What is a spell that you can learn with a frying pan?
A wife is frying eggs for her husband in the morning
Suddenly the husband appears behind the wife's back and says:
"Careful, CAREFUL, put more fat in the pan! You're frying too many at a time. TOO MANY! Flip them! FLIP THEM! Come on! Put more fat in there. Oh dear lord. How are you gonna make space for the fat now, look, they're sticking to ...
A hungry traveler stopped at a monastery and was taken to the kitchen where a brother was frying chips...
"Are you the friar?" he asked.
The brother replied "No. I'm the chip monk."
There were 2 sausages in a frying pan.
One sausage says to the other damn it's hot in here! The other sausage says WTF a talking sausage.
Cute electronic frying pan?
[warning dad joke warning]I visited a monastery and as I walked by the kitchen I saw a man frying chips. I asked him “are you the friar?”
He replied”no I’m the chip monk”
What is it called when someone steals a large frying pan from a smaller classmate?
Taking a long wok off a short peer.
How do you keep Canadian bacon from curling in you frying pan?
Take away their little brooms.
What did the egg say to the frying pan
My roommate scratched my non stick frying pan so I had to get rid of it.
Anyone looking for an apartment?
John and Mike are 2 roomates. One day John's mother visited them for a day. While they were all eating dinner, the Mother was looking at the two boys and how they were acting. It didn't help that Mike was extremely handsome, which made the mother wondering if there was something more between t...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
“Susie asks, “Mommy, why do you always cut the ends off the sausages before you put them in the skillet?”
“Oh, that’s just the way my mother always did it. You’ll have to ask her.” “Granny”, asks Susie the next time her grandmother visits. “Why do you and mommy always cut the ends off the sausages before you put them in the skillet?” “Oh, that’s just the way my mother always did it. “You’ll have to...
What did the egg say to the frying pan?
I’m sorry I can’t get hard... I just got laid.
Why is Europe like a frying pan??
They both have Greece at the bottom!!
A man comes home after a long day, his wife then hits him in the back of the head with a frying pan
He clutches his head in pain asking her, “Honey why? Why did you do that?” She answers, “When I was doing your laundry I found a receipt in your pocket with a woman’s name on it.” He responds, “That’s why you hit me? Honey Mary-Ann is a horse I bet on, that’s the receipt for my bet.” She accepts th...
What's the difference between a hand and a frying pan?
In the frying pan, the meat shrinks. In the hand, the meat grows.
After purchasing an oval Chinese frying pan at the diminutive British aristocrat’s yard sale
Nigel realized that he’d just taken a long wok off a short Peer.
A guy is sitting reading the newspaper when his wife hits him on the back of the head with a frying pan.
"What the hell was that for?!", he screams. "I was emptying your trouser pockets and found a piece of paper with a woman's name and a phone number!" Thinking quickly, the guy says, "Honey, calm down, that's just the name of a horse i was betting on! The number is for the betting place!"....
Is that a frying pan in the pantry?
No. It’s a wok in closet.
A guy is sitting quietly reading his Sunday newspaper one day when his wife suddenly hits him over the head with a frying pan.
"What was that for?" he shouts.
His wife says, "I was just doing the laundry and I found a piece of paper in your trouser pocket with the name "Marylou on it. Who the hell is she?"
The guy says, "Oh, don't worry about that dear. Do you remember when I went to the horse racing with my f...
the blind and the moron
there was a chicken farm owned by a very cautious farmer. he was the richest man in town. one day, some man set out to find people to steal eggs for him from the farm but the only people he got were a blind man and a moron. so they planned out the heist. "every night" said the man, "the owner would ...
My wife hit me in the face with a frying pan and yelled, "That's for all the cheating!"
She has a weird way of apologising.
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I find frying pans really hot.
I guess you could say I'm pansexual.
How are a frying pan and a beautiful woman similar?
You have to get them both hot before you put the meat in.