A British man was talking to his friend about his views on Brexit...

"These bloody immigrants come over here. They're up to no good, right? I hate these bloody immigrants. They need to go back to where they came from."


His friend replies with "But why do you hate them so much?"


The British man replies, "I'll tell you why I hate them, I'll te...

I know this is unpopular to say in this inclusive culture but there are some races I don't like

Especially the 800 m dash

In German culture they tend to save the best food for last...

...its known as “furstwurst”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A clearly inebriated woman, stark naked, jumped into a taxi in New York and laid down on the back seat.

The cab driver, an old Jewish gentleman, opened his eyes wide and stared at the woman.

He made no attempt to start the cab.

The woman glared back at him and said, “What’s wrong with you, honey? Haven’t you ever seen a naked woman before?”

The old Jewish driver answered, “Let me ...

What do an Archaeologist and Cancel Culture have in common?

They both love to dig up the past

Someone asked me who my favorite vampire is in pop culture...

I said, "The one from Sesame Street."

They said, "He doesn't count!"

"I assure you," I said, "He does."

I want to know if this brazillian joke makes sense in other cultures

A woman went out and did not return home. On the next day she told her husband that she had slept at her friend's house. Not believing her, the husband called 10 of her best friends and none of them knew what he was talking about.

A man went out and did not return home. On the next day, he to...

Over a thousand years ago, there was a culture in Southeast Asia that worshipped parrots.

They were pollytheistic.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Women who study abroad are considered "cultured" and "internationally minded"

I study a broad and suddenly I'm a "sex offender".

That pro-crime culture is getting ridiculous!

My little brother's teacher asked "Who shot Abraham Lincoln?". He answered "John Wilkes Booth", and the next recess, his locker had "STOP SNITCHING" painted on it.

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A Greek and an Italian were sitting in a coffee shop one afternoon discussing who had the superior culture.

The Greek says, "Well, we have the Parthenon."

Arching his eyebrows, the Italian replies, "We have the Coliseum."

The Greek retorts, "We Greeks gave birth to philosophy.

The Italian, nodding agreement, says, "But we built the Roman Empire."

And so on and so on until the G...

How do you tell the difference between yogurt and Australia?

If you leave yogurt in the sun for 250 years, it’ll develop culture.

Did you know that cultures with arranged marriages typically serve melon at the wedding feast?

Yep. It symbolizes the fact that they cantelope.

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An American anthropologist is studying cultures throughout Western Africa.

He discovers an isolated civilization in the West African Jungle. It’s a small village with wooden houses and plenty of domesticated animals. The anthropologist is impressed by the organization of the village and becomes eager to learn more about the culture of it’s inhabitants.

He approa...

Canada could have had it all: American industry, British Culture, and French Cuisine.

Instead, they got: French Industry, American culture, and British cuisine

I grew up listening to music that demeaned women, glorified violence and normalized criminal behavior. I know it definitely influenced the culture around me.

Thankfully, I stopped listening to country music and found hip hop.

2019: Cancel culture has gone too far

2020: Hold my Corona

You know how Santa Claus is different in each culture?

In pirate culture he’s called shanty claus

Today's litigious culture is ridiculous. I was injured in a slip/trip/fall from a cardboard box.

I sued the box and won £5000 in corrugations.

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So there is this guy named Jack...

There’s a guy named Jack. He has a girlfriend named Wendy. Jack is hopelessly in love with Wendy, and decides to ask her to marry him. To prove how much he loves her, he goes and gets “Wendy” tattooed on his penis, as a gesture of loyalty. When he’s erect, his penis shows her name, and when it’s li...

I went to Hawaii with my dad to get a taste of their traditional culture. They set out two bowls of their famous delicacy. When I couldnt choose which one to grab, my dad said,

"Pick your poi, son"

A man decides to visit Germany with his dog for 2 weeks.

He wishes to experience German culture during the winter. So, he visits an ice rink. As soon as the man steps foot on the ice, the dog darts forward, excited about his new surroundings. The dog proceeds to fall through a thinner patch of ice. The man leaps forward to save his dog, but another man di...

How do you spot a cultured Redditor?

They grow blue cheese.

I heard they want to subvert the culture of the mining industry by phasing out the word 'mine'

They want to call it an ore well.

Respect all religion and culture

They gave you holiday

In all of the possible universes where Spider-Man is of another culture or race, why can’t he be Australian?

Because if he got bitten by a spider in Australia he’d just die.

If anyone says you have to work 365 days in 2020 in order to succeed, they don’t have your best interests in mind and is preaching toxic hustle culture

You need to work 366 days cause it’s a leap year

The most admirable quality of Greek and Roman culture:

their ability to give terms to scientific phenomenon centuries before they were discovered.

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Gay man had culture

The stool test confirmed.

I’m taking a horticulture class . . .

so your mom can learn about culture.

A Taiwanese joke translated and adapted to suit global culture.

I failed my geography test because of one single question.

The question was: "Where's the capital of Ukraine?"

I responded with "Kyiv" when the answer was "Moscow".

I argued that the teacher doesn't know anything about geography while the teacher said I know nothing about commu...

A Samoan man gave me a detailed history and explanation of his heritage, culture, and the country in which he was raised

Those specific islanders!

There was a man who believed that he could cook the best meal ever existed in the history of kitchen culture, and he wanted to show his dish to the most talented an known chefs from all around the world

He invited all the top chefs of the world that he could reach to and organized a nice evening where he would cook and serve his special course. After the chefs came, he went to the kitchen and began cooking. Even though the chefs insisted, he didn't let anyone in and mysteriously prepared his dish.<...

Ezra, a devout Jew, sent his son to Israel to learn about the culture.

When Ezra's son came back, he told his father, "I had a great time in Israel. I even converted to Christianity!"

Ezra was so shocked that he decided to tell his next door neighbour, Levi, also a devout Jew.

"Funny you should mention this," said Levi. "I too sent my son to Israel and he...

Hawaii is a veritable island paradise for someone studying Spock's culture

It's a Vulcanology hot spot

(I land chains of jokes like this one, occasionally)

My friends say I'm cheesy...

at least I'm cultured.

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Why would Hitler have had a Twitter account if it was around back then?

He cancelled cultures.

TIL that in some cultures, you are not a man until your father calls you one

TIAL that I am a 38-year-old boy.

My friend is pretty sick and tired of PC culture

I tried to console him but he didn't want his hand held

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There are several distinct cultural differences between Australian and America. For example, Americans are really offended by the word cunt...

Conversely, Australians are really offended by schools being shot up.

For centuries the catholic church censored everything that wouldn‘t fit with their teachings.

You know what I call that?

Chancel culture!

An American, a Brasilian and an Argentinian go take a test together

In it, they all have to get in a plane, take off, go to random location, and just by putting their hand out of the window mid flight, they have to guess if they are in their countries or not and why.

First goes the american, who says:
- We are in the USA, i can feel the freedom of democrac...

A woman is deciding between three suitors which one to be with. She says to the three men, "we are still young and inexperienced, go out there and travel around the world, we'll see when you come back."

So the first guy goes to Europe and tours the different countries there.

The second guy goes to Europe, then Asia, then Africa, then Australia and basically goes everywhere.

The third guy doesn't go anywhere.

6 months later they all meet up and the first guy says, "I went to all...

My dad wanted to learn more about Korean culture.

K, pop.

Son: Dad, what's the opposite of Karen?

Dad: Umm, I don't know, Sharon...?

Son: But I thought Sharon was Karen.




Edit: Thank you u/Ri0tp0p0 and u/CulturedCroissant for the awards! :)

It just occurred to me why the Grim Reaper is so popular in myths and cultures throughout the world

People are always dying to meet him

An archaeologist was in Jerusalem when he discovered a slab of rock with five figures on it: the Star of David, an ox, a shovel, an owl, and a woman.

"This is really fascinating," said the archaeologist. "This tells me a lot about ancient Hebrew culture. The Star of David tells me, of course, that they were a very religious people. The ox tells me that they used domesticated animals, such as oxen, to plow the fields. The shovel tells me that they...

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An American visiting Spain visited a local restaurant on Sunday. He asked the waiter about the the "Daily Special Cojones".

An American visiting Spain visited a local restaurant on Sunday. He asked the waiter about the the "Daily Special Cojones".

The waiter says, "Señor, every Sunday during bullfight season, we sell Cojones in honor of the bull fights. So yes, today we are selling bull testicles. We know the spor...

C.S.Lewis once wrote an anthology on anime culture...

...The Chronicles of Nani-a.

Inspired by “Vulture Culture”: two vultures are boarding a plane, one of them is dragging a dead chicken. The gate attendant stops them and says:

I’m sorry sir, but this airline does not allow carrion.

Went to America and really fell into the culture.

A guy in the local gas station told me to "Have a nice day."


I didn't, so I sued him.

I hate the PC culture we live in these days.

Can't a guy just use a Playstation without getting called a "peasant"?

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Comparing cultures

A Greek and an Irishman were sitting in a Starbucks one day comparing their two cultures.
Over a double latte, the Greek mentions “We built the Pantheon, you may recall, along with the Temple of Apollo.”
“Well, it was the Irish that discovered the Summer and Winter Solstices.”
“But it was t...

In order to stop accusations of racism, Trump decides to hire a Mexican immigrant

However, he doesn't feel confortable having him as an employee and calls him over in his office.

Juan: "Why you call me, jefe ?"

Trump: "You're fired!"


Juan: "Que ?! Why ?!!"


Trump: "Because....uh... Because you didn't finish high school!"

Juan: "Oh, no pro...

Some bloke just told me I have no culture

Just because I can name more ninja turtles than renaissance artists.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It's not surprising that the Japanese have adopted so much of American culture.

The first American product they tested blew everyone away.

A Jewish businessman in Chicago sent his son to Israel for a year to absorb the culture.

When the son returned, he said,

"Papa, I had a great time in Israel! ...by the way, I converted to Christianity."

"Oy vey," thought the father. "What have I done?"

He took his problem to his best friend. "Aron," he said, "I sent my son to Israel, and he came home a Christian. W...

Running culture has gotten weird

Back in my day we wore running shoes and shorts and just tried our best, but I showed up to a 3K and all the people were in hoods and robes and they were all super unpleasant.

Some people are sceptical of migrants because they think they don't embrace their new country's culture

But I teach calculus to international students at my local university, and they all integrate really well.

I am a builder from Sioux Falls, and I was recently in Madrid at a local tavern, and couldn’t believe the amount of code violations in their building practices. This led me to accept that they are their own culture and....

Nobody inspects the Spanish inn condition.

What do you call a scientist who works with bacteria?

A man of culture.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It's interesting how mythology has permeated our culture. Just look at Oedipus...

he's the most famous motherfucker around.

A white man visits a rural tribe in Africa

A white man wants to take the trip of a lifetime, and decides on a trip to Africa. He is in a go nowhere job, with no friends or family, and is feeling down. He quits his job and decides to travel to a remote area, far from civilization. He does not like the touristy vibe that some places give off, ...

I hate people who pretend they're cultured when they talk about Mozart.

I bet they haven't seen any of his paintings.

My book on Nordic cultures is taking a long time to write

I don’t think I’ll ever make it to the Finnish.

Have you heard about North African culture?

It's Amazigh.

What do you call the collective of all movies, songs, and stories about dogs?

Pup culture

A Mexican man visits his cousin in the US

He wants to watch a baseball game; an integral part of American culture, he has heard. Unable to purchase a ticket, he scales the stadium facade and watches while clinging to the roof.

Afterwards, his cousin enquires about his experience.

“It was great!” He says. “Americans are so co...

An Italian and A Greek debate culture.

An Italian and a Greek are debating the intellectual and cultural values of their respective countries. The Greek scoffs, "You Italians learned everything you know from us Greeks. For instance, we came up with the Classical Pantheon." The Italian replies, "Yes, but we improved upon everything you di...

50 Cent is a very insightful person. Wherever he goes, he tailors his shows to be inoffensive to local cultures and customs.

At his latest gig in Harare he performed under the name "4 Billion Dollars".

A Rabbi Wants to Spread Judaism with the World

A rabbi wants to spread Judaism with the world but isn’t sure where he would like to start. He decides he will spin a globe and randomly place his finger to stop it. He does this and lands in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. The rabbi goes on a boat, and sails to the spot he chose. As it turns out, ...

What do you call a cult that's been around for 1000s of years?

Culture

Americans may be ignorant of other cultures...

But at least we invented the hamburger

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A researcher was conducting a study on the effects of gore across various cultures

He selected an American, a European, and a Japanese man. To see the reactions of these people, he used a picture of a man with his toes freshly amputated.

The American man seemed a bit squeamish when presented with the picture, but otherwise he was okay.

The European man wrinkled his f...

I cooked something so good a culture was built upon it.

However according to the EPA it was a biohazard.

What would a book on BDSM culture written in alabama be called?

Fifty Shades of Hay.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[NSFW] A American businessman takes a trip to Japan

An American businessman travels to Japan for a very important business meeting that will make or break his career. He realizes that sealing the deal for their business will not happen in the board room and so he agrees to join them afterwards for a night out on the town.

After a night of dri...

A Russian joke

An American, a Serbian, a Russian and a Greek are stuck in a falling airplane. There are only three parachutes there.

The American says “I am from the most important country. Let me jump, I am important.” The Serbian gives him a parachute and the American jumps.

Then the Greek says “I ...

An English test question asked us to use the word "horticulture" in a sentence.

I wrote, "You can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think."

What is the difference between USA and yoghurt?

One can exist for 200 years without developing culture.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Penises are an important part of human culture and anatomy and must be honoured

I suggest we erect a statue

Two melons are in love...

After decades of conflict and war, the people of Watermelon Kingdom and Cataloupe Country are trying to ease diplomatic tensions between their peoples. A student exchange program is started to foster cross-cultural understanding.

Through the exchange program, Wally Watermelon meets Cassandra...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In some cultures people call their dogs 汪 or ワン, like 'woof' in English because this is the sound they make

Wonder if my dog ever calls me 'Jesus fucking Christ'

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