This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Curious child

There was family reunion one day and the mom and dad were preparing for it.

The kid went to the kitchen where his mom was cutting the turkey.

She accidentally cuts her finger and screamed "Fuck!"

Kid: what does "fuck" mean?

Mom: o-oh it means "cut" hah ha...

so ...

"What happened to the wooden car with wooden wheels and wooden engine?" asked the curious boy.

His mother took a deep breath and then replied, "It wooden go."

A young Mexican man named Jose was curious about America so he snuck across the border

He wanted to go see a baseball game so when he went home, he could tell his family all about it. When he got there, the game was sold out, so he decided to climb to the top of a flag pole to get a better look. When he returned home, his family was anxious to hear about his experience:

"What h...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A pirate meets a stranger one day, and is very curious about the pirate's injuries.

The stranger looks down at the pirate's legs, and asks, "Say, why do you have a wooden leg?"

The pirate replies, "Ya see, we we're fightin' some other ship down yonder and a canonball from the enemies struck my leg and wiped it clean off!"

The stranger was interested, and noticed the p...

An American tourist is traveling in Thailand and stops over in a small border village for a meal. While the inside of the restaurant is rather small and modest, it does have a beautifully designed ant farm covering most of one wall. Curious, he asks the old man running the restaurant about it.

“Ah,” says the old man. “I use the ant eggs to make a dish called maengman chom. The Cambodians who visit here especially love it; they spend so many riel on it that I had that display made to show off the ants. It’s a specialty of mine; would you like to try some?”

“Ant eggs are a little exo...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman was cheating on her husband. Her son is curious what her mom and that stranger are doing so he hides in the wardrobe.

Suddenly the husband comes home. She doesn't know her son is already hiding in the wardrobe when she sends her lover in there.

Son: "Dark in here, huh?"

Lover: "Ye"

Son: "I got a baseball bat"

Lover: "So?"

Son: "You're going to buy it for 250$ or I'm going to blow...

I have always had eye glasses. I was curious to see what I would look like with them off. So I took them off and looked in the mirror.

As it turns out, I can't see myself without them.

Why are singers so curious?

Because they are in-choir-ing.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I saw the Curious Case of Benjamin Button again last night....

Never gets old :/

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

New nurse at an elderly care centre: "Hey, I was checking though Bills medication list and got curious, why would a 90 year old man need viagra while staying here alone?"

Nurse 2: "It stops him rolling out of bed."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A curious lad goes up to his dad after school and asks him “Dad? What’s a cunt?”

His dad scolded him for using such foul language but appreciated the intrigue and curiosity of the kid.

“I’ll show you what it is if you promise to never say that word again”.

The child agreed and the Dad led him by the hand into the room where his mother was asleep. He carefully pull...

A curious little girl

A girl realized that she had grown hair between her legs. She got worried and asked her mom about that hair. Her mom calmly said: "That part where the hair has grown is called Monkey, be proud that your monkey has grown hair." the girl smiled. At dinner, she told her sister: "My monkey has grown ha...

A very curious customer asked a local tomato farmer if their tomatoes are genetically modified.

"No." Said the farmer "No." Said the tomato

What's an absolutely fail-proof way to make a Redditor curious?

[removed]

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Click to find out what kind of motherfucker you are



You a curious motherfucker.

My buddy performs circumcisions, and i was curious how much he got paid

"Oh we dont get paid, we just keep the tips"

A curious son notices a change in the U.S flag’s position and decides to ask his mom

Son: Mom, why is the flag at the top of the pole today?

Mom: Because there hasn’t been a mass shooting all week Billy.

A Texan meets a Havard grad. Curious, he asks:

Texan: “Where are you from?”

Harvard grad: “I come from a place where we do not end our sentences with prepositions.”

Texan: “Okay – where are you from, jackass?”

A dwarf was kicked out of a nudist colony for being too curious.

Apparently he was putting his nose in everyone's business.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Billy was a curious kid (NSFW)

Well billys parents were fighting one day. As the parents are fighting the dad calls the mom a Bitch and the mom calls the dad a Bastard.

Billy wants to know what Bitch and Bastard means so he asks his parents. They tell him it means ladies and gentleman.

Later that night the parents ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A boy is curious about the male visits his mother gets...

...so he hides in the closet of her bedroom to find out what is going on. He sees his mother having sex with a man. Suddenly they hear his father coming home, and the man hides in the closet in which the son is already in.

The son says "Pretty dark in here". The man asks him "What are you doi...

Do you know how to make a dumb person curious?

“No, how?”
-
“I’ll tell you tomorrow.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Curious Little Johnny

asks his Grandpa, "Do you still have sex with Grandma?"

"Yes son, but only oral sex."

"What is that?"

"I say fuck you, she says fuck you too."

An Asian American man is curious about his lineage

An Asian American man is curious about his lineage. He decides to find out more about his biological parents. His adopted parents always told him that he was born in China, so he starts there.

He digs around and tries to find out more about his parents. He searches for any information regardi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man goes into a pub and notices a big jar filled with $50 bills on the bar counter and gets curious

MAN: What is this jar thing, there must be hundreds of dollars in it ?
BARTENDER: We have a small game in our pub. Whoever completes three tasks correctly, wins the money in the jar.
MAN: What are the tasks then ?
BARTENDER: I can't tell you, you have to pay the $50 first.
Man gives the ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The curious doctor

I haven't seen this one here so hopefully it's not a repost...

A man goes in for a physical and when he drops his pants for the hernia check the doctor sees the patients balls are brown. Concerned, the doctor asks politely "Sir, did you know your balls are brown?"

Perturbed, the patien...

A curious child asked his mother...

“Mommy, why are some of your hairs turning grey?”

The mother tried to use this occasion to teach her child: “It is because of you, dear. Every bad action of yours will turn one of my hairs grey!”

The child replied innocently: “Now I know why grandmother has only grey hairs on her head....

Angela Merkel, Vladimir Putin and Donald Trump are shot during a conference and die...

Up in the sky, they are greeted by Saint Peter who says: ‚You have died. As you are politicians, surely you have sinned. Therefore you must wade through the Swamp of Lies before you can go to Heaven and join Him in eternal happiness.‘

As in her former life, Merkel wants to tackle every challe...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Just curious

"Honey, I have sad news - my gynecologist told me not have sex for three weeks..."

Husband: "And what did the dentist say?"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Curious Child

It's the night before Thanksgiving and a mom and dad are fighting in the living room. The child comes in, curious about all the yelling.

**"You're an Asshole!"** yells the mom.

**"Mom, whats an asshole?"** asks the child.

**"Men are."** answers the mom.

**"Well, you'...

Just curious if the name Pavlov...

Rings a bell.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A joke meant to be told to someone you wanna make love to... 10% success rate.

A curious rabbit escaped from the zoo and into wilderness... It went HOP HOP HOP until it spotted a cow.

Rabbit: What are you?
Cow: Do you really wanna know?
Rabbit: Yes!
Cow: Let's have sex first.
--love making--
Cow: I'm a cow.

So it went HOP HOP HOP again until it spo...

Curious fact: if all people of the world will stand in line on the Equator

Most of them will drown.

A Drunk Man Stumbles Out of A Bar...

...and sees two priests walking across the street. He staggers towards the two priests and stops in front of them.
He turns to the first priest and proudly says, “I’m Jesus Christ!” The first priest shakes his head and replies, “No, son, you’re not.”
He then turns to the second priest and say...

A guy had a very curious neighbour

... Once he was walking up the stairs with a bag of bones. His neighbour was, of course, spying on him, and when he saw him he said:

"What are you doing with that bag of bones, are you making a party for dogs?" He immediately replied:

"Oh, you didn't receive your invitation?"

(...

I think my son is bi-curious

We were rolling through the village and he was pretty obviously checking out everyone's bikes.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Little Johnny was curious about something

One day, Little Johnny was taking a shower with his mother. He looks up at her breasts, curious as to what they are. The next day, he decides to ask his father.

"Daddy, what are those big bouncy things on Mommy's chest?" Little Johnny asks.

The dad, deciding to mess with his son, says ...

I'm curious about the French flag.

When did they add the blue and red stripes?

The curious monk

A monk in an ancient monastery is doing his daily work, transcribing and recopying the ancient scrolls and scriptures of his tradition that his predecessors wrote, which they copied from their ancestors texts and so on....

The curious monk begins to wonder if in the endless sequence of copyin...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Curious Children

A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, “Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex.” The...

A woman dies and goes to the gates of heaven.

When she gets there, she is perplexed and confused to find everyone furiously cracking eggs, dumping flour, and mixing batter.

She turns around and sees an entire section dedicated to decoration, with elaborate concoctions of strawberries, frosting, and tiering at every station.

Fina...

My sister was getting curious...

My younger sister asked my dad: "What does the phrase 'the birds and the bees' mean?"

My dad replied, "Well, they have the same relationship that trees and flowers have."

"What is that supposed to mean?" my sister exclaimed, to which my dad replied:

"They both beat around the bu...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Republican primary race should be called "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"

It's way too long, and the protagonists are becoming more juvenile as it goes on.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a sexually curious Eskimo?

Bi-polar

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Doctors and nurses

A woman brings eight-year-old Johnny home and tells his mother that he was caught playing doctors and nurses with Mary, her eight-year-old daughter.

Johnny's mother says, "Let's not be too harsh on them... they are bound to be curious about sex at that age."

"Curious about sex?" replie...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A little boy sees his grandpa drinking bourbon and gets curious...[NSFW]

A little boy sees his grandpa drinking bourbon and gets curious. "Grandpa," he says, "Can I have some of your drink." His grandpa responds, "Can your dick reach your butthole yet?" The little boy is confused and says no. "Well then you're too young to drink my bourbon, son."

A few days later ...

The curious case of the lost washcloth

There was a little boy whose mother was about to have a baby. One day the little boy walked in and saw his mother naked, he asked his mother what was the hair in between her legs?

She responded, "It's my washcloth".

Weeks later after the mother had the baby, the young boy walked
in ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A young Native American brave was curious about how he received his name, so he went to ask his father, the chieftain of the tribe.

"Father," he asked, "how is it that I acquired my name."

"Well, my son, I named you and both of your brothers for an event which occurred on the day each of you were born. For example, the day your eldest brother was born, I saw a deer running swiftly through the forest, so I named him Deer R...

A very curious kid

Kid: “Papa, are you growing taller all the time?”
Father: “No, my child. Why do you ask?”
Kid: “Because the top of your head is poking up through your hair.”

I'm curious what my vegetarian friend will bring to the superbowl party tonight.

Hopefully it's an apology.

An old, tired-looking dog wandered into the yard. I could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home.

He followed me into the house, down the hall, and fell asleep on the couch. An hour later, he went to the door, and I let him out. The next day he was back, resumed his position on the couch and slept for an hour. This continued for several weeks. Curious, I pinned a note to his collar: 'Every after...

The police stops a man and woman who have their seatbelts on.

Police: "hi you're the first people today with their seatbelts on, so we want to give you an award of 5000 dollar."

The policeman seeing the happy couple gets curious and asks "what are you going to do with the money?"

The man answers: "I'm going to take lessons for my driver's license...

A young tree, curious about his lineage, asked an older tree, "Am I the son of a beech, or the son of a birch?"

The older tree replied, "I don't know, but your mom was the finest piece of ash in the forest!"

Three people die and appear before Buddha

Stunned by the divine presence before them, they lower their heads.

-Raise your heads. You were humble in life and your deeds were praiseworthy. You have earned the right to a reincarnation of your choice. You have much to accomplish yet though.

One of the people takes a step forward a...

The Boss.

One day a man goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. The assistant takes the man to the parrot section and asks him to choose one.

The man asks, “How much is the yellow one?”

The assistant replies that it costs $2,000. The man is shocked and asks the assistant why it’s so expensive. “This...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A curious son asks his father...

"Dad, what's the difference between a real world an an imaginary world?"

"I'll let you know," says the father, but first bring your sister here. The sister promptly arrives, and the father asks: "So, my darling girl, I'm going to ask you a very personal question but you must promise to answer...

How to make an idiot curious?

I'll post the answer tomorrow.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A limerick about vaginas I wrote five years ago

There once was a gal from Cancun,

Who had a most curious poon.

T'was coarse like a thistle,

But tight as a whistle,

And whilst cumming, could play you a tune.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Curious cherokee boy.

A young cherokee boy approached his wise old grandfather. " granfather", he said, how do we get owe names. "well", said grandfather. When a man becomes a father, as soon as his wife has given birth the man walks out of the tent and the first thing he sees becomes the babies name. So if ...

A young woman was moving into a new home in the suburbs—her first time away from family.

She decided to take residence in a house that was built by a small family several years ago. There was some construction to be done, however, so she called one of her friends who had a background in architecture to point her in the right direction.

He arrived early one morning, surveying the ...

A Mom visits her son for dinner who lives with a girl roommate.

During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty his roommate was.She had long been suspicious of a

relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious....

​

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A skinny little white guy walks into an elevator, looks up and sees this HUGE black guy standing next to him.

The big guy sees the little guy staring at him, looks down and says "7 feet tall, 350 pounds, 15 inch penis, 3 pound left testicle, 3 pound right testicle, Turner Brown."

The little guy faints and falls to the floor.

The big guy kneels down and brings him to, shaking him. The big guy s...

At the gates of heaven Gabriel is deciding fates.

A man walks up ranting of misfortune. When asked why he's so mad he explained

" I was sure my wife was cheating on me. So one day I left work early to catch her in the act. When I walked into our apartment she was surprised. Nude and sweaty so I knew someone was there. I look under the bed i...

My friend is a prison warden currently doing sensitivity training. His homework entails "What would you do if you saw two curious inmates indulging in intercourse? "

I said "Why can't we just let bi-cons be bi-cons?!"

A newlywed farmer and his wife were visited by her mother, who immediately demanded an inspection of the place. While they were walking through the barn, the farmer's mule suddenly reared up and kicked the mother-in-law, unfortunately killing her instantly.

At the funeral service, the farmer stood near the casket and greeted folks as they walked by. The pastor noticed that whenever a woman would whisper something to the farmer, he would nod his head "yes" and say something. Whenever a man walked by and whispered to the farmer, he would shake his head "...

How do you keep someone curious?

I'll tell you on my next post

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The town busy-body is curious about the local minister and his beautiful young housekeeper...

The talk is that they're having a secret affair, but nobody can prove it.

So Mildred goes to dinner one night to investigate. The house is immaculately clean, and everything seems above board. There is absolutely nothing suspicious going on. The two of them even have separate bedrooms on opp...

An out-of-towner drove his car into a ditch in a desolated area.

Luckily, a local farmer came to help with his big strong horse named Buddy.

He hitched Buddy up to the car and yelled, "Pull, Nellie, pull." Buddy didn't move.

Then the farmer hollered, "Pull, Buster, pull." Buddy didn't respond.

Once more the farmer commanded, "Pull, Jennie, pu...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man and a woman are sitting beside each other in the first class section of the plane. The woman sneezes, takes a tissue, gently wipes her nose, and shudders quite violently in her seat.

The man isn’t sure why she is shuddering and goes back to reading.

A few minutes pass. The woman sneezes again. She takes a tissue, gently wipes her nose and shudders quite violently in her seat.

The man is becoming more and more curious about the shuddering.

A few more minutes ...

Lessons Learned the Hard Way

Daddy's car in the woods?


Little Johnny watched his daddy's car pass by the school playground and go into the woods.Curious, he followed the car and saw Daddy and Aunt Jane in a

passionate embrace.


Little Johnny found this so exciting that he could hardly contain himself...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy walks into a bar with a dog...

... The bartender looks up and says, "You can't come in here with that mutt!"

The guy says, "Whoa, whoa, whoa! This ain't no ordinary dog. As a matter of fact, you should be paying for my drinks, because this dog is going to draw a crowd. It's a talking dog."

The bartender scoffs, but ...

[Long] Rabbi Goldman, World Traveller, comes to a lovely island in the South Pacific.

It's a beautiful place, lush and vibrant, and it's home to a tribe called the Trids. Goldman makes a good impression on them, and they're a very welcoming people already, so it' s not long before they're having a nice cookout to welcome him.

While they're eating, Rabbi Goldman looks inland, a...

A woman is walking home with her three daughters.

Rose asks her mother, “Mom, why did you name me Rose?”

To which her mother replies, “Well sweetie, when we where coming home from the hospital with you a rose fell on your head!”

Lily, curious now, asks her mother, “Mom, why did you name me after a flower too?”

To which her mot...

A man walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer.

The man says he is going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.

The loans officer says the bank will need some kind of security for such a loan, so the man hands over the keys and documents of a new Bentley Continental, parked on the street in front of the bank. Every...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Husband says to his wife that he is going golfing. She gets upset because she thought they would spend the day together.

Husband: "honey just give me the day I need to relieve some stress. Besides You don't even golf."


Wife: "I want to learn and besides it's something we can do together."


The husband begrudgingly accepts his wife request and they go to the golf course. On the first tee the hu...

Curious

A young boy walks in to the kitchen one Sunday morning while his dad is reading the newspaper.

"Where does poo come from?" He asks.

The father feeling a little agitated that his 5 year old son is already asking difficult questions thinks for a moment and says:

"Well you know we ...

Man dies and goes to heaven

Man dies and goes to heaven, he is greeted by an angel. The angel takes him to a room full of clocks. Surprised, the man asks the angel as to why there are so many clocks. The angel replies “Every man has a clock, every time he lies the clock moves one second”.

The man asks to show Lincoln’s ...

Why did the Chicken Cross The road?

The chicken lived on one side of the street since chickhood. Curious what was on the other side of the street, he attempted many times but his mother hen would always scold him. He finally stopped trying to see what was over after he went to chicken school. He maid friends and grew a big reputation ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a bi-curious woman?

A clitourist.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Native American boy and his cheif are sitting in a teepee together.

The boy asks the chief, "How did my mother get her name?"

The chief replies, "Well, that is a good question. Women give birth in this very teepee, and I name them what I see outside the teepee at the moment of birth. Your mother, RunningDeer, was named because when I looked outside, I saw a d...

Johnny's dad wanted Johnny to take a shower

Johnny's dad told Johnny to take a shower. "I'm scared, can I take a shower with you?" Johnny said. "No, son, that would be weird," his father replied. "Pleeeasee?" he cried. "Okay, okay, but just don't look down.."

Johnny, being the curious boy he was, looked down. "Dad, what's that?" he ask...

A Sunday school teacher asked her class to learn one fact about Jesus by the following Sunday. The following week she asked each of them what they had found.

Susie said, “He was placed in a manger.”

Bobby said, “He threw money changers out of the temple.”

Little Johnny said, “He has a pick-up truck but doesn’t know how to drive it.”

Curious, the teacher asked, “And where did you find that?”

“From my daddy.” He replied. “Yester...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One day, Billy saw Mom jumping on Dad in bed.

During breakfast the next morning, Billy asks Mom "Why do you jump on Daddy before going to bed every night?". The Mom, looking over at Dad with a embarrased expression, says "Well, your Daddy gets very fat every night eating dinner, so I have to jump on him to get his stomach flat.". The Son says "...

Two men were standing around and taking a break in their soon-to-be new store.

As yet, the store wasn't ready, and didn't even have the shelves set up.

A curious old man walked to the window, had a peek, and in a soft voice asked,
“Vat ya sellin' here?"

One of the men replied sarcastically, "We're selling idiots."

*Without skipping a beat, t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Extra Spoon

Linda was dining at an incredibly fancy restaurant. It was so posh and refined, Linda was mortified when she knocked her spoon off the table as soon as the waiter delivered her soup. But, without hesitation, the waiter produced a replacement from the pocket of his apron.

"Thanks so much," sa...

A man walks into a bar with his dog and sees another man sitting with his turtle

The man with the turtle is sitting with piles of cash in front of him.

The man with the dog is curious so he asks, "What's the deal with all the cash?"

The man with the turtle responds, "Well this here turtle is the fastest pet in the state. Ain't nobody else's pet faster than my turt...

I'm not really a fully committed capitalist...

...I'm what they call buy-curious.

A guy visits NYC for the first time and decides to go see Chinatown.

As he’s walking around, amongst all the Chinese shops he spots a bakery called “Hans Olufsen’s Bakery”. Feeling curious, he walks in. Inside he sees an all Chinese staff, with several Chinese pastries on display. Even more curious, he notices the guy who looks like the manager and talks to him:
<...

A little boy was walking past a D-Day memorial along the beach

As he passed by, he could see an old man shaking his head and letting out a long sigh. Curious as to what his story was, the little boy walked up to the man and said "Hey mister, why do you look so sad?"

The man looked at the child and said "More than 70 years ago, my friends fought on this b...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.