Juan arrives at the Mexico/US border

Juan comes up to the Mexican border on a bicycle. He's got 2 large bags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and says, "What's in the bags?"
"Sand," answered Juan.
The guard says, "We'll just see about that. Get off the bike." The guard takes the bags and rips them apart; he empties them ou...

Why can't bicycles stand up on their own?

Because they're "two tired"

Why can’t bicycles stand up on their own?

They’re all two-tyred.

Two nuns are riding their bicycles down the street.

The first nun says “follow me, I know a shortcut”.

The second nun says “I haven’t came this way before”.

“Yeah” says the first nun “the cobblestone will do that to you”.

I like my women how I like my bicycles.

Chained up in the garage.

After a busy day, when we get into bed we become bicycles.

Too tired.

2 nuns on bicycles

2 nuns, on bicycles, rode down this street. The second nun called to the first “I’ve never come this way before” and the first nun called back “it’s the cobblestones!”

Guy crosses the border on a bicycle with two bags over his shoulder

The guard stops him and asks:
"What's in the bags?"
"Nothing but sand sir"
So he examines the bags and indeed nothing but sand.
"Ok you're clear move on"
Two weeks later, same thing.
So this guy goes on for months, every two weeks same bags, same sand and they find nothing and i...

The Berlin Wall Guard

A guard stood in the East crossing of the Berlin Wall when he is approached by a man on a bicycle, carrying a suitcase.

"Before I let you cross, I need to check what's inside your suitcase," the guard says, and takes the suitcase. He puts on his gloves, and opens the case for examination only...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

My neighbor stopped by to tell me my dogs had been chasing people on bicycles

Bull shit, my dogs don't even have bicycles!

Three men approached the gate to heaven.....

Three men approached the gate to heaven and as there was only one opening left, the gatekeeper said that whoever had the most remarkable and worthy death could enter. He asked the first man how he died, and the man replied, "Imagine this -- I suspected my wife was having an affair behind my back and...