My grandfather says he survived mustard gas and pepper sprays during war.
He's a seasoned veteran.
Every time I turn on my friend’s mustang it sprays this weird fluid everywhere
And apparently he doesn’t want me to come over and take care of his horses anymore
A little boy and his grandfather are raking leaves in the yard.
The little boy sees an earthworm trying to get back into its hole. He says, "Grandpa, I bet I can put that worm back in that hole." The grandfather replies, "I'll bet you five dollars you can't. It's too wiggly and limp to put back in that little hole."
The little boy runs into the house and ...
One day Grandpa was watching Junior playing with an earthworm..
Grandpa said, " Junior, I will give you $10 if you can put that worm back down in its little hole."
The kids thinks and thinks, then runs into the house and returns with a can of hair spray. He sprays the worm all over and as it gets stiff he stuffs it down into the hole. Grandpa gives th...
My friend always sprays spittle when he’s bragging
Weird flecks but ok
What do you call a person who sprays deodorant at people and chokes them?
An axe murderer
A grandfather and grandson are taking a walk around the yard after a rainstorm.
Seeing worms all over the sidewalk the grandfather decided to play a little prank on his grandson. "Billy," he says "I'll give you ten dollars if you can take one of those worms and put it back in it's hole."
Thinking this to be impossible, he watched as Billy played around with a worm for a ...
A kid with hairspray
A kid is helping his grandpa doing yard work. The kid sees a worm creep up out of its hole. The kid has an aerosol of hairspray and bets his grandfather a dollar that if he sprays the worm with hairspray and put it back in, it will just stay there. Grandpa accepts the bet.
Sure enough, the ki...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
The Hawaii Special
Two guys are talking. “Hey, did you know about the Hawaii special at the strip club?”. “”No?”. “It’s sooo good. One of the dancers gets naughty with you, and once you get hard, she slips a pineapple slice on your penis and eats it.”. “Sounds great, I’m gonna try next weekend!”.
N...
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