Dare Jokes - 63 Hilarious Dare Jokes

A girl is dared by a boy to climb the school flagpole.

She bets him five dollars that she can and he agrees. She climbs all the way to the top and gets her five bucks.

She tells her mom after school, feeling proud of her accomplishment.

“Oh honey, he just wanted you to climb the pole so he could see your underwear.” She says, shaking her h...

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My sister was playing Truth or Dare with her friends.

I listened from behind the door. The bottle landed on my sister and she said, "Truth."

"When was the last time you had an orgasm?" her friend asked.

My sister replied, "A week ago."

I burst in through the door and yelled, "I knew you were faking it last night."

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I asked my friend if he would ever dare to shave his nut sack with a straight razor

He said he tried it once while in college, but it was so bad that he hasn't got the balls to try it again.

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My mate Paul said he superglued his asshole as a dare once

I'm pretty sure he is full of shit

My wife bet me that I wouldn’t dare give our daughter a silly name.

So I decided to call her Bluff.

I went and deliberately contracted measles for a dare...

...that was a rash decision

A Frenchman, an Italian and a Russian all end up in hell. The Frenchman begs to make one last call home to see how his family is coping. The devil says fine, it’ll cost you an extra thousand years in the flames. The Frenchman agrees, and tearfully listens to his wife doing his brother.

The Italian begs to call home to see how his daughters are doing. That’ll be an extra thousand years in the flaming pit, says the devil. So be it, says the Italian, and weeps as he listens to his children selling the farm.

Now I want to call home, says the Russian, and grabs the receiv...

Me and my friends were playing Truth and Dare the other day

I choose Dare
They dared me to go home

A young girl accepts a dare, and wins a dollar

she tells her mom about it, saying how the boys dared her to climb a post.

"Silly girl, that's so they could look up your skirt."

So the next day, the girl comes back and says "They tried to make me climb that post again, but I outsmarted them this time!"

"Really? What did you ...

Guy: "Truth or Dare?"

Gir: "Truth!"

Guy: "What's your phone number?"

Girl: "Eh.. let's do dare"

Guy: "I dare you to give me your phone number."

Don't you dare hit that drum again!

If you do, there will be repercussions!

My girlfriend dared me to take schizophrenia meds.

Now she's gone missing.

I invented a new word.

Plagiarism.

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EDIT : This joke was invented by me and copyrighted. Dare to take it and a lawsuit shall find you.

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A 7-year-old is sitting on a park bench eating a chocolate bar.

The man sitting next to him looks over and says, "Eating that many chocolate bars is bad for you."

The boy looks over and responds, "My great grandfather lived to be one hundred and five".

The man replies, "And he ate that much chocolate?"

"No" says the boy, "But he minded his o...

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A man is dared to stay 3 months in the dessert without masturbating

The man is told that he will receive 1.000.000$ if he can resist in the dessert for 3 months without masturbating
He will get a house, full with electicity, food and water supply for 3 months

The guy then asks:

-But what about sex?

The other guy replies:

-Uhm...you ca...

How DARE you all make fun of 50 Cent’s weight from last night?!

It took a lot of courage for those two guys to hang upside down on national television!

Wife : How dare you saved my mobile number as Covid 19

Husband : Because you take my breath away!

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A mother comes home from work to find that her kids are hiding behind the couch. She asks what's wrong, and the kids reply that Aunt Sally was in the house naked.

So she goes to her bedroom to investigate, and she finds her husband lying on the bed naked and sweaty. She asks, "What's going on?" He replies, "I'm having a heart attack."

She says "I'm going to call 911" and runs to the bathroom to get an aspirin. In the bathroom closet however, she disco...

Strange game of truth or dare

I was at this party the other night, with my Asian friend, Yu. This guy is always down to to anything, so I bring him along wherever I go. Real life of the party, if you know what I mean. Anyways, me and my friends had this really strange twist on truth or dare, we invented a new type of dare called...

I said “I love you” to my cake.

It burst into tiers.

Edit: rip my inbox!

Edit 2: so many awards but no gold? I dare you to gild me. Go ahead, make my day!

Edit 3: Guys I was being sarcastic and referencing the movie Sudden Impact (cries in being old). Whoever gilded me just wasted their coins but still, thanks...

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The Dive-Bar Dare

A man walks into a bar, notices a very large jar on the counter, and sees that it's filled to the brim with $10 bills. He guesses there must be at least ten thousand dollars in it. He approaches the bartender and asks, "What's with the money in the jar?"

"Well..., you pay $10, and if you pass...

"Chun Li, truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"Where's Beth's dog?"

"Dare."

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There once lived a strong, Native American man who had only one testicle

Everyone in the village called him "One stone" because of this, but nobody dared to say it to his face because he would kill anyone who directly said it him. Unfortunately, a woman in the village named Bluebird did not know about this. One morning, while she was walking past One Stone, she greeted h...

For those who dare steal Death's pillows..

Prepare yourself for the reaper cushions

A priest visits his cousin, who is also a priest.

The two priests, both in their forties, sit down to dinner.

The visiting priest says, "Cousin, I couldn't help noticing that your housekeeper is quite a young and attractive woman. I take it relations between the two of you are not always completely platonic?"

"How dare you! I am a man...

I once was dared to eat a clock

I would not recommend doing it, as it was really time consuming.

Was not that bad though, i even had seconds...

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Me and my friends were playing truth or dare

Then i got to give a dare so i grabbed a unlabeled CD and told my friend to put his dick in it, he did so and asked why, then i said

"This CD contains a movie with a touching story about a old man that loses his wife and best friend so he decides to fly away with his house using balloons but ...

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My friend once dared me to take a shit on electrified train tracks.

That was the last time I put my ass on the line for him.

A high-society debutant is engaged to a low-born Greek guy...

Before the wedding, her mother takes her aside and says, "I've tried to talk you out of marrying this man, but you seem determined to go through with it, so just promise me one thing"

"Greeks have unnatural desires in the bedroom that are perverse, nasty, and disgusting. Just promise me now, ...

My friend once dared me to adopt a baby cow, so I did, and now I have a barn full of them.

I guess that's what you'd call raising the steaks.

A woman tries getting on a bus but realises her skirt is too tight.

As the bus stopped & it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus. Slightly embarrassed & with a quick smile to the driver, she reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little thinking that this...

My wife dared doubt my craftsmanship when I was changing over the light switch.

Haha, she's in for a shock!

I dare you to get neutered

You won’t, no balls

My crush was dared to ask me out

So she asked me to leave

I dared to ask my wife why she’s buying a giant tub of Whiteout from the store.

Big mistake.

Someone dared me to make a joke with only four letters.

EZPZ

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I will swallow a tangled up rope right now if you dare me

I shit you knot

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The Drunk and a priest

On a bus, a priest sat next to a drunk who was struggling to read a newspaper.

Suddenly, with a slurred voice, the drunk asked the priest:

"Do you know what arthritis is?"

The parish priest soon thought of taking the opportunity to lecture the drunk and replied:

"It's a ...

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NSFW: On a dare, I stuck my dick in the meat grinder at work and and then I got fired...

...And she got fired too

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A man, a pub and a dare

A man goes to a pub for a drink and spies on the counter a glass jar filled with $50 notes.
"bartender, what's this then" the man asks while pointing to his favourite ale on tap.
"oh, that's for the local dare we got set up, put in $50, you do three things and you get the whole jar. First yo...

What do you call 8 men who refuse to do a single dare?

An octopus

I was dared to eat a spoonful of dry ice.

It tasted sublime!

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A lawyer is sitting in his parked BMW when a tow truck crashes into the car.

The crash takes car door clean off and the driver speeds away. The lawyer immediately signals a cop and begins ranting about how much the damage to his car is going to cost. The cop replies, "You lawyers are so materialistic. All you care about is money."

The lawyer says, "How DARE you call ...

DareDevil's costume is amazing at keeping his identity a secret

No one will ever see through his disguise, not even him.

After my friend poured ketchup in his eyes for a dare he exclaimed, “This was a terrible idea.”

Heinz sight is 20/20

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Son: “Mom, Dad, I’m gay”

Mom: *looks at Dad*

Dad: *clenches fist*

Mom: “don’t you dare!”

Dad: “hi gay, I’m Dad!”

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The Indian With One Testicle

There once was an Indian who had only one testicle
And whose given name was 'Onestone'.
He hated that name and asked everyone not to call him Onestone.
After years and years of torment,
Onestone finally cracked and said,'
If anyone calls me Onestone again I will kill them!'
The wor...

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One day, King Arthur had to leave Camelot to go for a diplomatic hunt. Worried about his wife's potential infidelity, he asks Merlin to fashion her a chastity belt...

Merlin assures the king that anything that is put through the hole in the chastity belt will be immediately cut off with magic.

Satisfied, King Arthur goes on his hunt. When he returns several days later, he immediately goes to the Knights of the Round Table and asks all of them to drop thei...

It was so hot today that I didn't dare to leave my dog alone in the car.

In the end I decided to leave my baby there too to keep him company.

A guy is down on his luck and tells his friend he would do anything on a dare for 10 bucks...

The friend says "Ok, I'll give you 10 bucks if you don't change your underwear for a month."

The guy agrees, and when they shake on it, says "I win, and you owe me 20."

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A young man and his boss have to travel to a city 500 miles away. Due to cost cutting measures put in place by the boss, they take the train instead of the flight which was four hours faster.

As they entered their train compartment, the young man and the boss found themselves opposite to a gorgeous twenty something girl and her sixty year old looking mother.

Within a few minutes, the young man and the girl start giving quick glances at each other. After twenty minutes or so, the ...

Mother Superior wakes up and gets out of bed one morning in the convent.

She begins her usual walk down a long hallway, with rooms for the other nuns lining either side. Immediately one of the nuns looks at mother superior and says "It looks like someone got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning!"

Mother Superior is a little taken aback by this comment, bu...

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A LAWYER is getting out of his BMW when a semi rolls by, taking the open door clean off. A nearby cop has seen all of this, and runs over.

The lawyer immediately starts screaming and gesticulating about the value of his beamer and how much it’s going to cost him to get it fixed.

The cop loses his patience and says, “You lawyers are so materialistic. All you care about is money!”

The lawyer is incensed and says, “How dare...

A woman once gave birth to 100 children

To avoid confusion, she simply named them after the number of their conception. Unfortunately all of them except for #90 died at a very young age.

90 was a little girl who grew up to be a great woman. She married at a young age and gave birth to two children, a daughter and a son. Unlike her ...

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I dare someone to pull off this joke IRL.

A manager calls one of his employes because he is very late for work.
The employee picks up the phone. The boss enquires, "John, why aren't you at work?" John responds, "I have a medical condition." Concerned the manager asks, "What is it?" John replies, "I have anal glaucoma." The manager respo...

When a group of tourists visited a crocodile farm, the owner said “If anyone jumps in, swims to the coast and survives , I’ll give you $ 1 million.”

No one dared to move. But suddenly, a man jumped into the water and desperately swam to the shore while being chased by all the crocodiles.

The owner announced “We have a brave winner!”

After collecting his reward, the man and his wife returned to their hotel. Upon arrival, the manager...

Girl: I'm having a party at my house, we're playing Truth or Dare and Twister, can you come?

Guy: I already did.

Yesterday I got dared to have surgery that prevented me from moving my neck...

There's no turning back now

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A girl saw a guy scratching his testicles in public.

Girl : how can you scratch your private parts in public? I can never dare to do any such thing.

Guy : That's because you don't have the balls to do it.

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Chuck Norris was born by his aunt…

because nobody dared to fuck his mother

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Fuck Chuck Norris ..

If he is as strong and powerful as everyone states, I dare him to come to my house and bash my head in the keyboarddfrljkl;kjtpog496yasdfjknxirhsmfsjfigdjsyebxhsueyxbxjdobdbzhcvhsivdbdindgdyhdbisbdbdhbshhshsudjshgsidbbdhdydhdbksjdbdyyshdbuendheibdjdidn

A painter walks up to a church and offers to paint it.

The church manager agrees. Business isn’t going well for the painter so he decides to save some money by adding water to thin the paint. He gets a few days in and a massive storm appears out of nowhere with lightning and thunder crashing around him. A booming voice comes from the clouds, “How dare y...

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My friends dared me to take Viagra and a laxative at the same time.

So I went and sat on the toilet and I couldn't tell if I was cumming or going.

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