Compatible Jokes

Until she needed a kidney! Now I’ll be inside her forever

Your dog would offer you his kidney even if he only had one that worked.

Your cat would show up one morning with 37 kidneys in a sack and tell you to pick one.

It was a US Bee

For instance, if you volunteer your astrological sign in conversation, we can’t be friends.

The dollar sign

The bouncer lets the fox through but stops the explorer and says “sorry you are not compatible here.”

In two kingdoms, one had a prince and the other had a princess, they decided to have the prince and the princess and forge a single kingdom.

After the ceremony and the reception, the new couple retired to the princess’ quarters. Her father wanted to know if the new couple were compatible, so... read more

I know that, but I can't let you starve to death

- they didn't read each other's BIOS and found out out they weren't compatible so they just got drunk.

As the night progressed they tried to figure out a way to make it work. Finally the processor convinced the motherboard to come back to his place and see what would happen.

But then... read more

I peaked in 2008 and I'm not compatible with anyone else.

They go to the courthouse and the judge wants to hear why they want a divorce.

The woman starts and says that they are too compatible. She says how they like the same movies, music, sports, books, and hobbies.

The judge perplexed asks why this is grounds for divorce.

She says t... read more

Back when I had an Android I sure did but look at me now, my iPhone still has 27% lef........

So I went over, and she told she had just finished reading a Cosmo article called "which traffic sign are you?"



"Which traffic sign would your ideal woman be?" she asked me seductively.



I said " Ain't no particular sign I'm more compatible with I just want your extra t... read more

When the EMTs asked him if he was sure his blood was compatible, he replied,

"O, positive."

One. He or she just stands there holding the bulb out waiting for the world to revolve around them..... or goes out and buys an adapter first to make the bulb compatible!

God and Jesus are playing a game on their PlayStations. Jesus gets a text from Lucifer that he wants to join them online. Jesus asks God if that's okay. God knows that it won't work because Lucifer plays on X-box.

He tells Jesus that Lucifer isn't cross-compatible.

A renowned philosopher was held in high regard by his driver, who listened in awe as his boss lectured and answered difficult questions about the nature of things and the meaning of life.

Then, one day, the driver approached the philosopher and asked if he was willing to switch roles for just... read more

10. Anyone who took them would be more vulnerable to catching viruses.
9. The drugs would cause you to collapse into unconsciousness at random times. This would be known as a "system crash."
8. It would be hard to tell if you were taking the right drug, because Microsoft would make all its med... read more

Three engineers and a manager are sitting around some appliances to help make them smarthome compatible.

The first engineer turns his attention to the refrigerator, "We should connect this fridge to the internet and make it tell you when food is going bad, I will need an Intel i7 if we want t... read more

A programmer walks into a coffee shop on his lunch break with his pet, a black Labrador. He comes in with a scowl on his face and a furrowed brow, his expression showing a frustrated yet pensieve look about him. He asks for a plain, black coffee.

The barista compassionately eyed the man fo... read more