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Adhd Jokes

ADHD & Sleep Problems. Funny That You Asked!!

I have ADHD and have troubles getting to sleep. Doctor recommended counting sheep...

1 sheep. 2 sheep. 3 sheep. Cow. Duck. Horse. \*Old MacDonald had a farm\* and bingo was his name-o!

I’m finally starting to overcome my ADHD. Today I went on a 10 minute run, and then I spent 5 minutes on cleaning the kitchen.

And then I spent 45 minutes typing out 2 sentences to post to Reddit for karma

What does ADHD stand for?

Attention Deficit HEY DOUGHNUTS!!!

I have OCD and ADHD

so everything has to be perfect! But not for very long!

What happens when you leave your ADHD medication in your Ford Fiesta?

It turns into a Ford Focus.

I'd tell you a joke about ADHD

God damnit, where was I going with this?

ADHD Joke

Roses are red violets are blue ADHD be like Fire truck,triangle,circle,glue.

We'll call it "The cognitive and behavioral fun time vacation for people with ADHD"

'Cause apparently "concentration camp" isn't politically correct

I have compiled a list of the 10 worst things about my ADHD.

1.

I went to take an online ADHD test today...

but gave up quickly because it was stupid and boring.

I told my doctor, “I think I have ADHD because I keep forgetting where I parked my Ford.”

Doctor: That’s not how ADHD works.

Me: But I keep losing my Focus.

What do you call a person with severe ADHD

AD4K

Heard this ADhD joke a while back. A man walks into a bar with a penguin and a foul-mouthed parrot and somehow wins a bet or something.

Sorry, I guess I wasn't really paying attention.



I bought a book that said it could help me harness the power of ADHD.

I never finished it.

My doctor diagnosed me with schizophrenia and ADHD.

Which means I hear voices but not for long enough to drive me insane.

Studies show ADHD students cost the school more on average

Because they cannot afford to pay attention.

I signed up for an ADHD support group...

We meet every Tuesday night from 6:00 to 6:08, 6:12 to 6:22, 6:31 to 6:44, and 6:46 to 7:00.

Where do parents send their ADHD children during the summer?

Concentration camps

Welcome to the Mental Health Hotline.

*If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.*

*If You have Ocd, Push The numbers 1, 2, 3, 7*

*If you are co-dependent, ask someone to press 2 for you.*

*If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.*

*If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what ...

Doctor says my kid has some form of hereditary ADHD

He explained it to me, but I didn't really listen.

Remember When ADHD Was Just ADD?

Me neither.

I think I have ADHD

But I can't bring myself to finish reading any articles on it.

I just sat down to write a joke about my ADHD.

Oh wait, a Buzzfeed quiz.

What do we want? More research into a cure for ADHD! When do we want it?

Let's play swingball!

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb.

One Jeremy! One! We've changed our entire lives, took on lower paying jobs. Spent years and time on therapy and pills and connections so you can have a normal life. So change the damn lightbulb Jeremey. CHANGE THE DAMN LIGHTBULB...

October is ADHD awareness month.

Appropriately enough it is also fire prevention month, breast cancer awareness month, the first couple of weeks are part of Hispanic heritage month and and some other things that I forgot.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Joke my ADHD brain thought of out of nowhere

So the Hogwarts police confiscated a coffee cup suspecting it of dangerous enchantments. Turns out the police that grabbed it drank a bit too much butterbeer. It was just a normal coffee cup that belonged to some arrogant human thief.







It was a smug muggle mugger's mug.

What type of orange juice do people with ADHD have trouble drinking?

Concentrate!

If you open a camp to help kids with ADHD

Is it a concentration camp?

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb?

Let's go ride our bikes.

One of the effects of ADHD…

Is that you can’t

What did the boy with ADHD get for Christmas?

Distracted

How do people with ADHD experience déjà vu?

The word saippuakivikauppias is the longest palindrome ever.

My ADHD is so bad

When the doctor ordered a blood test I failed it.

I've got a friend with ADHD and, interestingly, he seems to be sharper than most people.

I guess that he's got AD4K.

I was gonna make a joke about my ADHD.

Never mind, I’ll finish it later.

How do I improve my ADHD?

I really want AD4K.

What do you call a kid with ADHD who needs glasses?

AD420p

I thought my new ADHD meds would help my drinking and it works.

Instead of a half dozen glasses of bourbon with only a sip or two drunk from them, I actually finish them all.

Joke my 9 year old daughter, Emma made up: What kind of list does Emma have a hard time with?

List-ening!

(She has ADHD)

So I’m trying to open a chain of outdoor, overnight facilities to help children overcome symptoms of ADHD.

Unfortunately I’m having trouble getting the bank to approve a loan for concentration camps.

My idea of holding a summer vacation school to help kids with severe ADHD failed.

Do you think it's because I called it a "Concentration Camp?"

I have ADHD and I always think I’m sick.

My doctors call me the Hyper Hypochondriac.

You think ADHD is a big problem now?

80 years ago there were millions of people in camps trying to concentrate.

There are three things holding me back in life:

1. Extreme ADHD that makes it impossible to finish a task.

I started a camp for kids with ADHD but nobody showed up.

I guess calling it Concentration Camp was a bad idea.

Psychologists have discovered a new way to see into the minds of those with ADHD

They're calling it AD4K

What do you call someone who worries that they might have ADHD?

A hyperchondriac

Did you heard about the suicide bomber with ADHD??

His brain was everywhere

Schizophrenia is ADHD on hard mode.

"2+2=..... stop whispering my name grandma! You've been dead for 20 years!"

People think I have ADHD and I really don't..

To prove it I'll give you 10 reasons why Football is better than rugby

I set up a summer school in Israel for kids with ADHD ...

But apparently my name for it, Jewish Concentration Camp won’t work.

My son, who has ADHD, has been taking meds to help him run faster.

He's now AD480p.

If they would come up with a new name for a heavy form of ADHD

It would be AD4K

What do you call a high resolution video taken during Jesus' resurrection?

ADHD

I started a summer camp for kids with add/adhd to teach them to manage their symptoms.

It didn’t do so well, people kept telling me “Concentration Camp” was a bad name.

My kid has Attention Deficit Disorder so I have sent him to a summer camp for kids with ADHD.

It's known as a Concentration Camp.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Spiderman, Iron-man and Superman decided to check who has the strongest erection

Spiderman, Iron-man and Superman decided to check who has the strongest erection

 

Iron-man thinks about Pepper Potts hangs 5-gallon bucket on his shlong and walks 5 yards. Everybody praises him.

 


Spiderman thinks about Gwen Stacy hangs 20-gallon ke...

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