I don't like hippopotamuses.

I guess you could say I'm a hippo-crit.

Why don't you ever see hippopotamuses hiding in trees?

Because they're really good at it.

I know a guy who writes reviews of hippopotamuses despite the fact he always told me he was against rating animals.

He’s a hippo-crit.

What do you get when you cross a hippopotamuses, an elephant, and a rhino?

A hellifiknow

Hippopotamuses are seemingly unconcerned about the effects of climate change on their habitat

It's as if they lived in de Nile

So, a stutterer was a wedding

He stand's up and says:

-hip, hip

And then everyone on the wedding party said with their glasses raised:

-HURRAY

The stutterer, tried again, but louder

-HIP!! HIP!!

Everyone raised their glasses again and shouted out of their lungs!

-HUURRAAAAY!!!!!...

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