What do you call an app for an online bukkake party?

Facetime.

What's captain hook's least favorite app?

Tiktok

The reposts on this app are getting annoying.

It's annoying because I've reddit all before.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Trying dating apps for the first time while quarantined has me thinking...

I often see profiles requiring men no shorter than 6 ft tall. Judging from how close people get in grocery stores, Peter Dinklage must be at least 6'4"

What's Carol Baskin's favorite dating app?

Grindr

With this new app, you'll be able to keep track of the speed at which your pet mice move and share it online in just a matter of seconds.

Introducing: Mice Pace

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

As much as I liked that rectal fever thermometer app on the iPhone...

... on the iPad it's a fucking pain in the ass.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

On Tinder and similar apps, girls keep asking me about my height

Are we sure these girls wanna fuck or are they basketball scouts?

I got popular on the Vine app with a show called........

Whose Vine Is It Anyway?

So china is making phones without Google apps now

Guess it was always my way or the huawei

*i'm so sorry, I tried*

What dating app do chickens use?

Tender.

I got this new recipe app. I am having issues with the security.

I want my password to be BeefStew, but the app keeps telling me it’s not stroganoff.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Theres a new social network app for wifebeaters

Twatter

What’s Andy Bernard’s favorite app?

Reddit did di doo

They’re coming out with another driving service app, but it’s only for plus sized people

Fork Lyft

my friend thought of a name for a dating app for old people

I've fallen for you and I cant get up

A husband and wife are doing a crossword puzzle.

Husband: Programs for mobile devices. 4 letters

Wife: Apps

Husband: Adolescent, 4 letters

Wife: Teen

Husband: Contraction meaning failed to perform, 5 letters

Wife: Didn't

Husband: Take a life, 4 letters

Wife: Kill

Husband: Religious songs, 5 l...

What's thanos's favourite app?

Snapchat

What is a white supremacists favorite dating app?

Ancestry dot com

There is a new dating-app especially for peadophiles.

Kinder

What my jokes have in common with food bought from apps?

They're good but poorly delivered.

I was hesitant to download this app

I knew one day I might regreddit

My friend developed a video streaming app that rejects every choice you make, and plays random Russian videos instead

He calls it *Nyetflix*

I spent five dollars for a weather app on my phone....

I got two dollars and fifteen cents back in climate change.

I’d make a joke about this app...

But you’ve probably reddit before

Your Mama's SO Stupid...

She tried to start a fire using the tinder app.

(I told this joke to my friend and he suggested i post it here.)

Who has the thickest coffee?

App developers. They like their Java GUI.

How did the app control all of its users?

Karma

I used a MeetUp app and attended a BDSM meetup...

but left the meetup a little blue :(

The best dating app for lumberjacks:

Timber

I'm working on a dating app for older people.

It's called "Carbon Dating".

I just had an idea for an app that can connect people with tourettes and similar conditions, so they can have conversations together about their experiences, it's called:

Tic Talk

(I feel comfortable making this joke. I have a tic disorder)

They launched a ride share app for witches...

It's called BroomService

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is a scheduling app for gays called?

Remndr

You know Tinder right? Well have you heard of the new app for people trying to find trees?

It's called Timber.

This mindfulness app is taking a long time to download

It’s really stressing me out...I should really meditate or something.

Just got an app that tells me which one of my relatives are racist

It's called Facebook

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Those be calm and listen to rain apps are terrible....

I just put the Amazon rainforest on and I thought the fucking house was on fire.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man with a lisp went on a blind date to a heavy metal concert

Paul had been ridiculed all his life for having a lisp. As a kid, he was bullied in school. As an adult, he caught coworkers making fun of him when they thought he couldn't hear. He would even notice cashiers trying to stifle their laughter. No woman would ever go out with him, and he felt resigned ...

How many Millennials does it take to change a light bulb?

There's no app for that.

I just installed a new app on my phone that lets me know which of my friends are racist.

It's called 'Facebook'

What is a bungee jumper's least favourite app?

 

 


Discord.

 

I've just invented a dating app for chickens, its not my regular job..

Its to make hens meet

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An usual conversation on Tinder

M: Wow, you’re beautiful, so, can you send me a pic of your tiddies?

W: Sure, send me 20$

Sending money.

M: Oh, they’re gorgeous! Now, can you also send me a pic of your butt?

W: No problems, send another 50$

After a while.

M: Damn, awesome. You wouldn’t mi...

There's a new dating app out there for pirates.

It's called Shiver Me Tindrs.

If Rolex had an app on PC what would be Its file name?

Rol.exe



Sorry for the trash pun, thought about it while walking in front of rolex

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Tried out a horror themed Grindr app the other night...

It gave me the willies.

I'm thinking about starting a dating app for low IQ people.

I'm calling it OK Stupid.

Corona User Acquisition Graph

If only my app could acquire users as fast as corona I would really be killing it.

Here is an app idea: Tinder but with...

people that want to be in a relationship

I'm developing an app that lets you customize the look and feel of 4chan when browsing.

It's called 4skin

What app do you get, when you download instagram a thousand times?

Instakilo

What do you call a dating app for Catholic priests?

Answer: Kinder

Why did the Dalai Lama download the gambling app?

He'd heard they had an introductory offer that would make it Free Tibet.

After recently getting into dating apps I came to the conclusion that Tinder is a lot like Little Caesars...

if you want it hot and ready, you're gonna have to take a hit on quality

I'm going to start an app for Gastroenterologists

And call it snapshat

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Apple breast implants

Apple is working on smart breast implants, which can adapt their shape and texture to suit your lifestyle. The iTit can be used charge your mobile devices while browsing, as cupholders, and even as a self defence device. Future app updates will include anti jiggle functions, as well as an automated ...

Instagram is the best app

For posting things that went viral on reddit a week ago

I'm making an app like Tinder, but exclusively for paleontologists

I'm calling it "Carbon Dating"

Have you heard about that new app, “Cinder?”

It’s great for carbon dating!


:-)

(I just thought of this joke while walking to my car. I wouldn’t be surprised if I’m not the first to come up with it. Apologies, if it’s been made before.)

(In case it isn’t obvious, it’s a play on the *dating* app, “Tinder.”)

My friend showed me this awesome app where you can watch exotic creatures

Apparently it is called Tik tok

I created an dating app for marionettes and it failed!

They were all looking for No Strings Attached.

The Good News: I landed a job at Dreamworks thanks to the Bumblr app's networking feature

The Bad News: I'm working on the Bee Movie 2.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Damn girl are you the cookie clicker app?

Because you're fucking stupid and I don't understand why you exist.

This Grindr App is Trash

Had it for a week now and still can't find anyone to skate with.

Pokemon GO is a blatant ripoff of another popular app...

called Tinder, where you also swipe to find monsters in your area.

Someone should make a phone app that connects to your bank account and only lists restaurant you can afford

Could call it Welp

Downloaded a new app, forced to wear a Santa costume now for the next two months

Turns out I didn't read the Santa clause.

What do cell phones order at dinner?

Apps.

Friend: Bro, you have over 300 apps on your phone wtf?!?!?

Me: Yeah i have an appidemic...

What do you call it when you use an app to pay your landscaper?

Ven-mowing

They have launched a new marijuana app up here in Canada, but it is very annoying.

It keeps sending you kush notifications.

I finally found an app for my senior love life!!

It's called Carbon Dating <3

Have you heard of the new titanic app?

I was excited to use it, but as soon as I plugged it into my computer it started syncing!

- My professor. No one laughed.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

TIL That ‘App’ is short for ‘Apple’ because they were invented for the iphone

I also learned I make shit up for no reason

Decided to rename my Bank app to Onion

Every time I open it the tears come down my face

In germany after the succes of Uber and Ubereats a new app is rising under elderly folk for finding people to help in your household

They're calling it Ubermensch

After installing a personal budget control app, I saw how much money I spend on beer every month. This opened my eyes. Clearly, I shouldn't do this anymore.

I deleted the app.

What is Harry Potter’s favorite new app?

Spellcheck

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm thinking about an app to let people rate strippers

I want to name it "Strip Advisor"

Girls on dating apps get bombarded with too many lame and boring messages

For them, finding the good ones is like finding a needle in a hey-stack.

The Mom app.

I had a blind date last night. But I was concerned -- What do I do if she's really unattractive? I'll be stuck with her all night.

Turns out, There's an app for that.

It's called "Mom, Are You OK?". It schedules your phone to ring just after you meet her.

If you like her, you ig...

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