Why don’t frogs give out parking tickets?

Because they already toad ya!

A lawyer, a priest, and a programmer are driving down a mountain when their brakes give out...

They all start screaming as the car goes faster and faster, and they start barreling around the curves. Somehow they make it to the bottom, safe and sound. They all pile out of the car as quickly as they can.

The lawyer angrily says "We should sue the manufacturer!"

The priest falls to...

Why did the hotel refuse to give out the advertised “continental breakfast?”

The continent was Africa.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do women's prisons give out tampons on release day?

Because all sentences should end with a period.

what is something you can give out as a Christmas gift but still able to keep it at the same time?

flu

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you know they give out Viagra at nursing homes?

It stops the patients rolling out of bed.

What did the Mongolians give out for Halloween?

Khandy

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What bees give out milk?

BooBees

There are two rules in life:

1. Never give out all the information.

Given the current state of affairs, Santa needed something new to give to naughty children this year.

Which is why he has decided to give out coalvid

Ways To Get Rid Of Telemarketers

An old one, but a good one…

1. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for Bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.

2. If they start out with, “How are you today?” say, “Why do you want to know?” Or you can say, “I'm so glad you asked, because no one seems to care...

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