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Unicycle Jokes

Whats The Difference Between a Hobo On a Unicycle And a Man In a Suit On a Bike?

Attire.

When I am on my Unicycle I have lots of energy..

But on my bike I am two tired.

Why did Ryan Murphy ride a unicycle?

Because he thinks *bi*cycles are just deep in the closet.

Did you know unicycles are always happy to be ridden?

They never get two tired.

I rode my unicycle for 10 miles today

When I got home it wouldn't stand up on it's own.

It was one tired bike

What do you call a donkey on a unicycle?

A wheel-burro.

What is the difference between a well dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?

Attire

A circus performer is late to his next gig

Driving as fast as he can, he is soon pulled over by the police. The cop asks for his license, registration, and proof of insurance, and then asks him where he was going so fast.

"Well, officer, I'm a circus performer, and I'm headed to Springfield to do my juggling act, and I'm late."
...

I decided on riding my unicycle to work from now on

Because whenever I rode my bike I was always two tired when I got to work

My daughter walked out of her circus class with a unicycle over her shoulder - the instructor wants her to learn it.

I told her that's good because she won't get two tired.

(True story. My daughter does take circus class at the local gymnastics place, and she did walk out with a unicycle given by her instructor. I was obligated to respond with the proper level of dad-jokery.)

How do unicycles work?

By sheer power of wheel.

I’ve got a unicycle that’s great in the snow

It has all wheel drive

What's the similarity between smartly dressed people and a unicycle?

A-tire.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A penis is like a unicycle

It’s fun to ride, but don’t send pictures of it to strangers.

So, I can legit ride a unicycle. My mom told me it would never get me anywhere in life...

I looked her dead in the eye and said... “You’re wrong mom! Where there’s a wheel, there’s a way!”

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie

on a unicycle

Why do you have to dress so nicely when riding a unicycle?

Because attire is the most important thing about a unicycle

A newlywed couple goes on a honeymoon to the Middle East.

While there they got into a huge argument about the best mode of transportation; unicycle versus bicycles. The argument was so large they decided to divorce.
Cause of divorce:
Iraq and cyclable differences

My gf told me that I act like a clown

It was so unexpected and upsetting I stopped juggling and almost fell off my unicycle.

If there’s one thing I absolutely can’t stand

it’s a unicycle

Your sister asked me to bring her something hard to ride on.

I don't know why she got so mad, a unicycle is pretty hard to ride.

At the old junkyard some rusted vehicles were talking

The convertible race car looked around at everyone and said "Lets get out of here and go for a ride down the highway one last time."

The bicycle said "I can't I am just two tired".

The Unicycle and Tricycle at the same time exclaimed "We aren't two tired!"

The Motorcycle replies...

Why couldn't the old bike stay upright?

It was *two-tired.*

An oldy, but a goody, I hope you can *handle* it.

Changing *gears*, I *spoke* at a fancy unicycle conference and you know what's different there? *Attire.*

I'm just *pedaling* for upvotes.

Clothes make the man (Joke from my nephew)

What's the difference between a sharp-dressed fellow on a bicycle and a raggedy looking guy on a unicycle?

Attire.

If you ever feel like a third wheel, just stop....

You are not a third wheel. You are a majestic unicycle and they are your noble training wheels.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

New weights and measures

1. The ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi

2. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton

3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope

4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond

5. Weight an evangelist carries with Go...

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