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What is the funniest time of day?

7:07 because when you flip it upside down, it says LOL!

This joke was invented by my 8 year old daughter so be nice please :)

World's Funniest Joke

The "world's funniest joke" is a term used by Richard Wiseman of the University of Hertfordshire in 2002 to summarize one of the results of his research. For his experiment, named LaughLab, he created a website where people could rate and submit jokes. Purposes of the research included discovering t...

The funniest joke...

After a lengthy trial, Bob is found guilty and sentenced to life in a medium security prison. Arriving just in time for the daily lunch, Bob introduces himself to his fellow inmates as he waits in line for the meal.

Somebody yells out "54!", and everyone around Bob starts laughing.

"12...

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A redditor is searching for the funniest joke of all time, so he subscribes to r/jokes.

After a short while, and a few small chuckles, he realises he's reading the same shit over and over again, post after post.

"I'm never going to find a real joke", he thinks.

He sighs and tilts his head in dismay. Looking down he starts to read the thread and it hits him...

Funniest joke of all time...according to Wikipedia...thought I share.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he'...

What is the funniest candy of all?

A LOL-lipop.

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One of the funniest vampire jokes

3 vampires are having a competition to prove who's the most vicious vampire amongst them.

The strongest one started 1st,

"watch this," He said as he flies so fast, about 100 miles/hour.
After only 10 minutes, he comes back with blood all over his mouth.
"what happened?" they aske...

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Adam Sandler told the funniest joke I've ever heard. It's about Shaq.

So Sandler relays the story below:

I was playing basketball and got the opportunity to play with Shaq. It was great. Afterward it just so happens that I'm in the showers and it's just him and me in adjoining showers. So I think to myself, I've got to see his penis. This is my one chance. I've...

What is the best or funniest insult you have ever heard or said to someone?

A buddy told a horse-faced girl at the bar after she wouldn't stop trying to pick him up: "you look like you want to nuzzle a sugarcube out of my hand"

My parents are the funniest people in the world

They made a joke 21 years ago and people are still laughing at it.

Germanys funniest joke according to research

A man comes to the fortune teller and sits in front of the crystal ball. "I see you have two children," says the fortune teller.

"YOU believe that!" He replies. "I am a father of three."

The fortune teller smiles and answers: "YOU believe that!"

Eight year old tells funniest joke

My eight year old cousin told me this one:

Why was Beethoven mad at his chicken?

Because he kept saying Bach Bach Bach

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Funniest short joke

A three year old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath.
"Mum," he asked. "Are these my brains?"
"Not yet!" she replied.

A joke I made up as a child that I was very proud of and thought was the funniest thing in the world:

Q. What do you call a famous pebble?

A. A rock star.

I just read the funniest joke on Reddit...

For the thousandth time.

The funniest jokes...

...are those that builds expectations for what's going to happen, but completely breaks them in the end by saying something completely hippopotamus.

Why are squids the funniest animals?

...because of their ten-tickles

What's the funniest thing a narcissist knows?

Mememes

Funniest thing my gf has ever said

We were at a a red light and i noticed a woman in the car behind me making a lot of arm and hand motions. No one was in the car with her (probably on bluetooth).

Me: Hey babe look at this woman behind us. What is she doing? She's just flailing her arms around but there isn't any one with her...

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What is the funniest military-based joke you know?

I will go first ...
A beautiful lady was speaking to a General at a party:
Lady: When was the last time you had sex?
General: 1945.
Lady: Oh my God! How about some now ?
General: [Looks at his watch] No, I'm cool. It's only 2030.

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What’s the funniest part of a 90 year old woman’s body?

Her boobs! They are real knee slappers

Who was the funniest pope in history?

**Pope Hilarius** (or **Hilary**) was the bishop of Rome from 19 November 461 to his death on 29 February 468.

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Contest! The Three Funniest Jew Jokes get a free Christmas hat [US & Canada Only]

We're jews over at Rally Flip Cap and we think Jewish jokes are hilarious. We also think ironic prizes are hilarious. So to celebrate Hanukkah we're going to giveaway 3 Merry Christmas hats!

The 3 most upvoted jokes get this hat for free, completely free, including the shipping, no hidden fe...

Three writers, Al, Ben, and Carl, who were attending a writing convention, booked a 3 bedroom suite on the 75th floor of a hotel.

When they arrived back at the hotel from the convention, the receptionist told them, "I'm terribly sorry, but all the elevators are broken. In the meantime, you will have to take the stairs."

Now, Al was a writer of funny stories, Ben was a writer of scary stories, and Carl was a writer of sa...

What is the funniest fish?

A piranha-ha-ha.

In fact, it hurt itself laughing so hard, it had to see a sturgeon.

I googled the world's funniest joke

Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson went camping. They pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night, Holmes woke Watson up and said, "Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see".
Watson said: "I see millions and millions of stars",
Holmes asked...

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What dog breed is the funniest?

Pit bulls, they leave everyone in stitches.



Disclaimer: I am a pit owner, and I still found this funny. Please don’t inundate me with pro-pitty rebuttals, I already know.

Most Intelligent But Funniest

An engineer, a physicist and a mathematicians have to build a fence around a flock of sheep, using as little material as possible. The engineer forms the flock into a circular shape and constructs a fence around it. The physicist builds a fence with an infinite diameter and pulls it together until i...

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A national newspaper recently participated in a contest to discover the funniest pun

The paper collected ten different submissions from their staff and submitted all to the contest certain at least a single entry might be good enough to win.



Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

Wanna hear the funniest joke?

It's quarantine.


Don't get it? Oh well, it's an inside joke..

Two engineers meet each other on their way into work ]

One of them has a new bike, and the other one asks where he got it. "Well," the first one says, "it's the funniest story. A beautiful woman rode up to me, threw down the bike, ripped off her clothes, and said 'Take what you want.'" "Good choice," said the other engineer, "the clothes probably wouldn...

This was once voted the UK's funniest joke...

A woman and her baby gets on a bus. The driver stops her at the door and says:"you have the ugliest baby I've ever seen!".the woman storms to the back of the bus, fuming. She sits down next to a stranger and says:"that bus driver just insulted me" The stranger then says:" That is absolutely not on!...

I've written the funniest joke about Neuclear Fusion.

I'll post it in 20 years.

What is the Funniest soviet joke?

What is the Funniest soviet joke?



An old man was scattered on the sidewalk and accidentally fell into the river beside the road, shouting for help! The two policemen heard it, turned a blind eye, and continued to talk and laugh as they walked. The old man became anxious and shouted "D...

What’s the funniest meat?

Beef Jokey.

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If r/Jokes posts were like YouTube videos

Joke title: IS THIS THE WORLD'S FUNNIEST JOKE?

Hello welcome to my joke, this joke is sponsored by BackdooredVPN, get the VPN service for just $29.95 a month. Also sponsored by Microtransaction Legends, download the app for free today.

Before we share the joke we want to remind you tha...

\r\jokes has the funniest most original content

But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

The funniest joke I've seen on reddit

"Subreddit Info:

The Conspiracy subreddit is a thinking ground."

credit to r/conspiracy

What's the funniest landscape?

Hill areas.

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The depressed clown, Pagliacci, visits a therapist incognito.

He spends the hour talking about his depression. Nothing seems worth it anymore. He can’t smile at all. He has no wife or girlfriend to share his life with. Children’s smiles don’t make him happy anymore. His loving little dog doesn’t make him happy. He is at the end of his rope.

Therapist: “...

Favorite and funniest oxymoron

Government intelligence

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It's funniest if you look up the verses yourself

A pastor has just moved to a new town, and the day before services, he goes around visiting members of his new congregation. He comes to one house and knocks... no answer. He rings the doorbell... no answer... but he can tell someone is home, so he pulls out a card and writes on the back, *Revelatio...

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The funniest thing my grandpa ever said

I was visiting my grandparents a couple years back and my grandma brought up that the PA at the local clinic, an attractive 30-something year-old woman, was moving out of town. My grandpa piped up with "Yeah, I'm gonna miss her. Do you know how hard it is for a man my age to get a 33 year old woma...

This woman goes into a funeral home to make arrangements for her husband's funeral.

She tells the director that she wants her husband to be buried in a dark blue suit.

He asks, "Wouldn't it just be easier to bury him
in the black suit that he's wearing?"

But she insists that it must be a blue suit and
gives him a blank check to buy one.

When she comes ...

Whos the funniest disney princess?

raPUNzel

*sits there laughing to self*

...so lonely..

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Funniest Joke of All Time (dirty)

A good friend shared this with me and I'll try my best to do it justice in writing: If oral sex makes your day, what does anal sex do?

It makes your hole weak (whole week)

We now have a standing joke that when we really like something, we say it makes our hole weak. Lol

What’s the funniest joke you’ve read on Reddit.

I'll go first:
Once on a plane full of Redditors, one guy suddenly starts choking and the air hostess asks if there was a doctor on-board.

Immediately, three people stand up and go, "I'm not a doctor but ..."

Funniest Medical Joke

Doctor to Nurse: Please give me anesthesia?
New Joiner Nurse: But sir only one injection was available here.
Doctor: We also need only one.
Nurse: Sir I already have been give you.
Doctor: When?
Nurse: When you said
Doctor: I am feeling sleepiness.
Nurse: Sir i thi...

What is the funniest French condiment

Le mayo

Which nature phenomenon is the funniest?

A Cyclown.

What's the funniest crime?

Man's laughter.

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You know who's the funniest comedian?

My dick as all the women that saw it immediately laughed

What’s the funniest infection?

Athlete’s foot. It causes the feet to crack up.

10 most funniest jokes ever.

So far have we gone, stressing up ourselves today. Let me remind you something, ALL WORK AND NO PLAY MAKES JACK A DULL BOY. What this popular saying meant is that we shouldn't spend all our time on work. At least, making out 20 percent of your total time should be enough fun.

Today, I have m...

I'm looking for the funniest short joke ever

Not short as in small, short as in short

Which confectionary company is the funniest?

The one that produces *Snickers*

Do you know whats the funniest german Joke?

me neither

I thought this was the funniest joke in elementary school

There are three kids named Shutup, Trouble, and Manners. Trouble goes missing, so Shutup and Manners go to the police station. Manners goes to the bathroom so Shutup goes to a police officer. The police officer says,

“What’s your name son.”

“Shutup”

“What!?”

“Shutup”
<...

One of the funniest jokes I've ever seen

I really hate those people who knock on your door and say that you must be 'saved' or you'll 'burn'.





Stupid firemen.

funniest joke you'll hear today about congestive heart failure

Assuming you are healthy, your heart when working normally, acts, sort of like a pump, or rather, two pumps. You see, your right heart expands to draw deoxygenated blood in from the body, and contracts to pump it out to the lungs to become oxygenated. And at the same time, your left heart draws in o...

Which is the funniest Disney movie?

Ra-pun-zel

What is the funniest food?

The Artijoke

How does the funniest joke in the world end?

With laughter.

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Funniest joke I’ve heard all week

I’m in a stock market group on Kik and one of the guys was talking about how he has over 200 holdings in his portfolio and another guy was like “Damn Frank so diverse LGBTQ made him their mascot.” And I couldn’t stop laughing for a good five minutes. I know it’s pretty corny and low effort but I jus...

Who’s the funniest dictator?

LMAO Zedong

I keep telling my kids that limousine jokes are the funniest kind.

They think it’s bit of a stretch though

Still my funniest joke

A man is hosting a radio program and he wants to call a random person to ask for their favourite song in order to play it on the radio. So the random guy says " well I just want to say that I found a person's wallet on the street" and the host tells him " well do you want to share the owner's name s...

Who’s the funniest man alive?

Joe K.

I have the funniest joke for you guys.

American 'healthcare' system.

100% True Story - Funniest Thing That Ever Happened to Me

Not long after my younger son was born I left the Army and, not having a new job to go to and my wife having a great job, I looked after the house and my two boys for some years.

When my older son started school, we would walk home together and discuss what he'd learned and talk about life. ...

What's the funniest motorcycle?

A Yama-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.... :)

^^^I'll ^^^show ^^^myself ^^^out...

What is the funniest part of the body?

The heel areas!

Why is Punisher the funniest Marvel character?

Because he has the best punchlines.

Who is the funniest communist leader?

Chairman ROFLMAO

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