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Car Wash Jokes

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To me, perfect sex is like a car wash

You start by lining up right and going in slow and you finish when three Mexican dudes run up and furiously towel you off.

Why did the prison escapee stop at the car wash?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!

I used to work in a car wash, but I wasn't very productive.

In hindsight, it probably wasn't the most practical place for a painter.

Car Wash

Yesterday, I was washing the car with my son. He said: ‘dad, can’t you just use a sponge?’

I’ve been looking for a car wash that does a thorough job cleaning wheels,

But whenever I google “Best Rimjob” I get sleepy and take a nap.

A blonde walks into a bar

Asks for a car wash

Unexpected car wash...

So a guy in a pick up truck goes to a car wash, after a few minutes he gets waved in and starts to drive away. He looks back and sees a Spanish guy drying his rear window in the bed of his truck. He freaks out, swerves and a cop who sees all of this pulls him over. While the cop is walking up to the...

My dalmatian got away from me and ran through a car wash.

Now he's spotless.

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Got approached by a prostitute today who said she would do anything for $10

Guess who just got their car washed?

Just got my free yearly car wash

Thanks California!

A man goes into a car wash with a semi truck and comes out in a pickup truck

Everyone was confused what happened and they all asked the man what he thought had happened to his truck. He simply shrugged and said, “What can I say, it shrunk in the wash.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Go to the car wash after driving in the mud and no one bats an eye....

Go to the dentist right after eating oreos, and suddenly you're an asshole?

Saw a sign at a gas station earlier that said "car wash out of order."

So I waxed my car, sprayed it with water and then applied soap.

On my Bucket list:

1. Pail
2. Mop Bucket
3. Ice Bucket
4. Car Washing Bucket
5. Climb Mt. Everest
6. Livestock Bucket

I got fired from my job today.

It started when I was looking for a job on a streets, and I found a hiring sign for a car wash that was asking for help from Sign Designers. I decided to apply and they accepted me! The Car Wash I was working for was offering wheel cleanings for $4 dollars for the weekend. So I was asked to make a s...

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