UPJOKE
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A wife is frying eggs for her husband in the morning

Suddenly the husband appears behind the wife's back and says:

"Careful, CAREFUL, put more fat in the pan! You're frying too many at a time. TOO MANY! Flip them! FLIP THEM! Come on!
Put more fat in there. Oh dear lord. How are you gonna make space for the fat now, look, they're sticking to ...

A hungry traveler stopped at a monastery and was taken to the kitchen where a brother was frying chips...

"Are you the friar?" he asked.

The brother replied "No. I'm the chip monk."

What is a spell that you can learn with a frying pan?

Cast Iron.
AI Image Generator

My bacon kept curling in the frying pan

so I took away their little brooms and rocks.

There were 2 sausages in a frying pan.

One sausage says to the other damn it's hot in here! The other sausage says WTF a talking sausage.

Why is Europe like a frying pan??

They both have Greece at the bottom!!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

“Susie asks, “Mommy, why do you always cut the ends off the sausages before you put them in the skillet?”

“Oh, that’s just the way my mother always did it. You’ll have to ask her.”
“Granny”, asks Susie the next time her grandmother visits. “Why do you and mommy always cut the ends off the sausages before you put them in the skillet?” “Oh, that’s just the way my mother always did it. “You’ll have to...

What did the egg say to the frying pan

Yolkgottabekiddingme!!

What is it called when someone steals a large frying pan from a smaller classmate?

Taking a long wok off a short peer.

What did the egg say to the frying pan?

I’m sorry I can’t get hard... I just got laid.

My roommate scratched my non stick frying pan so I had to get rid of it.

Anyone looking for an apartment?

What's the difference between a hand and a frying pan?

In the frying pan, the meat shrinks. In the hand, the meat grows.

Someone reaches the checkout counter at IKEA...

They buy:
\- one large plate
\- one small plate
\- one spoon
\- one fork
\- one knife
\- one bowl
\- one wine glass
\- one water glass
\- one frying pan
\- one spatula


The cashier goes "So you're single, huh."
They reply "Why yes I ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I find frying pans really hot.

I guess you could say I'm pansexual.

[warning dad joke warning]I visited a monastery and as I walked by the kitchen I saw a man frying chips. I asked him “are you the friar?”

He replied”no I’m the chip monk”

After purchasing an oval Chinese frying pan at the diminutive British aristocrat’s yard sale

Nigel realized that he’d just taken a long wok off a short Peer.

A man comes home after a long day, his wife then hits him in the back of the head with a frying pan

He clutches his head in pain asking her, “Honey why? Why did you do that?” She answers, “When I was doing your laundry I found a receipt in your pocket with a woman’s name on it.” He responds, “That’s why you hit me? Honey Mary-Ann is a horse I bet on, that’s the receipt for my bet.” She accepts th...

How are a frying pan and a beautiful woman similar?

You have to get them both hot before you put the meat in.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A joke to tell your friends in-person

So, like the title says, this joke only works if you're telling it to your friend in real life! Make sure it's someone you're somewhat close with, though.

So a guy walks into a three-story building. That's very important to the story, so you gotta remember it. How many stories does it have?...

Mother's Trick.

John and Mike are 2 roomates. One day John's mother visited them for a day.
While they were all eating dinner, the Mother was looking at the two boys and how they were acting. It didn't help that Mike was extremely handsome, which made the mother wondering if there was something more between t...

A guy is sitting reading the newspaper when his wife hits him on the back of the head with a frying pan.

"What the hell was that for?!", he screams.
"I was emptying your trouser pockets and found a piece of paper with a woman's name and a phone number!"
Thinking quickly, the guy says, "Honey, calm down, that's just the name of a horse i was betting on! The number is for the betting place!"....

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