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Schizophrenics Jokes

I hate being schizophrenic

So do I

Where do paranoid schizophrenics ride their bicycles?

On the psychopath.

Schizophrenics aren't crazy

Well, that's what the voices tell me

A schizophrenic walks into a bar.

A schizophrenic walks into a bar.

A sign above the bar reads "Absolutely No Schizophrenics Served At This Establishment!"

Bartender says "Hello. What can I get you?"

The schizophrenic says "a shot of whiskey, and make it a double!"

The schizophrenic says "a shot of whisk...

Do all the voices in a schizophrenics head sound the same...?

Asking for a... friend.

Mirrors

Skyping for schizophrenics

long. Two cops lead an unfortunate man into a padded cell

Instantly the men in white coats grab him, wrench his arms behind his back and, when he screams in pain, the psychiatrist tears down his trousers and jags him with a needle.

As they're carrying the unconcious body out the younger of the cops, shocked, says:

"Was that really necessary? ...
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