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What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?

Attire

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One day, Billy's teacher asked him, " I heard your mom had a baby. What did she have?"

Billy paused and thought for a moment and said, "I think she had a bicycle."

"Now Billy, you know that your mom didn't have a bicycle. What did she have?"

"Maybe it was a tricycle."

"Billy, don't stand there and lie to me. We're going to the principal's office right now!"
...

Why don't elephants ride tricycles?

They don't have a thumb to ring the little bell.

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Grandpa, Can I Have a Tricycle?

A very young James went to his grandfather and asked for a tricycle.



Grandfather asked, "Jimmy, can your weewee reach all the way to your butthole?"



"Well, no Grandpa, it can't", Jimmy replied sheepishly.



Grandpa said to come back and talk when it could.<...

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A mounted policeman stops his horse next to a little girl and her tricycle.

He leans over the side of the horse, and says "That's a nice trike, did Santa give it to you for Christmas?". The little girl proudly says yes. "Well, it looks like he forgot to give you a helmet too," the policeman says, "I'm going to have to write you a ticket."
At this point, the little girl ...

What does a duck and a tricycle have in common?

They both have handlebars except the duck.

What do you say when you catch the person who stole your tricycle?

Wheel wheel wheel...

My rich cousin's hummer-porschaghini (Long)

So I have this cousin who is absolutely loaded and he had this idea he would pay the best mechanic around to build him custom car.

He wanted the body of a Lamborghini, with the engine of a Porsche, and all the amazing features of an original hummer. He decided to call it the Hummer-porschagh...

A man scuttled out to his garage and began pulling the lawn furniture out onto the driveway.

Shortly after he did the same with the lawnmower, a few gardening tools and a bicycle.

A curious neighbour wandered over and asked if he was going to have a garage sale.

“No,” replied the man. “My son just bought his first car and right now he’s getting ready for a big date.”

“S...

At the old junkyard some rusted vehicles were talking

The convertible race car looked around at everyone and said "Lets get out of here and go for a ride down the highway one last time."

The bicycle said "I can't I am just two tired".

The Unicycle and Tricycle at the same time exclaimed "We aren't two tired!"

The Motorcycle replies...

A married man dies and goes to heaven

When he arrives at the pearly gates, he's greeted by Saint Peter who explains the rules. "Heaven is a very big place so everyone who enters is assigned a vehicle", he says. "The status of your vehicle corresponds with how faithful you were in your marriage." Since our hero only cheated on his wife o...

The village of idiots.

There is a village of idiots. Every month the village gathers in the town square, where 3 people from the neighboring town each bring in an object so,the town's folk can guess what it is. It's great fun for the whole town women, men, young and old alike join the festivities. The first person walks t...

Heaven

So three men are waiting in heaven to get their vehicles, and the angel asks the first man “ have you ever cheated on your wife.” The man says “yes lots of times and gets a tricycle.

The next man comes up and the angel asks “have you ever cheated on your wife” the man says “only once” so he g...

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Little Johnny

Church is letting out on Sunday, and the preacher is standing outside shaking hands and saying goodbye to his parishoners. Little Johnny is hauling ass on his tricycle on the sidewalk, when the front wheel falls off. He goes end-over-end getting all banged up in the process, jumps up and says "godda...

Three men arrive at a checkpoint near the gates of heaven

The first man walks up to god, who is reading the summary of his deeds before deciding which vehicle he is to use to drive to heavens gates with.

"I see you were quite unfaithful with your wife, cheating on her a total of three times." The man looks down in shame. "You are to drive up to heav...

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There was this guy who bought an elderly circus elephant;

There was this guy who bought an elderly circus elephant; I don't know why. Alas, he couldn't afford to feed it. He'd never seen an elephant jump with all 4 feet off the ground. So he started a contest: entry was $10, and the first person to get the elephant to jump with all 4 feet off the ground wo...

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Three men find themselves at the pearly gates.

The first one approaches Saint peter. "Welcome to heaven's highways my friend" Peter says, "let me ask you, have you ever committed adultery or cheated on your spouse?". The first man admits there was one woman he had dated a while ago, but he apologized to his wife and ended it pretty quickly. Pete...

A man walks into a Coffee Shop

And orders an espresso. While drinking it, a massively scarred Norwegian dude stumbles in the bar.
"What happened?" The man asks as he downs his espresso.
"There's a Chupacabra 10km east from here." The Norwegian dude rasps before dying.
So the Man gets on his tricycle and travels 10km east...

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Barnyard antijokes, written by an AI

Q:
What's the difference between a horse and a duck?

A:
A horse has legs but a duck has feathers.

Q:
Why do elephants play hide-and-seek?

A: They don’t have to worry about winning.

Q:
How much is a cow worth?

Answer:
100 Pounds.

Q: ...

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