How Amazon's acquisition of Whole Foods really went down:
Bezos: Alexa, buy me olives from Whole Foods.
Alexa: Sure, buying all of Whole Foods.
Why did Elon Musk abandon his Twitter acquisition?
He wanted to experience, for the first time in his life, the sensation of pulling out
After the acquisition of Activision, Microsoft has decided to rename Teams to...
Calls of duty
You heard about the latest Coca-Cola acquisition?
That’s going to Costa lot.
My company got bought out by a Madrid based firm today. Everyone seemed surprised.
Nobody expects the Spanish Acquisition
What did the arts museum acquisitions director say to the cultural benefactor and collector of early Renaissance paintings?
A guy walks into a bar
A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "My company got bought out by a Madrid-based firm today," the guy tells the bartender. "Everyone was surprised." "Well," the bartender replies. "No one expects the Spanish acquisition."
My buddy and I have been working at this company for several years
We thought everything was going great. Numbers were up, sales were soaring! But one day our boss announced that the entire company was being bought out by some company in Spain.
“What?!” I exclaimed to my friend. “This is so out of the blue! Never in a million years could I have seen this com...
The Native Americans were surprised to be colonised by Europeans
No one expects the Spanish Acquisition
Why can't Popeye the Sailor's enemies ever predict whether or not he's purchased spinach that day?
Because no one expects the spinach acquisition!!!
Two native Cubans are going for a stroll through the forest.
The first guy mentions that he didn’t finish his hunting quota in time for supper, and explains that if he doesn’t find something suitable soon, his wife is going to be very cross with him.
The second guy, recognizing his friend’s plight, offers to assist the first in his hunt but asks a favo...
Banta the Furniture dealer
Banta, a furniture dealer from Ludhiana, decided to Expand the line of furniture in his store, so he decided to go to Chennai to see what he could find.
After arriving in Chennai he met with some manufacturers and selected a line that he thought would sell well Back home in Lud...
Bored at work so I wrote my first joke. It’s extremely dumb but maybe it’ll make someone laugh.
An extremely wealthy family owned countless successful companies, bought out competitors and even purchased new ventures if they looked promising enough. Nothing was too big or small, and nothing was off limits.
The family consisted of a mother (Linda), father (Robert) and 3 sons (Robert Jr.,...
Carlos was the proud owner of a Mexican Bed & Breakfast in Cancun...
It was founded by his Great-grandfather in the 1800s. He had come to Mexico from Spain and bought the run-down place with a loan from from a businessman back home. Through hard work and sheer determination, he had built the place up to a relatively successful B&B.
After his death, he lef...
Vacancy announcements these days
- Work experience of 50 years or more; - Incumbent must defeat a dragon; - Willingness to work on weekends and holidays; - Helicopter piloting licence; - Ability to programme in any language imaginable; - Knowledge of Swahili at least at uppеr intеrmеdi...
A lady finds out what a reference said about to her potential employer and is upset by it.
She calls her friend and asks him: "Why did you say I was a racist?!"
The friend is confused and asks "what are you talking about?"
The lady tells him, "You know how I listed you as a reference for that job in publishing? Because I always wanted to work in publishing? Well, not alway...
A couple of years ago Barry went hiking across Europe
But as time passed by he never returned home. His many friends tried contacting him in any way they could imagine, but his phone was disconnected, he wasn't active on his social media accounts anymore - it was like he disappeared off the face of the Earth.
Ultimately, everyone had forgotten a...
It just all depends on how you look at some things...
Judy Wallman, a professional genealogy researcher in southern California , was doing some personal work on her own family tree. She discovered that Congressman Harry Reid's great-great uncle, Remus Reid, was hanged for horse stealing and train robbery in Montana in 1889. Both Judy and Harry Reid ...