UPJOKE
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What does Batman likes to put in his drink?

Just ice

What do you call a cat who likes to pass gas?

Puss and toots

My grandma likes to prank us by pretending to choke on her food

It’s an old gag

Asked a guy what kind of music he likes. He told me he's really into "blackgaze"

I should have asked him how it's spelled before I googled it.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

what do you call someone who likes all kinds of insects

beesexual

I want a girl who likes long romantic walks

Because I don’t have a car or any money

What do you call a large reptile who likes to stir up petty fights on social media?

An Insta-gator.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My grandpa told me he likes his men like he likes his coffee

With milk and not in his butt

My wife likes to do it doggystyle

She rolls over and plays dead while I sit up and beg.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a sailor who likes to get tied up and gagged during sex?

A submarine

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

8 years ago today, I shared the worst joke I ever created. I reposted it 4 years ago. Here it is again for those that missed it.

There are two identical twin brothers that live together. One happens to be a well-respected dentist, and the other can't seem to keep a job. Instead of actively looking for work, he likes to sit around at home. One Saturday, the dentist is hungry, and puts his brother on the spot. He tells him to g...

What do you call an economist that likes to eat?

An economnomnomist

She told me she likes it rough

So I proceeded to tell her all about my childhood.

How do you know if a sniper likes you?

He misses you

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A boy asks his mother, "Mommy, why is my cousin named Barry?"

"Well," says the mother, "your aunt Linda named her son Barry because she likes to eat berries."

"I see," says the boy. "And why is my other cousin named Stu?"

"Well", replies the mother, "you aunt Molly named her son Stu because she likes to eat stew."

"Very interesting. Why...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Barber (long)

A man was getting a haircut prior to taking a trip to Rome. He mentioned the trip to the barber, who responded,

“Why would you want to go there? It’s crowded and dirty — and full of Italians! You’re crazy to go to Rome!

“So, how are you getting there?”

“We’re taking United,” w...

I had a date with a girl with leprosy and I think she likes me

She conveniently left an ear behind

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