What’s the difference between North Korea and the US?

North Koreans can’t tell if their leader is seriously dead. Americans can’t tell if their leader is dead serious.

I asked my North Korean friend, “what’s it like to live in North Korea?”

He responded, “can’t complain.”

Coronavirus cases in North Korea update:

8:00: 1

8:10: 0

9:23: 1

9:28: 0

0:13: 1

0:20 0

1:47: 1

1:55: 0

North Korea’s leader has been suspiciously absent, arousing concerns from his followers who all wonder...

...Is Kim Jong ill?

Why does North Korea excel at drawing straight lines?

Because they have a supreme ruler

What does the F in North Korea stand for?

Food

Obama once visited North Korea and he asked Kim Yong Un: "Do you ever have elections?" (NSFW)

Kim replied: "Yes I have elections evely molning!"

Official Coronavirus Count over time in North Korea

12.01: 1


12.02: 0


13.16: 1


13.17: 0


16.24: 1


16.25: 0


...


...


...

Greetings to North Korea

How do we get Kim Jong Un back to being normal?

Press Ctrl+Z

There are two possibilities in North Korea

Either Kim Jong ill or Kim Jong urn

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So now that Kim Jong Uns sister is going to rule North Korea

Is she the worlds first vagtator?

What do they call protesters in North Korea???

Dead

Why is North Korea worse than South Korea?

They have no Seoul .

BREAKING NEWS: The leader of North Korea, Kim Jong-un, is brain-dead following an invasive medical procedure.

Officials praise the regime for finding common grounds with the US.

A guy in North Korea is walking home after his day at work . . .

. . . and he walks past a security checkpoint. One of the guards calls to him and says to stop, but he takes off running. The guard raises his rifle, takes aim, and shoots him dead in the street. The other guard stares at him.

"What did you do that for?" he asks.

"Curfew violation," t...

How does North Korea have 0 coronacases?

They have always been on lockdown.

North Korea: Kim Jong-Un announced at a news conference that North Korea would be landing a man on the sun within 10 years.

A startled reporter shouted, “But the sun is thousands of degrees
Celsius. No one can get within 10 million miles of the sun!”

The audience was stunned at the reporter's brazen challenge and the room
fell into a long silence. But instead of having the
reporter arrested, Kim calmly re...

Visited North Korea over the summer, but had to leave one of my bags there.

On the bright side, that raised their GDP by 0.5%

North Korea has made a plan to combat COVID-19

It is executed perfectly

North Korea providing updated coronavirus case numbers every 30 minutes today -

8:00AM - 1 case
8:30AM - 0 cases
9:00AM - 1 case
9:30AM - 0 cases
10:00AM - 1 case
10:30AM - 0 cases

i am StationEd at North korea to check the status of their leaDer.

everyone HerE is so hostiLe and Pleasant.

BREAKING: Cure for corona has been discovered in North Korea

New treatment involves shooting patients in the face, and has recorded a 100% success rate in getting rid of the virus.

What's the only drink size they allow in North Korea?

A supreme liter

News headline indicates there's been a zombie outbreak in North Korea

Headline: Kim Jong, Un-Dead

The whole world should be worried that North Korea has a missile that can hit New York…

Because if it can make it there, it can make it anywhere!

North Korea is threatening to send the US a Christmas present.

I don’t think anyone has told them about our return policy.

Due to COVID-19, North Korea has shut down all of its air and railway routes across its borders with China, and is keeping all foreigners arriving in the country via China isolated for up to one month.

TIL People are trying to get into North Korea.

North Korea COVID19 update today.

8:00 am: 0
9:15 am: 1
9:16 am: 0
10:16 am: 0
11:45 am: 1
11:46 am: 0

They seem to have found the cure to deal with the corono virus! 🦠

North Korea discovered a capsule that stops Corona Virus

45 ACP capsule

North Korea has discovered the most Effective vaccine for Covid-19

They are calling it " One Bullet Vaccine "

If Donald Trump wants to destroy North Korea...

Perhaps he should move there and become their leader.

North Korea has a new war game

The North Korean state media just announced today that in the event of possible war all citizens are ordered to follow Donald Trump on Twitter, as there’s no way in hell he would risk losing 42 million followers

While in North Korea they abducted Trump, and demanded the US give them a billion dollars or else . . . .

they would give him back.

Kim Jong-Un has announced North Korea will be the first country to send people to the sun

And so Donald Trump promptly gives him a call telling him how stupid his plan is. They can't go to the sun; it's too hot!

And so Kim replies, "We'll go at night!"

And then Trump replies, "You fool! There is no sun at night!"

The leaders of Russia, North Korea and the United States fly up to the international space station...

Upon their arrival, they all marvel at the view of the earth from such magnificent heights. They begin to toss around ideas of ways they could all benefit from the ISS.

The Russian leader talks about all of the opportunities to use imaging to spy on people from outerspace. The other leaders ...

All western rock classics are banned in North Korea.

Except ”Sweet Child in a Mine”

Did anyone hear about the scandal in North Korea?

Me neither

If you want to know why R&B music is not popular in North Korea...

...it's because they have no Seoul.

How does Kim Jong Un maintain power in North Korea and combat ED?

He puts on fake erections

It turns out North Korea has been naughty on purpose.

They’re hoping Santa will bring them all lumps of coal for Christmas.

Why is everyone in North Korea illiterate?

Because there can only be one Supreme Reader.

I hear medical care in North Korea is extremely cheap.

$5 for a bullet isn't that expensive.

Why is North Korea so heartless?

because they have no seoul

ahahahah.. please laugh

How is a hydrogen ion similar to North Korea?

They have no electrons.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Kim Jong-un of North Korea has said he's going to destroy America

So Trump was livid saying "That's MY job, and I'm not going to just stand by and see an Asian snatch away another American job."

If North Korea ever made propaganda rap, it would be K-RAP

The name is self-explanatory

What’s the best meal in North Korea?

Any meal

Why is North Korea evil?

Because it's Seoul-less! ;D

Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do Usa, North Korea, and your boobs have in common?

They all deserve to be in better hands.

There was once a Musician in North Korea

One day, Kim Jong Un himself calls the musician and asks him to direct a concert for his entertainment. Not daring to say no to the Supreme Leader, he agreed.

So the man assembled the best orchestra in all of Korea to play the piece he composed for the Leader. However when it was time to perf...

North Korea just announced it will host peace talks...

Between the United States and Canada.

North Korea bans sarcasm

What a great idea.

Apparently North Korea only has 3 tv channels...

Kim Jong Un, Kim Jong Deux and Kim Jong Trois

I live in North Korea and I'm ready to tell the world what it's really like!

[Edit]: The sun shines brightly on our smiles and future as our glorious leaders bring us joy with their mighty military.

I just read North Korea sentenced Trump to death by hanging for calling Kim Jong-un 'short and fat'.

Fake Noose?

North Korea has one of the lowest literacy rates in the world...

That's why they all elect a "nationar reader"

Kim Jung Un responds to why he doesn't let people leave North Korea.

Kim Jung Un has said "The intent is to provide people with a sense of pride and accomplishment for escaping North Korea"

Why did North Korea fail its driving test?

It has no concept of rights

Did you know North Korea's military marches to the left?

They have no rights

Why isn't there any helium in North Korea?

Because helium can only be found in a free state.

An ant is lying in its deathbed in North Korea.

He calls his son and says he wanted to tell him something for a long time.

Son Ant : What is it dad?

Father Ant : I cannot say that in this god forbidden country we have to move immediately to France or Italy before i am dead.

Confused,the Son Ant made arrangements to move to Fr...

Kim Jong-Un has promised a new clear future for North Korea.

Oops! Spelt ***nuclear*** wrong.

I don't get why people say that North Korea is bad

My friend lives there, and he can't complain about anything.

I was going to tell a joke about the leader of North Korea having a furniture fetish

But the punchline was uncomfortable.

I don't know why North Korea needs a nuclear bomb...

...their weather machine seems to be working just fine

Why is North Korea's literacy rate so high?

Because they have a supreme reader

Thanks to the tireless work of an elder statesman, possibly one of the most dignified and smartest people in the process, we are starting to normalize relations with North Korea

Let’s all give Dennis Rodman a big hand.

I just heard Kim Jong-Un has been nominated as the most literate person in all of North Korea

He is the Supweme Reader

Donald Trump finally revealed his plans to defeat North Korea

He's buying it and turning it into a Trump brand business

I want to visit north Korea one day...

before everything goes south.

Did you hear about the guy that got off scot-free after being accused of selling national secrets to North Korea?

There was no crime or treason to it.

I'll be so demoralised if North Korea decides to invade South Korea...

It'd be Seoul destroying

Letter from North Korea

When my friend moved to North Korea, he knew his mail would be read by censors, so he told me: "Let's establish a code. If a letter you get from me is written in blue ink, it is true what I say. If it is written in red ink, it is false."
After a month, I got the first letter. Everything was wri...

No wonder North Korea's so evil...

It's hard to be merciful if you have no Seoul

A wife is like north korea

You never really understand whats going on with her

A Frenchman and his two sons become the dictators of North Korea.

Their names? Kim-Jong Un, Kim-Jong Deux and Kim-Jong Trois.

(I'm sorry if not original it just came to me)

Did you know that in North Korea, the soldiers always march to the left?

That's because there are no rights.

I hear they only serve ice cold beers in North Korea

Cause Warmbiers are punishable by death

Nicki Minaj, Donald Trump, hoverboards, North Korea....

Oh wait, this *is* the place to post jokes, right?

In North Korea...

[edited] everything is grand and prosperous and USA is smelly

There's only one problem with North Korea's miracle cure for AIDS and Ebola:

The directions say the medication must be taken with food.

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