UPJOKE

Johnnie Walker Jokes

John Wayne vs. Johnnie Walker

What the difference between John Wayne and Johnnie Walker?

Johnnie Walker is still killing indians.

Johnnie Walker, Jack Daniels and Jim Beam walk into a bar

What is this, said the bartender, Alcoholics Eponymous?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A round with the guys

\[Translated from a popular Punjabi joke\]

Tim's sitting around with the lads having drinks on a Saturday night.

A few drinks later, Tim claims:

"Guys, I have a special talent. I can name you the liquor brandname used in a drink, just from tasting it."

His buddies doubt h...

An Indian lady walks into a bar for the first time...

and sat infront of the bartender.


There were two men sitting beside her. One on her left and one on her right.


The man on the right said to the bartender: "Jack Daniels, single."


The man on the left said to the bartender: "Johnnie Walker, single."


Then...

A Rabbi, a Lutheran Priest and a Catholic Priest are preparing for a party

First the Rabbi goes into a liquor store and grabs Hennessy,
Then the Lutheran Priest goes into the liquor store and grabs Makers Mark
Finally the Catholic Priest goes into the preschool and grabs Johnnie Walker

Donald Trump, Kim Jong Un, and El Chapo are on a punctured hot air balloon that's quickly going down.

In order to slow their descent, they decide to throw stuff out of the basket in which they're riding.

El Chapo throws several bricks of cocaine over the side and says, "Don't worry, I've got tons of this stuff back in my country."

Following suit, Kim Jong Un throws over several bottles...

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