My doctor prescribed a new drug to treat my depression.

It’s called Enditol.

Maybe if the grass on my front lawn had depression

It would cut itself

I have a depression joke...

but ultimately it’s too long, doesn’t really go anywhere, and eventually makes you wonder if it’s even worth continuing

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why doesn't Viagra help with depression?

It just makes things harder.

To the guy that stole my depression medication...

I hope you’re happy.

I used to suffer from depression but through hard work, persistence, and never giving up

I now suffer from anxiety and depression

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Having a massive penis is a lot like having depression...

it's just something you learn to live with.

Depression/suicide jokes are basically yo mama jokes of our generation — they're lazy, unfunny and useless

Just like me

Today I learned about the links between high intelligence and depression

I just wish it made me feel better....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Irritable Bowel Syndrome saved me from depression...

It’s hard to feel empty when you’re so full of shit.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Depression Era Prostitute NSFW

Three generations of prostitutes were hanging out on the street corner talking about their day.

The youngest complains “I just sucked that guy off and all I got was a lousy $50!”

The middle aged one says “$50?!?! Hell, when I was your age I would be thrilled with $10!”

The eldes...

My friend Billy Bob and I visited a place where you can stand in three states at once: Oklahoma, Kansas, and Missouri. Billy Bob opened up and said that he was actually in a fourth state; crippling depression. I said, “I’m so sorry”

“... but you can’t count Missouri twice.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between my ex and my depression

My depression fucked me harder

The other day I tried an escape room called depression

And I did not escape

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance.

Saturday, Sunday.

People are making depression so bad

Back then it used to be Great

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Hulk Hogan: Doc, I had to struggle through manic-depression all my career!

Therapist: Are you saying you had to wrestle mania?

A resident of St. Louis was recently diagnosed with depression

He's living in Missouri.

How do you get over seasonal depression?

You just fall out of it

Why did the restaurant staff deem the waiters absence due to depression to be a technical issue?

Because their servers were down.

The US government has been there for us through hard times From the great depression, the numerous market crashes, through pandemics of flu and tragedies like the loss of American lives.

I'm starting to think they're bad luck

[META] r/Jokes keeps me going

I'm sorry if this is not allowed here but I had to share. I have a bunch of health issues, severe anxiety, and depression. I've on multiple occasions felt like giving up. Sometimes, no matter how much support you have it is difficult to keep going. That's where you guys come in. I read your jokes al...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A fourth generation prostitute goes home to her great grandmother's house for a family dinner

A fourth generation prostitute goes home to her great grandmother's house for a family dinner. She begins complaining to her family about work. "Jesus! Men these days complain about paying £50 for a blowjob! It's hard work! I earn that money!"

Mum, who was a hooker in the 1980s laughs, "Fifty...

What do you call an emo kid in Hawaii

A tropical depression

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A farmer quickly purchased land in a low-lying depression and began raising donkeys there. He did so with skill and the donkeys rarely got away.

Long story short, he hauled ass to amass asses in a hole asset, whole-ass not half-ass, lassoed the asses so that they wouldn't bypass the ass hole.

Another one translated from Russian...

Doctor: This medicine is for insomnia, this one is for nervous break-down, and also take this one for depression.
Patient: Thank you very much, doctor, but do you have any other medicine besides vodka?

They did a study comparing the brains of 17 people with depression and the brains of 18 healthy people

They discovered that on average, the depressed group had one brain less.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Takes place during the Great Depression.

A man and his wife were barely scraping by on their combined salaries, but they weren’t making enough to make ends meet. One night, they lay in bed hungry after skipping supper. Now the woman had an idea, but she didn’t think her husband would approve of it. She turned to the man and said,
“Why ...

Amazon is launching a new personal assistant for people suffering from depression.

They are calling it Alexa Pro.

So there’s three guys in the middle of the Great Depression.

Their names are Bob, Joe, and Ronnie. Now Bob, he's a pretty smart guy. Definitely the smartest of the three. Joe is, well he's not great, but he's had a few good ideas in his time. Now Ronnie. Ronnie is dumb. And when I say dumb I mean _dumb_. Like really, really dumb. So one day, these three are p...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My therapist said the best treatment for depression is to vigorously rub salt into my skin in order to draw out excess moisture.

Wow thanks I'm cured.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My doctor prescribed me Viagra for my depression

He thought it would lift me up, but it just makes everything a whole lot harder.

I dont know how the US government can get mad at students with depression for shootings

when the only reason the US got over the Great Depression was because of WWII.

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