If a pachyderms appears at your door unexpectedly,
What military tactic are they employing?
The Elephant Of Surprise.
Hating Pachyderms
If you say you hate all pachyderms, but you're actually cool with elephants and rhinos, your really just being hippo critical
What do you call a pachyderm who sings jazz?
Ella Fantzgerald
Did you guys hear about the pachyderm who earned a Rhodes Scholarship?
He’s an Oxford llama
What do you call a pachyderm that doesn’t matter?
Irr-elephant.
I don't think much about large pachyderms
To me they are irrelephant
What do you call a pachyderm who's in last place?
Doesn't matter - it's rear elephant
What do you call a pachyderm who can't contribute anything meaningful to the conversation?
**Irrelephant.**
How do you track the reproductive cycle of pachyderms?
With the Periodic Table of Elephants.
Why wouldn't you ever see a pachyderm on a civil warship?
Because an elephant never frigates.
aaahhhthankyou
What's the difference between a suitcase and an elephant?
You can pack a suitcase, but you can't pachyderm
A zookeeper is giving a chemist a tour of the zoo.
The zookeeper gestures at a fancy new building proudly and says to the scientist "This is our replacement 'Pachyderm Palace'. It's newly built, and is not fully accessible, so it's only in use on Tuesdays."
The chemist says "Ah, so it's a periodic stable for the elephants."
So, a friend of mine claims to be really body-positive, but...
...I saw him comment on a picture of a fat woman in Wal-Mart comparing her to a pachyderm. I told him to stop being so hippo-critical.
What do you give an elephant who wants to quit smoking?
Pachyderm CQ
1 joke is hidden here because they may not be suitable for all ages.
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