What's that Italian dessert called where you pour espresso coffee over ice cream?

Everyone I ask can't remember either.

I poured my root beer into a square glass

..it became beer.

When should you stop pouring milk into the coffee?

Before it is too latte

My ex wife died so I went to the cemetery to honor her, I poured a fine 12 year old bottle of scotch on her grave.

But first I filtered it through my kidneys

Did you hear about the grocery store employee who poured a bunch of spices into his pockets?

They fired him for thyme theft

If you pour water to water

It grows

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A drunk walks into a packed bar, holds his wallet in the air, and says, "A round of your finest for everyone in the house! And pour one for yourself, bartender!"

So the bartender pours a drink for everyone in the place, and downs a shot for himself. Then he says to the guy, "That'll be $250, buddy."

The guy says, "I don't have any fuckin' money."

The bartender leaps over the bar, beats the man half to death, and throws him out in the alley out ...

What do you get when you pour boiling water into a rabbit hole?

Hot cross bunnies!

Happy easter everyone

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Bloke goes into a pub, and the barmaid asks what he wants. "I want to bury my face in your cleavage and lick the sweat from between your tits" he says....

...."You dirty pig!" shouts the barmaid, "get out before I get my husband."


The bloke apologizes and promises not to repeat his gaffe. The Barmaid accepts this and asks him again what he wants. "I want to pull your pants down, spread yoghurt between the cheeks of your ass and lick it al...

A man walks in a bar and says: 'I'd like 7 double wiskeys, please.'

The bartender nods and starts pouring 7 glasses of wiskey.

As soon as the first glass is ready the man starts chugging, one glass after another.

The bartender, dumbfounded, asks the man: 'Why are you drinking so fast?'

The man awnsers: 'well, you would do the same as me, if you ...

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A priest hooks a huge fish

A priest hooks a huge fish

Helping him reel it in, a sailor says "Whoa, look at the size of that fucker!".

"Hey, mind your language!" says the priest.

Embarrassed, the sailor thinks quickly and blurts out, "Sorry father, but that's what this fish is called, it's a Fucker fish".<...

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(NSFW) A man walks into a pub and sits down at the bar...

The female bartender asks him if he would like a drink, in which he replys:

"I would love to suck on your breasts"

"Excuse me?" The bartender said.

"I want to spank your ass" the man said rudely.

"Im going to get my husband if you dont stop!" The bartender said.

"A...

I shouldn't have poured all that ketchup into my eyes

It seems pretty obvious now that i have complete Heinz sight

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(Warning: No Punchline) A drunk is hauled in off the street and taken before the magistrate, who asks him to explain his drunken behavior.

”Well,” says the drunk, ”I had ten bottles of whiskey in my cellar and was told by my wife to empty the contents of each and every bottle down the sink, or I’d be in trouble."

”So I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured the contents down the sink, with the exception of one glass...

A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

"Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3:00 in the morning!" He slams the
door and returns to bed.

"Who was that?" asked his wife.

"Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers.

"Did you help him?" she asks.

"No, I did not, it is 3:00 in the morning and it is p...

A bartender is sitting behind his bar when a well dressed but obviously drunk man stumbles in.

"Bartender! A drink for everyone, a drink for me, and a drink for yourself!" The man yells as he approaches.

The bartender pours all the drinks, the whole bar cheers, they all drink. The bartender hands the bill to the man, and he just shrugs and says, "Oh I didn't bring my wallet with me ton...

A bald man with a wooden leg gets invited to a Halloween party. He doesn't know what costume to wear to hide his head and his leg so he writes to a costume company to explain his problem. A few days later he received a parcel with the following note:

Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a pirate's outfit. The spotted handkerchief will cover your bald head and with the wooden leg, you will be just right as a pirate.

Very Truely Yours,
Acme Costume Co

The man thinks this is terrilbe because they have just emphasized his wooden leg an...

The horse who drinks bourbon

A horse walks into a bar and orders 20 shots of bourbon. The bartender, uneasy from meeting an actual talking horse asks “ya got any money?” The horse reaches back into its saddle and produces a hundred dollar bill. The man pours the drinks, the horse drinks every single one in quick order and leave...

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The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse walk into a store.
The first horseman approaches the cashier and says,

"If you do what we ask of you, you shall become immortal and be the only witness to the Apocalypse!"

The cashier, full of fear, relents.

"Alright," says the first horsem...

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2 deaf guys walk into a bar

1 sits down and the other walks up to the bar. The deaf man says "I'd like 2 pints of bitter please" the bartender pours the pints and says to the man " that would be £16" the man says "£16 why £16" the bartender replies "that's 8 for the bitter and 8 for the music" the man asks "music what music. I...

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An elderly woman enters the Canadian National Bank with a bag full of money

She insisted she wanted to speak with the president of the National Bank in order to open an account, saying "a lot of money" was to be dealt with.

After some hesitation, the staff escorted the elderly woman to the president's office. The president asked how much money she wanted to deposit i...

A gohst enters a bar and order a whiskey

A ghost enters a bar and order a whiskey.

But the barman refuses to pour him the drink: "Sorry, we don't serve spirits"

An old dime store novel writer walks into a saloon...

An old west dime novel writer is out looking for a good story when he wanders into a saloon. He sees a group of rough rider lookin' scoundrels playing poker and he musters up enough courage to sit down with 'em (thinkin' he might get a story out if he was lucky). "Mind if I play?"

The others ...

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It's the middle of the night, pouring rain, and a man's car breaks down in the middle of nowhere...

He sees a farmhouse in the distance and walks to it. After knocking on the front door, a farmer opens it and greets the man. Inside, the man sees the farmer's beautiful wife and daughter.

The man tells the farmer about his situation and the farmer is sympathetic, allowing the man to stay the...

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Pierre, a French pilot of WW1 took leave in Paris and went out to sample the nightlife. He has a great night of song and wine and he meets a young lady, who he invites back to his apartment.

The excited pair walk back through the tree lined boulevards and on the way, Pierre drops in to a shop to purchase a bottle of red wine, a bottle of white wine, a bottle of brandy and a box of matches.

When they reach the apartment they waste no time in stripping off and fall passionately ont...

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A little Texas joke

A young man in Oklahoma turns 21. Excited, he tells his father, “I want to finally go to Texas.”

His father warns, “Scooter, you’re a full-grown man, now. I can’t stop you from going to Texas. But I have to warn you… **EVERYTHING IS BIG IN TEXAS!** You can’t be prepared for how absolutely hug...

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A young man walks into a bar, asks the barman to pour him three shots of whisky.

The barman pours them, the youth drinks all three straight down.

“Whoa” says the barman, “are you celebrating something?”

The guy smiles at the barman, “Yeah, my first blowjob”.

“Well”, the barman says, “in that case, have another one on me”.

“Thanks”, replies the youth,...

After my friend poured ketchup in his eyes for a dare he exclaimed, “This was a terrible idea.”

Heinz sight is 20/20

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Pierre, a French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the river Seine

Pierre, a French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the river Seine. It is a beautiful day and love is in the air, so Marie leans over to Pierre and says: "Pierre, kiss me".

So our hero grabs a bottle of red wine and splashes it on Marie's lips....

During my interview today i poured some water into a cup and it overflowed a little bit.

“Nervous?” asked the interviewer

I simply replied, “No I just always give 110%”

WHEN CATS ARE SAD

Bartender: What'll ya have?

Cat: Shot of rum

[Bartender pours it]

[Cat slowly pushes it off the bar]

Cat: Another.

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So I saw a butterfly with no wings today, I poured some Red Bull on it and BAM!

It drowned...

A man walks into a bar... The bartender smiles and says, "What can I get you today, bud?"

The man drunkenly says, "Pint of beer please."

Bartender pours the beer, hands it over and watches as the man gulps it down in one.

"That'll be £4 please, sir."

The man looks at him wide eyed, "I'm not paying for that, you asked me what you could get me so I took up your generou...

Have you considered pouring your alcohol into smaller glasses?

You should try, it’s worth a shot.

TIL when some beers pour, they make a distinct melody.

I would try use math to predict which, but I have never been good with lager rhythmic functions.

An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar...

The first one orders a beer. The second one orders a half a beer. The third orders a quarter of a beer. The bartender says "you're all idiots" and pours two beers.

Three Strings Walk Into a Bar

They all get a table and one of the strings says he’ll buy them drinks.

He goes up to the bar and says “Three beers please.” The bartender looks at him and says “Sorry, we don’t serve strings here.” The string says “What? You’re joking. No strings?” The bartender says “That’s right. Sorry”. T...

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A blind man walks into a bar ...

A blind man walks into a bar and says to the bartender “Give me a shot of your finest 30 year old single malt !”

The bartender says, “You know, that will cost you 100 bucks – it’s pretty expensive”. The blind man says “Not a problem, I have the money and I know what I like !”. So the bartende...

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A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen".

The husband send answer back: *"Pour some warm water over them".*

Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: *"The computer is completely fucked now".*

Rain was pouring and there was a big puddle in front of the pub...

A ragged old man was standing there with a rod and hanging a string into the puddle.


A tipsy- looking, curious gentleman came over to him and asked what he was doing.


'Fishing,' the old man said simply.


'Poor old fool,' the gentleman thought and he invited the ...

I've found that vegan meals require a blender

It makes them easy to pour down the sink

Glue-sniffing drug addicts

A group of experienced glue-sniffers was teaching a newcomer to sniff glue.

But instead of sniffing the glue, the glue sniffer poured it into his mouth, and had to go to the hospital emergency room.

"Hey," reminded one of the glue-sniffers. "Don't expose our glue-sniffing group."
...

A man was filling his car up while drinking beer and later crashed

A forensic scientist, cop, and mechanic head to the wreck to determine the cause.

*"He was poisoned!"* said the scientist.

*"No! This was simply a case of drunk driving."* replied the cop.

*"You're both wrong! He crashed because he filled the gas tank with booze."* exclaimed the...

General secretary Gorbachev is going by car to a meeting.

Suddenly, his driver hits a pig near a small village and stops the car.
Gorbachev gives him 100 rubel and tells him, “Take the dead pig, go into the village, find out who it’s owner was, apologize to him, and give him this money.”
Several hours later the driver returns totally drunk. Gorbachev...

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Breakfast for the Mailman

It was George the Mailman’s last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.

When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who roundly and soundly congratulated him and sent him on his wa...

If you pour salt on a cat's tail, it'll fall off.

If you pour pepper on a cat's tail, it'll fall off, too.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a beer.

The bartender is in shock, an actual horse just walked into his bar, sat down at the bar like a person, and ordered a beer in perfect English.

He tells the horse, "I'm sorry sir, I just have to go speak to my manager for a moment."

So the bartender goes to the back, and explains the s...

Irish drinking

A group of American tourists came in a pub in Cork, Ireland.

One of the Americans said, in a loud voice, -"I hear you Irish think you're great drinkers. I bet $5,000 that no one here can drink 20 pints of Guinness in 30 minutes."

The bar was silent, but the American noticed one Irishm...

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Guy runs into a bar and yells "Quick I gotta get ten shots of your finest whiskey, fuck the cost, pour the shots I'm gonna take them all!"

The bartender is a bit surprised with the request but he lines up the shots, and watches, with a bit of concern but is also kind of impressed as this guy sits on a barstool and slams shot after shot until they're all down.

"Hot damn!" says the bartender. "That's fucked up, what's going on wit...

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A penguin walks into a bar

And orders a glass of coke. The bar tender slides the penguin a cool can. The penguin immediately slides the can back. “Bartender, I do believe I ordered a glass.” Confused, the bar tender pours a glass of Coca Cola and the penguin gets up. A man stops the penguin and asks “Why wasn’t a can ok?” The...

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An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar

An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar

The first mathematician orders a beer

The second orders half a beer

"I don't serve half-beers" the bartender replies

"Excuse me?" Asks mathematician #2

"What kind of bar serves half-beers?" The bartender remarks....

A woman is preparing a French dinner for her parents and sends her husband out to buy some fresh snails.

The husband buys the snails then pops into the pub for a quick drink. One thing leads to another and he stays for a few rounds, so many in fact, that by the time he leaves it's nine in the evening. Realizing he's extremely late the husband runs home, pours the snails over the path leading to his hou...

On a cold winter's morning

Wife texts husband on a cold winter’s morning:

"Windows frozen, won't open."



Husband texts back:

"Gently pour some lukewarm water over it."



Wife texts back 5 minutes later:



"Computer is really screwed up now.”

I swiped right on a girl without a picture, and we matched.

So after a brief chat i went to go pick her up. I wasn't expecting much, probably 300 lbs with bad skin, but hey, I was so desperate it was this or join an incel chatroom.

I walked up to the door and lo and behold, 5'2", baby blue eyes, strawberry blonde hair, all the right curves in all the...

Many years ago, there was a sculptor.

He was a true master at his craft, and he worked hard every day to provide the finest replicas, busts, and statues to the rich and noble. He was held in very high regard, and his name spread across land and oceans and many sought to acquire one of his rare sculptures.

However, even with the ...

The bartender pours him a beer

A time traveler walks into the bar

I poured her a drink and I said "Say when..."

she said "After this drink".

So the waiter asked me what I would like as a side dish...

I told her to recommend me a side dish as I had never been to the restaurant before.

She told me they had curried rice, potato wedges or a supersalad.

I told her I'd like the supersalad. She gave me a strange look and asked me the same question again.

I tell her yes, that I woul...

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A man takes a taxi in the pouring rain...

He tells the driver to head for the airport, shaking water off his hat and fanning his coat to get some more off the whole time. It is then, halfway through the drive, that he notices he's forgotten his wallet. He frantically searches his pockets, but all he finds is a 20 dollar bill.

He asks...

A horse in Russia walks into a bar, with a thick Russian accent the horse asks the bartender to pour him a glass of vodka.

Before I go on with the rest of the joke, you should know this joke is about Descartes' famous philosophy of "I think therefore, I am." I'm explaining that part now, because in soviet Russia you put Descartes before the horse.

The bartender says "you're in here pretty often. Think you might b...

Max receives a text from his neighbor.

Hi Max, its Richard from next door, I've been riddled with guilt for months and have been trying to build up the courage to tell you face to face but i couldn't. When your not around, I've been sharing your wife, day and night, probably much more than you. I haven't been getting it at home recently....

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A man walks into a bar and says, “Give me six double vodkas.” Pouring the shots, the bartender comments, “Wow, you must have had one hell of a day.”

“Yeah, I just found out my oldest son is gay.”

The next day, the same guy comes into the bar and asks for six more double vodkas.

When the bartender asks what’s wrong, the man says, “I just found out that my youngest son is gay, too!”

On the third day, the guy comes into the ba...

Paratroopers from England, Scotland, France and the US were on a plane...

During World War II, four paratroopers each from England, Scotland, France and the US, were on a plane about to jump when they realized there was only one serviceable parachute.

The French paratrooper downed a glass of cognac, said "Pour la France!" and jumped without the parachute.

Th...

James Dean had a tiring day at work

James Dean had a long and tiring day at work, so he decided to stop at a pub on the way home. He ordered a pint of Coors Light and some whiskey. Before the drinks were poured he changed his mind - instead of the pint he asked for a can of Red Bull. He was getting a Red Bull without a Coors!

Silly Russian joke

Flight attendant is making an announcement:
*-Is there an anesthesiologist on board?*
Some bloke says:
*-I am anesthesiologist!*
The flight attended tells him to come to seat 12A. He comes to the seat 12A and there is another bloke pouring vodka into plastic cups. He says:
*...

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Cucumber, pickel and a penis meet at a bar.

Cucumber, pickel and a penis meet at a bar.

The cucumber says, man my life really sucks! Whenever I get big, fat and juciy, someones going to cut me up and put me in a salad!

The pickel says, you think you have it bad, when I got big, fat and juicy, someone poured vinegar and spices...

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A guy goes up to a woman in a bar and says, "I'm gonna make your nipples hard"...

She says, "Oh, yeah...? My husband will kick your ass"...

He says, "And then I'm gonna turn you upside-down, pour beer in your pussy, and then guzzle it all down"...

She says, "That's it, I'm gonna tell my husband, and he's gonna kick your ass but real good"...

She goes home to ...

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My take on a shaggy dog story

A man walks into a bar, orders a pint and sees a sign pinned up above the till - “talking cat, going cheap.”

He calls the barman over and asks him what the deal with the cat is and can he have a look at it. The man shrugs, goes into the back and returns with a mangy old Tom cat.

“Here ...

A new carbonated beverage mimics the sounds of a human voice when you pour it out of the bottle.

or out of the can, soda speak.

A guy runs into the bar and says, "Quick, pour me 5 shots of your most expensive Scotch."

The bartender pours them and the man drinks them as fast as he can.

"Wow that's the fastest I've seen anyone drink," says the bartender.

"Well you'd drink that fast if you had what I had," the man says.

"Oh my gosh," the bartender says, "What do you have?"

The man replies...

[long] My company is locked down and I am required to work from home

I'm used to working in an open office space so this is a huge change for me. In order to make the transition as easy as possible, I have prepared my home office so remind me of work.

* I've purchased a piece of Limburger cheese and placed it on a plate in the middle of the room to remind me o...

A man walks into a bar

Upon sitting down a busty blond waitress pours him a drink and asks if he would like some food. He looks up at the menu above the bar it says:
Hot dog – $2
Cheeseburger – $5
Hand job – $10

He asks the waitress, “Miss are you the one who gives the hand jobs?” She winks and replies, “w...

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A man and his wife visit Las Vegas for their 15th anniversary. Being the spontaneous couple they always have been the husband decides that their first night he will do all the planning.

They go out a fancy steak dinner and he pays extra to have the band sing their wedding song tableside and serenade his wife. She melts.

He then takes her to a magic show and pays extra to have her involved in the main act as the woman who disappears within the act. She is beaming with joy....

I woke up with a really stiff neck. I got out of bed, went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror, my face was white as a sheet! i had a big red nose, bright red fuzzy hair and a really tiny bowler hat on top. I turned on the tap and glitter poured out. Then i realised what had happened..

I slept funny.

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A man walks into a bar and orders nine shots

The bartender apprehensive asks, "whats the occasion?"

The man mumbles, "first blowjob."

The bartender brightens up and pours nine shots and lays them out.

The man downs all nine in a row.

The bartender still smiling says, "hey, make it an even ten. On the house."

...

What do you call a boxer who pours concrete floors as a day job?

Apollo Screed

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TWO GLASSES OF WINE

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in
a day are not enough, reme mber the mayonnaise jar and the 2 glasses of wine...

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front
of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a...

I accused my friend of pouring glue on my weapons.

He denied it but I’m sticking to my guns.

What color does your skin turn when you pour molten gold onto it?

Au-burn




^He^^He^^^He^^^^He

A priest and a Rabbi are very good friends, so they decide to go to a remote lake for a swim.

A priest and a Rabbi are very good friends, so they decide to go to a remote lake for a swim.

Of course they're swimming naked as you do. All of a sudden, two busses pull up.

Out of one pours the rabbis congregation and out of the other pours the priests congregation. Their clothes are...

Man, some dude just poured a gallon of milk all over me

How dairy!

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A pretty blonde walks into a bar and asks the handsome fellow at the bar what he's drinking...

He says, "Magic beer. You want one?"
"Aw, that's stupid. There's no such thing" she says.
"Look, I'll show you". He takes a big swig and proceeds to throw himself  out of a nearby window, where he proceeds to fly up and around the  building, and back into bar window.
"That's incredibl...

A naked lady walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a shot of whiskey

He slowly pours her a drink while he stares her up and down, from head to toe. The lady then asks for another shot of whiskey. The bartender continues to look at her intently. Annoyed, the lady says to him, what’s the matter haven’t you ever seen a naked woman before? The bartender responds, of cour...

I've decided to pour a new foundation for my porch.

I want to make concrete changes to my life.

My boss came into the office and poured us all shots to celebrate the birth of his daughter. I asked why the liquor had little bits of gold floating around in it, and he explained it was Goldschläger

Weird flecks, but ok.

Donald duck walks into a bar...

Donald duck walks into a bar to escape the rain and orders a shot of wild Turkey. The bartender hands him his shot and Sparks up a conversation with the duck.
"Hi Mr duck how is your day going," asks the bartender?
"Oh I'm doing good bartender. I'm in and out of puddles all day and living the ...

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The M4 motorway walks into a bar...

The M4 motorway walks into a bar.

"Oi, barman, I'm the M4 motorway. 500,000 cars drive over me every day, I'm hard as nails. Get me a drink" he orders.

The barman, rather surprised that a talking motorway has walked into his bar, pours him a whisky and he sits down at the table.
<...

Never pour cereal down the loo.

It Kellogg's up your toilet.

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A guy goes into a bar and says to the bartender, "If I show you the most amazing thing you've ever seen, will you let me drink for free tonight?"

The bartender says, "Let me see and I'll consider it."

So the guy reaches into his bag and pulls out a miniature piano and a hamster. The hamster sits in front of the piano and starts playing. And not just banging out "Chopsticks", the hamster is plays Chopin, some ragtime, and even some rock...

One buzzword in today’s business world is “Marketing”

Courtesy of a friend via email; this is a quick 'primer' on Marketing....
People often ask for a simple explanation of "Marketing." Well, OK, here it is:

* You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed." That's Direct Marketing....

TV crew decides to visit a hundred years old man living alone in a cabin in the woods

When they go there they see he is chopping wood and carrying it all by himself. He is active and healthy and has a body of a forty year old man.

They ask him "What is your secret?" and the old man tells them a story:

"Seventy years ago, there was a huge blizzard that came out of nowher...

I strongly believe in karma. What you do to others you'll get back eventually.

So the other week i was pouring ravioli down my neighbours letterbox. And I kept thinking - I wonder what thev've done to deserve this.

I have a story for you. A guy pours cement all over a plot of land...

and then the plot thickens.

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Viagra

All drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name. Example, the trade name is Tylenol and it’s generic name is Acetaminophen.. Aleve is also called Naproxen.

Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen. The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra...

The other day during lunch break I saw one of my colleagues playing some kind of war game on his smartphone. As I poured my coffee I asked him about the game he was playing and we started small talking. Few minutes into our small talk he stated that so far he'd spend $700 in in game purchases.

I bursted into a loud laughter while shouting how that was the stupidest thing and biggest waste of money I've ever heard of!

Man, I was still laughing out loud in disbelief walking off and even still chuckling as I entered the smoking room

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A woman was having an affair while her husband was at work. One day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her horror, she heard her husband’s car pull into the driveway.

“Oh My God – Hurry! Grab your clothes,” she yelled to her lover. “And jump out the window. My husband’s home early!”

I can’t jump out the window. It’s raining out there.

If my husband catches us in here, he’ll kill us both, she replied.

So the boyfriend scoots out of bed, grabs ...

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Apparently, my daughter's boyfriend poured Vodka on her vagina.

Absolut cunt.

A drunk guy walks into a bar...

He says: "Bartender, Pour everyone here a drink, pour one for yourself and give me the bill."

The bartender does just that and hands him the bill. The drunk goes: "Oh I don't have enough money"

The bartender slaps him a few times and tosses him out.

The next day the same guy wal...

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A vampire walks into a bar.

A vampire walks into a bar, he goes over to the bar and says"Bartender I would like two shots of blood." The bartender reaches behind the bar, and pours him two shots of blood.

Another vampire overhears, and decides he would like two shots of blood. The bartender once again pours him two shot...

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A man and woman are driving down the road...

A man and woman are driving down the road after dinner. The weather is awful, pouring rain and freezing cold.

As they go around a corner, the woman spots a dog on the side of the road that looks like it’s been hit by a car. She pleads with her husband to stop so they can check on the poor do...

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A guy walks into a bar. Half of his head is a giant orange.

A guy walks into a bar. Half of his head is a giant orange. The bartender goes,
"OH MY GOD, YOUR HEAD IS A GIANT ORANGE!"
Out of his half-mouth, the guy says, "Yeah, yeah, I know. Pour me a shot and I'll explain."
Confused, the bartender pours the guy a shot. The guy downs it and asks fo...

What's the difference between where you pour dirty water and The Rock?

One's the the bottom of a sink and the other's a Dwayne.

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