Smell Jokes

Kermit’s Fingers

They come with an Elon Musk.

I can't tell if it was because the rest of his family was there, or because they were still on her.

It sure made the rest of the funeral awkward.

I said that was naan scents.

I said I’ve got a hard on but I didn’t know you could smell it

But not my Sister.

It is very refreshing

Your tongue.

But it can sometimes be hard getting their little legs apart.

Post Cologne

Cologne

Police: He's been trained to only react to the smell of drugs.

Me: *sigh* Yeah... my dog has a real problem.

I hate being a dwarf.

Because he plays with Pooh

Man, I hate babies.

So deaf people can enjoy them too.

sat down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading.

After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, "Sa... read more

Grandma's fingering herself again

For example a pistol won’t have a strong smell since it’s tiny.
An Assault rifle would smell like a lot of gun powder for how fast the bullets come out.
And apparently shotguns smell like teen spirit

They'd become ex-stinked.

"You smell that?" tom asked. Bob replied, "the heck I do, let’s find where it’s coming from!”. After 5 minutes of searching, the scent led them to a restaurant. Tom said "let’s get something to eat!" they both were hungry but bob reminded him that they couldn’t enter with their dogs! so tom said "it... read more

I can never get their tiny legs apart.

The gearbox in the wife's car...

Depends!

It was a particularly tough football game, and nerves were on edge. The home team had been the victim of three or four close calls, and they were now trailing the visitors by a touch-down and a field goal. When the official called yet another close one in the visitors' favor, the home quarterback bl... read more

...and asks for seconds.

My doctor says I have a rare condition called Tic Tac Toes.

Never let anyone see you walk out of the bathroom sniffing your fingers.

My coworker asked me this today. “Of course!” I replied

She interjected “How did you get their tiny legs apart?”

I'll go first... I love you and the smell of your hair,Please don't be home when I get there.


EDIT- I have to say, the rhymes and creativity; you all are incredible, Now I have to wonder who's most edible...(no really great job to all)

menu sir? asked the owner. I'm blind, just bring me one of your dirty forks, I will smell it and order. The confused owner went to the kitchen to retrieve a fork, and returned to the blind man.
The blind man smelled the fork with a deep breath, yes I will have the lamb with seasoned potatoes and... read more

Zay are, ow you say, "covered in sheet".

Snyphilis

I came to my senses

Have a joint discussion.

1: Open a can of beer and try to smell it.

2: If you can smell the beer, drink it to see if you can taste it.

3: If you can taste it and smell it, this confirms you don't have Covid.

Last night, I did the test 15 times and all were negative. Tonight I am going to do the test aga... read more

While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house.
The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets down to the task at hand. Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and smells the distinctive smell of paint.
He walks into the livin... read more

Odor 66

I call it Pollo For Men.

Stinkerbell!

Just reset to olfactory settings.

They had a Tutankhamun.

Olive Oil