Why are there more Chuck Norris jokes than Bruce Lee jokes?

Because Bruce Lee is not a joke

Bruce lee was fast but do you know about his even faster brother?

Sudden Lee

An old Joke by Lee Mack on... 8 out of 10 Cats plays Countdown, I believe?

I popped into an second-hand store the other day and bought a pencil. What's remarkable about the pencil, is that it used to be used by Shakespeare!



...Only thing is, the top part is all chewed up, so I can't tell if it's 2B or not 2B.

What does Bruce Lee order in Burger King?

WOPPAAAH!

How do you call Bruce Lee's vegan cousin?

Broco Lee

I met Bruce Lee's vegan brother today.

His name is Brocko Lee.

Bad news. I broke up with Lorraine. She found out I was seeing Clair Lee

The good news is I can see Clair Lee now Lorraine has gone.



EDIT : I've never heard this but I'm getting tanked for it by my friends

But I can see all obstacles in my way.
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind.
It's gonna be a bright (bright)
Bright (bright) suns...

What was Bruce Lee's favourite fruit?

Pa pa ya!

What did Bruce Lee do when there was only a minute break between filming scenes?

He had a one-inch lunch.

Why does Bruce Lee get excited when he visits Texas?

Because that means he can eat at WA-TAAAAburger

Aunt Millie's secret recipe has been stolen by Sara Lee's brother.

Alleged Lee.

I’ve just discovered Bruce Lee had a vegetarian brother…

Broco Lee

Did you see the video of Bruce Lee fighting his long lost brother?

Man, it was Ug Lee.

For anyone attending Stan Lee's funeral...

Make sure you stay after the ceremony is finished.

Donkey could take down Bruce Lee...

...because he entered the dragon

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Bruce Lee

Everyone remembers him and his son Brandon Lee but people rarely talk about Barry Lee and seldom mention Vague Lee.

What kind of jokes does Bruce Lee tell?

One-inch puns.

My girlfriend, Lorraine, dumped me when she found out I was cheating on her with her fit friend, Claire Lee

Good news, I can see Claire Lee now Lorraine has gone.

So, last semester I met this guy in my business class

He was cool & an international student. His name was Ving and was from China. His English was really good for a second language, better than I could ever be learning a second language. We’d often hang out and I show him the sites and tourist destinations in my city. He's much cooler as well as b...

A couple just had their first son , the husband is half Irish and half Indian , the wife half chinese and half Italian both wishes to have their son name after their heritage ..

After much argument they decided on the name.


Ravi O'Lee

The Confederacy had some top-tier military leadership

General Lee speaking.

A good-natured conspiracy theorist wakes up and realizes that he's died in his sleep and gone to heaven...God appears and says "welcome my son, as a reward for your virtuous life, I can answer one question for you about any topic you'd like with absolute certainty..."

The man thinks for a second and asks God "who actually killed JFK?"

God's eyes roll back in to his head for a minute while he scours the divine historical record. After a moment, he returns to normal and says "Lee Harvey Oswald."

The man replies "Wow! This goes way deeper than I though...

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I never understood how Ty Lee joined the Kyoshi warriors at the end of Avatar.

That's like if the United States hired Nazi rocket scientists to work on our space program after WW2 ended.

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What is Harper Lee’s favorite cocktail?

Tequila Mockingbird

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What did Charles Lee say after being called a pussy by Hamilton?

"I'm a genital, weee!"

What is Bruce Lee’s favorite drink?

Wah-taaaaaaaaaaa

A Chinese baby was born way too early..

So, his parents named him Sudden Lee.

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What do you call a hotel for people with small dicks

The bear-lee inn

Do you like jokes about the American Civil War?

No, I General Lee don’t find them funny

Everyone knows of famous martial artist, Bruce Lee

But no one ever talks about his family.

His brother, the revolutionary vegetarian activist, Brocco Lee.

His cousin, the hesitant statistician, Probab Lee.

His uncle, the trustworthy politician, Honest Lee.

And of course, the Spanish inquisitor, Juan "Expected" Lee.

Bruce Lee was at a doctor's appointment, but an hour passed and the doctor still wasn't there. Bruce did not get up, leave, or complain. Instead he stayed sitting in his seat.

He was waiting patient Lee.

What do you call Bruce Lee pulling a Radio Flyer?

Enter the wagon.

Bruce Lee had a cousin who used to get beaten up a lot...

He was known as Bruise Lee.

What would an alcoholic Harper Lee have written ?

Tequila Mockingbird

What do John wilkes booth, lee harvey oswald and kobe bryant have in common?

They never miss a shot

I'm going to miss Stan Lee

He was a marvel

Robert E. Lee once said: "I like whiskey. I always did. And that is why I never drink it."

That's just generally speaking.

I had this friend named Leonardo. We called him Lee. Anyway, he didn't have alot of money. In fact, he was basically broke...

So one day he stole some bread because he was starving and couldn't buy food. He was caught and sentenced to death. It's really not that funny, but this joke was poor Lee executed.

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A king summons three of his most loyal subjects to a meeting

The king looks at the first man, who was named Rand.

"Rand, kiss my hand!" he orders.

Rand obeys him and kisses his hand. The king looks at the second subject, who was called Lee.

"Lee, kiss my knee!"

Lee obeys and kisses his king's knee. The king turns in the direction o...

A man goes to the mechanic.

He says "My car goes rr- rr-rr-"
The mechanic says "Yes, the transmission probably needs replacing."

The man frowns and says "My car goes rr-rr-rr-"
The mechanic says "Yes, the transmission probably needs replacing."

The man looks angry and says "Would you l-let me ff-finish! I h...

Heard about the Robert E Lee statue at Duke University campus?

[removed]

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Lee Smart was always a trouble maker throughout his life.

In school, Lee Smart was always getting in trouble. His friend, Isaac, always stuck by his side, though. They were always best friends.

Though Isaac was getting sick of Lee’s crap. Lee kept drinking and driving, he kept smoking Marijuana and snorting Cocaine. Isaac was so close to just leavi...

What do you call an accident prone martial artist?

Bruise Lee

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As a single man trying to attract a partner, it's important to project the qualities you desire

Which I understand. But boy.. oh boy have I had to suck a lot of dick lately


\~ Norm MacDonald joke read by Bobby Lee

How do you call a guy named Lee that has no friends?

Lonlee

Who is the best Kung fu vegetable?

Brocc Lee

What's the name of Bruce Lee's vegetarian cousin?

BrocoLee

Everyone knows of famous martial artist, Bruce Lee

He also had a brother, the revolutionary vegan activist, Brocco Lee

I wouldn't be too worried about Stan Lee dying...

Marvel will just resurrect him in a few issues

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Stan Lee wrote Tony Stark as a character with a sexual identity crisis.

He's all man, but likes to dress as FEmale

Why did Bruce Lee's brother Earl make it to work before his shift began?

Because he's Earl Lee!

Lee, Lifeson, and Peart aren't in any hurry to do anything these days

There's no Rush.

One day, a young deer named Frank Lee went out with his mother...

As they were carrying on with their daily business, they came across a river with a beaver building a dam.


The young deer asked his mother, “Why is the beaver building a dam?”


His mother responded, “Not for long. Watch and learn, son.”


The mother then proceeded to...

Recently found out that Stan Lee was an exceptional hockey player.

His very first practice and he already had the Stanley Cup..

There once was a plumber named Lee

Who was plumbing his girl by the sea

In the midst of their plumbing,

She said, "Hush! Someone's coming."

Said the plumber, still plumbing, "It's me."

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I’ve been thinking recently if the bands Toto, Tommy lee and Marvin Gaye firmed a band it would be

Toto lee Gaye

There is person who wanders the Gobi Desert

They call her, Lone Lee

Lee, the man I grew up thinking was my father, recently told me he doesn't have any kids...

...I could've sworn he was my real dad, but a parent Lee not!

My friend Lee likes to allow extra time for his schedule.

That's just the LeeWay

What was Bruce Lee's beverage of choice?

WAH-TAH!

If you understand how Bruce Lee felt while stoned and reaching nirvana...

You'd be in a high Lee enlightened position

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Lee has a terrible headache

Lee calls in work and say "I no come work today. I really sick, got headache, stomach ache, and legs hurt. I no come to work today."

His boss says "I really need you today, Lee. You know, whenever I am not feeling OK like you, I go ask my wife for sex. I always feel better after."

A co...

Why is Bruce Lee so good at telling jokes?

Because if his punch line doesn't work, you still get a kick out of it.

A man named Rick walks into his room after a long day of work and sees his wife crying on their bed.

He askes her what it was all about and she said that she had been threatened by someone she thought was her friend earlier that evening.

Now, Rick has no idea how to handle this, so goes to confront his friend Lee, who has some experience with things like this.

After a long discussion...

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One day, legendary fencing master Maximilian Lee is looking for a new challenger

After decades dedicating himself to his art, he finds there is no one worthy of fighting anymore. He travels to the farest corners of the world looking to reinvigorate his love of the blade.

He travels to France and challenges their most skilled and famous fighter, but to his disappointment,...

New announcement about Stan Lee's funeral

It will feature a cameo appearance by Stan Lee.

R.I.P. Stan Lee

Dying: The final thing Jack Kirby did first, but Stan Lee gets all the attention for.

Susie Lee Done Fell In Love

Susie Lee done fell in love;
She planned to marry Joe.
She was so happy ’bout it all
She told her Pappy so.

Pappy told her, “Susie gal,
You’ll have to find another.
I’d just as soon yo’ Ma don’t know,
But Joe is yo’ half brother.”

So Su...

What does a trebuchet in a convent and Bruce Lee have in common?

They're both nunchuckers.




Yes lame but it's OC

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I am like the Bruce lee of sex. No I am not amazingly handsome and highly skilled and charismatic,

but I will knock the wind out of your body with my 1 inch punch.

White Nationalist should honor the true legacy Robert E. Lee

And surrender.

Bruce Lee: “flow like water, you understand”

Me: “water you saying?”

My marriage is over.

I loved my wife Lorraine in the beginning, but for the longest time I've had a crush on my friend Claire-Lee Robins, who I know feels the same way about me. Eventually Lorraine found out about my secretive feelings, and just like that, she packed her bags and left.

I do feel bad about it all...

Stan lee died and Kanye is still alive and well.

Now that’s a joke.

Given enough time, everything becomes new again... however, this is definitely a repost

There are a pair of twins called Ving and Ling. Ving decided to go to the town hall to change his name. Ling decided to give him a lift there. When they arrived Ling reminded Ving that he would disgrace their family if he changed his name to Lee.
Ving takes a form and quickly fills it out to chan...

Why was Spike Lee mad after the Oscars?

Jussie Smollett got the Oscars for writing, producing and directing BlackKlansmen

Bruce lee would beat dwane Johnson in a fight

Water erodes rock

Harper Lee made her own alcohol several decades ago, researchers found out it's called

Tequila Mockingbird.

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A spiritual healer named Lee...

...ducked into an alley to pee.
He pissed in the eye,
Of some blind homeless guy,
Who cried, "holy shit! I can see!"

When you just found out by a coincidence you have two aunts named Lee.

A pair aunt lee just happened

What’s the difference between Thor and Lee Harvey Oswald?

Oswald actually went for the head

What did the Spanglish Stan Lee say to the matador before the bullfight?

Excel, Señor!





RIP Stan Lee

Just saw a post about Stan Lee, Avicii, Stephen Hawking and Burt Reynolds.

It was a rip-post.

My 3 sons placed 1st, 2nd and 3rd in a talent contest judged by Lee Kun-hee

Jake juggled, Daniel danced and Sam sung

Lee decides that he wants to find his place in the intricacy of the universe, and leaves his family to become a Buddhist monk...

He treks for days into the mountains, before finding a monastery, hundreds of miles from civilization. He enters the monastery, and bowing before the lama, requests to become a monk.

The lama accepts, but on one condition; he must only speak two words every five years. Still determined as eve...

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