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Memorial Jokes

Stone.

Sam died and left $50,000 in his will for an elaborate funeral.

As the last attenders left, Sam’s wife Rose turned to her oldest friend Sadie and said: “Well, I’m sure Sam would be pleased.”

“I’m sure you’re right,” replied Sadie, who leaned in close and lowered her voice to a whisper....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The train was quite crowded and a U. S. Marine walked...

The train was quite crowded and a U. S. Marine walked the
entire length looking for a seat.

There seemed to be one
next to a well-dressed French woman, but when he got there,
he saw it was taken by the woman's poodle.

The war-weary
Marine asked, "Ma'am, may I have tha...

A calm, respected woman walks into a Pharmacy

As she walks in, she goes right up to the pharmacist, looks him straight into his eyes and said;

"I would like to buy some cyanide,"

The pharmacist asked her:

"why in the world do you need cyanide?"

She said:

"I need it to poison my husband."

The pharmaci...

Kanye West shows up at Neil Armstrong's memorial service...

and says "Imma let you finish, but Micheal Jackson had one of the best moon walks of ALL TIME"

I wished everyone a Happy Memorial Day..

None of them responded

Memorial service

I was at my friends memorial service and after a few wonderful eulogies the minister asked would anybody else like to say something.

I was itching to say something so I rose and asked whats the wi-fi password at this place.

The shocked minister replied - Sir! Have you no shame?

...

The new backyard grill I got for Memorial Day weekend is actually assembled in America...

The box of components are imported, but I had to put it together myself in my garage.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Ted Cruz left the Navy 9/11 memorial service early...

He only had time to meet a handful of semen.

Any tips / ideas on what to do for memorial day?

I forgot what to do

How do you get Donald Trump to visit a memorial in the rain?

Tell him the forecasts predict golden showers.

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