What do you call a sick bird trying to get across the border?
An illegal
upvote downvote report
How does a vampire get across the ocean?
a boat
upvote downvote report
Six Supreme Court justices, floating face-down in a river
All 6 conservative members of the SCOTUS got stranded in the woods with only a giant suitcase and a couple of paddles. Then they came to a raging river- it was fast-moving, wide and rocky but only waist deep. They began to bicker over how to get across. Kavanaugh, Thomas, and Gorsuch said "We are st...
upvote downvote report
How do crazy people get across the woods?
They use the psycho-paths
upvote downvote report
How did the dead baby get across the road?
Stapled to the Chicken.
upvote downvote report
How did the Mexicans get across the border?
They went through Juan by Juan.
^Forgive ^me.
upvote downvote report
How did the crazy man get across the forrest?
He took the psycho path. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
upvote downvote report
A blonde was walking down a river trying to find a way to get across.
She came across a blonde on the opposite side of the river, so she called out “Hey, how do you get to the other side?!”
The other blonde called back “You ARE on the other side!”
upvote downvote report
3 blonde women are on one side of a river...
...wondering how they will get across. The first one decides to pray saying "God please make me smart enough to get across this river." so God turns her into a brunette and she swims across the river. The second also prays saying "Dear God, please make me twice as smart as the last girl so I can get...
upvote downvote report
Yoda and Luke are walking through the swamp. Part of their usual training course involves shimmying along a cliff ledge, but today, there’s a long break in the ledge they can’t cross...
“Something for this I have.” Yoda says. He reaches into his bag and takes out a bunch of regular dinner table forks and a roll of duct tape.
He tapes several forks together to make a bridge and lays it down, allowing the two of them to get across.
When they get back to Yoda’s hovel, th...
upvote downvote report
There are 500 bricks on a plane...
- There are 500 bricks on a plane. One falls off. How many are left?
499
- What are the three steps to putting an elephant in a refrigerator?
Open fridge, put elephant in, close fridge
- What are the four steps to putting a giraffe in a refrigerator?
Open fridge, t...
upvote downvote report
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Spectre pool party
So Blofeld is holding a pool party for Spectre. There is the usual laughing, drinking, catalogues of secret weapons and torture devices etc.
And Blofeld announces “for entertainment tonight I am offering a million dollars for anyone who will swim across my swimming pool full of man-eating ...
upvote downvote report
Two German explorers
Two German explorers were making their way east across New York when they came to a wide river.
Karl: How vill vee get across dee large body of vater?
The other explorer sees a large, steel object north of them.
Heinrich: Look der es und structure dat vee can use to cross <...
upvote downvote report
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.