I tried to catch fog the other day,

I mist.

What effect does mist have? (Dad joke alert.)

It mystifies.

RIP boiling water

You will be mist.

Bigamist…

What an Italian calls very thick fog

My half Native American friend Les tried to teach me to rain dance, but we could only ever muster a light mist...

I guess I'm just going to have to make dew with Les.

If you see someone drinking a Sierra Mist, punch them straight in the face...

...that's the first rule of Sprite Club.

A sketchy guy just came into my shop and bought six smoke machines. So I called the cops.

He must be a part of some extreme mist group.

It’s a shame your friend has to be de-atomized today.

He will be mist.

Forever mortal frenemies

Britain and France. Forever mortal frenemies. The rivalry goes back over 1000 years. One of the biggest sticking point has always been the channel. Is it the British channel or the French? In order to show how one country was superior in the rivalry every 100 years the 2 countries would hold a cross...

RIP boiling water

You will be mist.

So it was super foggy when I got up this morning.

I grabbed a big jar and went outside just to catch a bunch of fog and I put a lid on it. Came back in the house to check it out and the jar looked completely empty. So, while I thought I was capturing fog- I mist.

I wasn't able to catch my train...

The air was so foggy that I mist it.

A good friend of mine fell into a vaporiser and died...

She is sadly mist.

I was offered a job studying fog but I turned it down.

In hindsight, I think it was a mist opportunity.

What do you call it when you boil a water buffalo?

A mist steak

I met a girl who wanted to make love under a light spray of water, but I said no.

Looking back, I realize it was a mist opportunity.

Many people think that when warm droplets of water in the air are rapidly cooled it forms fog...

But it’s actually a common mist-conception!

It was so foggy this morning and I tried to grab some of the fog

Sadly, I mist.

RIP H2O...

You will be mist.

Saw this one in the bathroom of a school I'm taking classes at. I haven't seen it posted on here, it made me laugh.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It is a cold, foggy night, and several passengers are in a bus, driving along little lanes through the countryside.

Suddenly, the bus swerves violently. The passengers are irritated. A young man who was woken up by the bus's swerving says: "What happened?"

"Mist," the bus driver says, dismissively.

The young man thinks that yes, it is harder to drive in fog, and falls back asleep thinking nothin...

It's always a sad day when I end up having to boil water.

It will be mist.

Allways pay attention when you're working around propellers

If you don't, you'll be mist.

The guy who invented the vape died today.

He will be mist.

When i told my dad i was joining the Air Force, he gave me one piece of advice...

Son, always pay attention on the flight line, because if you don't, you will be mist.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Pig walks into a pub.

He goes up to the bar and sees a curious looking bottle bubbling away with mist emanating from the top. Slightly flummoxed he asks the barman, “What’s this about then?”

The barman replies, “Well, this is a mystic potion, a concoction of my very own. Take a sip and it’ll magically release your...

Sierra appears on a trivia game show. Her first question is about carbonated beverages. Sierra knows nothing about carbonated beverages.

Needless to say, Sierra Mist that question.

A man and his wife...

Are walking through the park when some grey clouds roll in. As the clouds open and water falls, the wife says, "Well isn't this a nice mist dear?" "Actually honey, it's rain," replies the husband. So they argue whether it's rain or mist for a little before the husband says, "You know what, how about...

A friend of mine was caught in an airplane turbine

In many ways, he *will* be mist

My band and I had our first significant gig tonight, but afterwards I realized that it would have been way cooler with a fog machine...

It was a huge mist opportunity.

So my boyfriend's kettle has boiled dry all the water inside and he said "RIP water..."

"You will be mist."

My grandparents were vaporised in a freak accident

They will be mist... :'(

I screwed up the scene in the movie where I walked through an incredibly light rain.

It was a mist take.

The CIA lost track of its operative in Ireland “Murphy. ”

The CIA boss says, “All I can tell you is that his name is Murphy and that he’s somewhere in Ireland. If you think you’ve located him, tell him the code words, “The weather forecast calls for mist in the morning. ” If it’s really him, he’ll answer, “Yes, and for mist at noon as well. ”

So the...

How do you call a bouncy airplane?

A Boing.

P.S. I came up with this on my own, yet have a feeling it mist've been here already, so please tell me if it's a repost. Thanks!

Under President Trump, ISIS continues to spread across Middle East

as a fine red mist.

5 Jokes about Boiling Water

1. Perhaps I shouldn't joke on here about boiling water, it might be too steamy.
2. RIP Boiling Water. You will be mist.
3. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
4. What do you get when your pour boiling water down a rabbit hole? Hot cross bunnies
5. One cannibal says ...

I over boiled some venison broth earlier...

It was deerly mist.

we are mostly water

that's how come we're mist when we die

What did the rising sun say to the morning dew?

You will be mist.

Fog father leaves his fog family

He is heavily mist

TIL It's a myth that people's joints hurt because it's cold and damp

Turns out it's just a mist ache.

My memory is kinda foggy...

A lot of the details get mist.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Story of the fly

In the dead of summer, a fly was resting on a leaf beside a lake. A hot,dry fly who said to no one in particular, "Gosh...if I go down three inches...I will feel the mist from the water and I will be refreshed."

There was a fish in the water thinking, "Gosh...if that fly goes down three inch...

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