak.ini

I got one of those digital assistant things for Christmas, but I think it's defective

It refuses to open the pod bay doors.

How was the first digital sound created?

Someone snapped their fingers.

What do you call someone who specializes in selling insurance to hand models?

A digital security specialist.

My brother has been working on a belt with a built in digital clock.

Talk about a waist of time.

Why did Slovakia move to digital banking?

because they ran out of Czechs

Why aren't digital images of Bob Marley scalable?

Because they're all rasta graphics.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Government

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in California when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.

The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy,...

How come erotic games are always digital downloads?

I just want a physical release.

Why does the US military use digital camo?

They turned down the graphics for better performance

What do you call an anti-aircraft gun that shoots high-quality digital audio files?

A .flac gun

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Guys, if you get a digital rectal exam, you might feel like you're going to poop or going to orgasm.

You won't know whether you're coming or going.

After the invention of digital watches, the Swiss were in quite a bind...

Faced with what seemed like an existential threat to their national watch manufacturers, the Swiss Government send out pamphlets to foreign and domestic watch owners, asking them to sign up if they were interested in buying mechanical watches as gifts or fashion statements. Unfortunately, no one sig...

How do you catch a digital fish

Online

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So, I measured my penis with one of those digital rulers...

...Anyone know how to convert LOL into inches?

What do you call a digital tree?

All bark and no byte

Mr Peg, my Digital Photography teacher, just passed away.

Rest in peace Jay.

Have you seen my digital boat?

Oh wait, its syncing.

A cannibal had an unusual hobby.

He would save the extremities of bodies and use them to form works of art. The others began questioning him. "What's up with all these pictures made out of fingers and toes?" they asked. He responded, "Oh, I just really like working with digital media."

A digital pirate lost his leg.

He now has a JPEG leg to replace it.

I tried to make a clock with no battery for the digital clock competition

but it didn't count.

I phoned 999 and told the guy that two men had just broken into my house and stolen my CDs.

"Could you please give me a description of them?" the man asked.



"Certainly," I replied. "They're round plastic discs on which music or other digital information is stored."

Where does a digital photographer hang his work?

On a jpeg.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.