UPJOKE
reproductionoffspringprocreationbiogenesisproductionproducecreatepropagationcontemporariesmultiplicationcoevalsposteritybreedinggenerategen

What do hillbillies call their relatives from past generations?

Their incestors


Came up with it myself. How did I do?

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It's been 125,000 generations since the emergence of human species, 7,500 generations since human physiology reached what is essentially its modern state, 500 generations since the agricultural revolution, 20 generations since the scientific revolution...

And 1 generation since I fucked your mom.

Just like you, progress is slow.

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A joke for the older generations

So there once was this women by the name of Marge, who could never seem to snag a man to stay by her side for more than a year! She had many husband and would bear many kids with each husband. By the end of her fertility period she had given birth to a 100 kids! In order to remember all their names ...

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Did you hear about that rare movie that has been hailed as an inspirational timeless classic?

They said it would inspire people for generations to come.

Two generations from now your grandkids might scrutinize this era and ask "really, grandpa? you really did that to the environment? Didn't you even recycle anything, come on???

Then with a grim expression on your face you scowl

"Fool, I was on reddit! I recycled everything at least 3000 times"

Three generations were having brunch together

The grandson looks over at his newlywed wife and asks her, "Will you pass the honey, honey?" She giggles and passes the honey.
The father, not to be outdone, looks over to his wife and asks, "Will you pass the sugar, sugar?" She laughs, "You old charmer," and passes the sugar.
The Grandfather...

What do you call a bed that gets passed down through generations?

An heir mattress

Three generations apart, watching a soccer game

"Hey great grandpa, watch this soccer game!"

"Sure, which two countries are playing?"

"Austria - Hungary."

"Against who?"

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I buried my best in a time capsule.

For the generations to come.

A boy is writing a paper on childbirth and asks his parents, "How was I born?"

His mother awkwardly answers, "The stork brought you."


"Oh," says the boy. "Well, how were you and Daddy born?"


"Um, well, the stork brought us, too, and Grandpa and Grandma."


The boy begins his paper, "This report has been very difficult to write due to the fact tha...

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A Hypnotist was hired at a retirement home.

He was trying to hypnotize 150 old folks. He was swinging his pocket watch back and forth. The watch had been passed down from generations. As he was swinging the watch, the chain snapped, sending the watch plummeting to the ground, breaking into thousands of pieces. β€œ!” He yelled. It took them ...

Future generations increasingly find it harder to receive sympathy as they get sick

My grandchild was sick the other day and I asked him if it was the flu.

β€œNo, it’s the new COVID-69.”

All I could say was, β€œnice.”

"May your thousand generations be childless!" yelled my best friend in anger.

He never did think his curses through...

The photographers of previous generations had it tough.

No matter how hard they tried, they always developed a negative image.

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Studies show young people are having less than previous generations.

I knew I was ahead of my time.

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My friend and I were talking about the names of generations...

"What do you call the generation after millenials?"

"Fucked"

How do dolphins and whales pass down and share knowledge through the generations?

Via podcasts, naturally.

Mark zuckerberg is living out most of this generations greatest fear.

Hes having to explain his undeleted internet history.

Catholics and Christians have waited generations for Jesus' return. Little did they know that though he's been here all along.

Because he's brown

I dont see why we need to leave our planet in a better state for future generations

The current generation cant get out of middle school before dying off.

How many pilots does it take to kill a whole generations ears?

21

I can count the number of generations of inbreeding in my family on one hand

It's 12

A guy goes into a restaurant for lunch.

After careful consideration, he decides he will have a bowl of the day's soup. The waiter praises him for his decision.

"Ah, excellent choice. The chef makes the soup fresh each day from only the freshest, locally-sourced ingredients. It is completely organic, and there are no additives or pr...

How many hereditary peers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Change? How dare you, sir! That lightbulb has been in my family for seven generations!
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