Floors Jokes

When they arrived back at the hotel from the convention, the receptionist told them, "I'm terribly sorry, but all the elevators are broken. In the meantime, you will have to take the stairs."

Now, Al was a writer of funny stories, Ben was a writer of scary stories, and Carl was a writer of sa... read more

It is also the most expensive car in the world, and it costs him $1.5M. He takes it out for a spin and stops at a red light.

An old man on a moped, looking about 90 years old, pulls up next to him.

The old man looks over at the sleek shiny car and asks, “What kind of car ya got there,... read more

But what do I know? I'm a ceiling fan.

Tyler

Concrete floors are really hard to crack.

Then he said "you were thinking about the egg weren't you!"

They have a type of elevated humor

It was tile by friar.

"But I have a PhD..."

"Oh sorry, give me the broom, I'll show you how its done."

Well, I guess it *is* holey ground....

I can't stand being without them.

...if you lay them right the first time, you can walk all over them for years.

They make up stories.

It's like everything falls to them.

I really appreciate beautiful Travertine floors.

A lot of other people, however, take them for granite.

He just thought they were beneath him

It had wooden seats, wooden doors, wooden steering wheel, wooden floors and a wooden engine. Unfortunately when I tried to start it, it wooden work.

A store that sells husbands has just opened,
where a woman may go to choose a husband.

Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONCE!

There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper a... read more

Then knock yourselves out

... on the first floor there is an artist, on the second there's a plummer, the third there is a blind man, and on the fourth there is a woman taking a shower. The woman taking a shower hears a knock on the door, she gets out of the shower, puts her robe on and opens the door. It's the artist, "I ju... read more

Jesus swept

I heard he got fired because he never measured up

...He only works in the downstairs area anyway...

It’s like they think it’s beneath them or something

That way if you got bored you could just watch the bishop!

There, he talks to the manager of the asylum, who guides him through it.

"Let me explain to you how this building works. In the first floor, we've got the inmates that aren't very crazy. On the second floor, we've got the ones who are just a bit crazy. On the third floor, we have the ones who... read more

Sorry if that's a sweeping generalisation.

Because of pulp friction.

The first floor will be a hexagon the 2nd pentagon, ah you dont need to hear it from me, each story has diffrent sides anyways

Apollo Screed

He thinks furiously for a moment and then floors it, 95... 100.. 110... Finally, with the officer still hot on his tail he slows to a crawl and pulls over to the roadside.

The officer, obviously on edge, cautiously approaches the car as the man rolls down the window and places hands out where... read more

The librarian says "Unfortunately no, we store our books on shelves like everyone else".

So a new store opened up in town where women can go and find the love of their lives. There are some rules though:

1. You can only shop once. Ever.
2. The quality of the 'merchandise' increases as you go up a floor (there are 6 floors total)
3. You can choose any product from any floor,... read more