So a time traveler meets George W Bush...

Time Traveler: "What year is it?"

George Bush: "2001"

TT: "Before or after the 9/11 terrorist attack?"

GB: "Before"

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Just found out from a time traveler who lost tonight’s debate!

America!

Enjoy the shit show. Cheers.

An OverweightTime Traveler goes to ancient rome

An Overweight Time Traveler goes to ancient rome and realizes he wore historically incorrect clothes for the trip. Realizing his mistake he visits a toga shop to purchase new clothes. He looks around the shop and realizes they do not have togas big enough to fit him. He goes to the counter and asks ...

A time traveler has traveled back in time to the year 1963.

However, he does not know the exact date.
He sees a CIA agent nearby and asks him:
"Is today before or after the JF-"

"Before"

We don't serve time travelers here

A time traveler walks into a bar

A traveler meets a blind hermit

Who tells him:"There's a clear distinction between us, young man", to which the traveler responds thoughtful: I see.. "

A traveler was walking along the side of the road in Arizona, hitchhiking on a dark night in the middle of a thunderstorm;

Time passed slowly and no vehicles went by. It was raining so hard he could barely see his hand in front of his face.


Suddenly he saw a car approaching, moving slowly and appearing ghost-like in the rain. It slowly and silently crept toward him and stopped.


Wanting a ride v...

A time traveler arrives in the year 2069 and decides to check in with Reddit to see if it's still around.

To his surprise it is. So he heads to /r/jokes to see what has developed in the world of humor.

To his surprise, each post consisted of just a number. Scrolling through, he saw that each vote had a hundreds of upvotes while 3527 had thousands and several awards to boot.

Puzzled, he ...

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Fucking a time traveler.

*"A blast from the past!"*

I think my wife is a time traveler

I've seen that doctors are saying you should avoid close physical contact to stop the spread of coronavirus. Somehow she knew about this years ago.

I met a time traveler today

Something strange happened to me this morning. I was walking my dog, when all of a sudden I heard a strange whooshing sound and out of nowhere a guy appeared on the side walk in front of me. He looked like he was in his twenties and was wearing really strange cloths. He was staring at a small techni...

Time travelers be like "I know a spot"

And go literally anywhere but 2020

A time traveler comes back from the year 2045

I encountered a time traveler today. During my self isolation he came to the door dressed in a hazmat suit. I was of course alarmed when I opened the door to such a site. He quickly explained who he was and asked if he could have just a few minutes of my time. I didn't believe anything he was sa...

I’m a time traveler, and I came here to tell you a joke from the future.

But it’s just too far ahead of its time.

Which type of traveler is the most calm?

Nomads.

A time traveler goes to eat. After his meal, he notices he's still hungry.

He goes back four seconds

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A time traveler goes back in time to force Hitler’s mom to have an abortion.

It was a miscarriage of justice.

Why did the tired traveler go to Romania?

So he could Bucharest.

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There is a traveler passing through the country and spots a farmer with his bull

The traveler stops and asks the farmer for the time to which the farmer says "sure" and proceeds to lift the bulls balls up with his hand and replies "3:34" the traveler confused asked the farmer how he knew the time by lifting the bulls balls and the farmer says "come closer" and lifts the bulls ba...

A traveler stopped at a monastery and they invited him to stay for a delicious dinner of fish and chips.

After dinner he went in the kitchen and asked a guy "Are you the fish friar?" and the guy said "No I'm the chip monk."

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A traveler walks into a bar in a foreign land...

He started up a conversation with a bar owner, Greg for confidence. Eventually they were talking about his business.

Greg: you see this bar? It took years to build this bar, to find every perfect piece of brick, to hone it into a perfect bar. But do they call me Greg the bar builder? No.
...

A nomad traveler is walking through a village in the country...

A nomad traveler is walking through a village in the country when a little boy comes running up and says, "Please, help, help, my mother is trapped in a well!" So the traveler comes to the mother's aid, she gives him some bread and a place to rest in thanks, and he moves on.

Next he is walkin...

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